Written by: mamazano
Title: Yellow Jack
Rating: PG-13Characters: Jack, Gibbs, Scarlett & Giselle, Pierre and others
Disclaimer: Disney owns them. Well, except for Thomas. He technically belongs to compassrose7577 .
Oh, and Pierre. He's mine, all mine. I just like playing with them.

Summary: Jack has a plan that cannot fail. Or can it.

A/N: A new story in the S&G AU.

"Well, I think the idea is crazy!"

"Crazy? It's bloody brilliant, that's what it is!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Ladies, please!"

"You tell her, Josh. The idea is ludicrous."

"Like those stockings you're wearing."

"Why, I never!"

Gibbs looked back and forth at the two irate women and decided it was certainly crazy to remain any longer.

"I best be going," he said, sidling towards the door of the Painted Lady. "I'll just tell Jack you've changed your minds." He hurriedly banged open the door and set out down the muddy street towards the Tortuga harbor. Better to get away while he could, let Jack sort it out later.

"Josh, wait!" Giselle ran into the street, splashing mud on her new stockings. Turning, she stalked back inside, waggling a finger at Scarlett. "Now look what you've done!"

"Me?" Scarlett folded her arms and huffed, "I am not the one crazy enough to think Jack's little plan would work in the first place." She looked down her nose at Giselle's mud splattered legs and added, "And you say my stockings are ludicrous."

"Why you…" Giselle picked up a box off the nearest display table and threw it at her. Unfortunately, the box contained a very expensive talc, imported all the way from France. Even more unfortunately, the owner of the shop happened to walk into the room at that exact moment.

"Mon Dieu! What have you done!" Pierre scurried over, just as the two women locked into hand-to-hand combat. Scarlett, wielding a parasol, swung at Giselle, only to slip on the powdery floor and whack Pierre instead. The three of them tumbled, bringing another display of creams and lotions down with them, their fragrance filling the air as they smashed to the floor.

The tinkling of a bell sounded over the ensuing bedlam. Looking up, they found Jack Sparrow standing over them, mustache twitching in amusement.

"If I am not mistaken, this is exactly how I found you the day you two met. I hope you aren't going to make of habit of this."

"Jack!" The women scrambled to sit up, as Jack extended a helping hand. Pierre emerged from the bottom of the pile, hair white with talc and a fierce expression in his eyes.

"Habit?" Pierre whirled on the women. "You have ruined my shop. Look at this! It is a catastrophe! All my beautiful lotions!" He straighted with as much dignity as possible while covered in cream and pronounced, "You are both fired!"

"Fired?" The women cried in unison.

"Pierre! We didn't mean to…"

"We'll clean this up…"

"We'll…"

"Pay." Jack interrupted the clamoring women and pulled out a small pouch from his pocket. Jingling it in front of Pierre he asked, "How much are the damages?"

Pierre's eyes lit up at the sound of the jangling coins, but maintained his stance and said with a sniff, "If they stay, their wages will be docked accordingly."

"But Pierre, you barely pay us as it is!"

"I give you a roof over your heads. I feed you. What more do you want?"

Giselle turned to Jack in protest. "He gives us room and board, but we have to work on the side for any spending money. How does he expect us to buy new stockings?" She held out a muddy leg for Jack to see.

"That is why I am here. I have a proposition for the three of you." Jack looked around and added, "Didn't Gibbs tell you?"

"Tell us what?" Pierre asked, busily brushing his coat sleeves with a small brush. "I did not see the good Mr. Gibbous."

Scarlett sighed. "That is what started all…this." She waved a hand at the ruined shop. "He came here with some crazy plan…"

"Oi!"

"Sorry, Jack. But it is crazy."

"Then you'll do it! I knew you couldn't resist."

"But… wait, I didn't…" Scarlett sputtered.

Giselle slapped her on a back, with perhaps a bit more force than needed. "Of course you did! It's the least we can do for Jack, him being so generous and all, paying for the mess you made."

"I made? Why you…!"

Jack leapt between the two women before they could resume their tussle. Holding them firmly by the arms he steered them towards stairs in the back of the shop. "Now, why don't you fine ladies go freshen up." He sniffed and wrinkling his nose, added, "Perhaps less fresh might be better." He gave them both a little shove and turned to Pierre. "Now, I will be needed your assistance as well. Here is what we have to do…"