Umm…yeah, this idea couldn't be left alone. It came into my head a couple days ago and kept beating around in my head screaming at me to write a fic of it. So I did. I wasn't really thinking when I was writing this, so…yeah. I don't even know if this counts.

And their names…I know there are two Syaorans, but for this fic (since the two are brothers here) I decided to use the real Syaoran's true name here. Just to clear up any confusion.

Quarry of the Loggerhead

It was eight in the morning. The morning sun shone brightly on the small middle-class house the twins called home. The car was loaded, and the engine was running. Truthfully it'd been running for about thirty minutes. They were supposed to have left on their week-long camping trip half an hour ago, and Tsubasa Li's patience was beginning to wear thin.

"Hey, Syao!" he screamed into the house. "Will you hurry up and get down here? We should've left ages ago!"

"Hold on!" his younger brother's voiced drifted down from the second floor, pleading with him. "Give me a couple more minutes!"

"I already gave you half an hour! It shouldn't take that long to say bye to everyone on the Internet! And you already said that you were looking for something; quit wasting your time!"

"Okay, okay! Fine; I'm coming!"

Tsubasa sighed irritably, checking his wristwatch and pulling at the collar of his dark green long-sleeved shirt every few seconds while leaning against the hood of the car. It was so like Syaoran to act like whenever he said good-bye to someone it would be the last time they would ever see each other. Yeah, okay; he was terrified that he could lose his friends in the blink of an eye. Tsubasa understood that. But what were the odds that that would happen, honestly? No matter how many times he tried to reassure his younger twin, Syaoran would act the same way the first chance he got. It got on his nerves.

There was the sudden sound of footsteps thudding against the thick carpet emanating from the interior of the house. Tsubasa spared a glance at the gaping front door in time to see Syaoran hurrying down the steps, wearing a neon blue polo shirt, plain jeans, and hiking shoes. His olive-green windbreaker was slung over his shoulder and he was wearing a black visor over his light brown hair. Clutched tightly in his right hand were his lucky gloves.

Tsubasa didn't really get how a pair of beat-up gloves could ever be labeled as 'lucky'. They were worn, dirty, and frayed. There were even holes on several of the fingers on the left glove. He'd learned not to ask about this – he had already had his fair share of arguments with Syaoran that erupted whenever he'd tried to in the past.

It's not like you would care! his brother had shouted. These are Dad's keepsakes! It's all I have to remember him by ever since he died! You never liked him! You wouldn't understand!

Tsubasa gave a sharp shake of the head to clear away those thoughts. He couldn't afford to get caught up in those memories. He didn't want to think about how exactly their father had died, because he knew about it more than anyone else. More than it was safe, and that wasn't a good thing – especially for someone like Syaoran. And besides, Tsubasa most likely wasn't going to come back from this outing.

Syaoran had finally made it out the door, locked it behind himself, and jogged toward the running car. Tsubasa hoped that the grumpy expression he was wearing was suitable enough for the situation at hand. He scowled as his brother skidded to a halt in front of him to catch his breath.

"Ugh, I knew I should've left without you," he groaned, tucking his right hand into the pocket of his shorts as he straightened up. "You always lag."

"Sorry," Syaoran panted. He wiped his forehead with his free arm and grinned sheepishly. "Just took a little longer than I thought."

Tsubasa rolled his eyes. "Okay, sure." He was already walking to the driver's side of the car. "Hope you didn't forget anything in there, because I am leaving now. With or without you. And I'm not gonna come back to get you."

"Don't worry," Syaoran said reassuringly. "I got everything. I swear."

"You better be." Tsubasa jerked his thumb to the passenger side with a playful grin. "Now get your butt in the car so we can leave."

Syaoran returned the smile, somehow managing to be three times warmer than his older brother's. "Okay."

The brothers loaded themselves into the car, and they were finally off.

"Are you sure this is the right way?"

"Well, that's what this map says. At least, I think so…"

"Hey, maps can be wrong sometimes. And you might not even be reading it right. Give that to me."

"Hey –!"

Tsubasa snatched the map from Syaoran's lap and examined it. He checked the freeway they were on, and glanced back at the map. He groaned in exasperation – the numbers didn't match.

"Do you even know how to read a map?" he snapped as he tossed the map back at his brother, not bothering to rationalize in his irritation. "We're on the wrong lane! This road leads to a reservoir!"

As if to prove him right, they passed a huge sign that read Jade County Reservoir – Next 3 Exits. Syaoran frowned.

"Okay…so the map was right. I was just reading it wrong."

"Damn right you were. Now we have to backtrack and the car's low on gas!"

"I'm sorry, Tsubasa." Syaoran looked contrite. "I didn't mean to take us in the wrong direction. Honest."

Tsubasa heaved a huge sigh. It wasn't fair blaming the current predicaments on his brother. This was his first outing, after all, and he hadn't really bothered to learn how to read maps because he never really saw the need to educate himself on that subject. It was also partially his own fault – he never bothered to teach his brother how to read a map despite that fact, and he admitted that it hadn't been the smartest decision to hand the map over to his twin and expect him to understand what it showed.

"Forget about it." He found a shoulder in the road and parked the car briefly to give his engines a rest. "We'll just have to turn around. Let's take a breather first."

He cut the engine and let his hands slip off the steering wheel to hang at his sides. He rested his head against the backrest of the driver's seat and stared out the window at the reddening sky – it was almost evening and they were just barely halfway to their destination. Things just weren't going the way he planned this trip. His left hand strayed to the pocket on his door, in which he fingered a folded piece of paper, turning it around and around in the interior of the pocket.

That folded sheet of stationery was not something Tsubasa wanted to think of at the moment. Its contents were restricted for his brother, if things turned out the way he predicted once they reached their destination. Trepidation gripped him. He almost wanted to turn back.

In order to distract himself, Tsubasa chanced a glance at his brother. Syaoran was studying the map with such intensity he was surprised that he hadn't burned a hole through the paper.

"Hey, Syao," Tsubasa said suddenly, causing Syaoran to flinch and look up questioningly. "If you want to learn how to read the map, I can show you. Before we take off again, I mean."

The amber-eyed youth widened his eyes in surprise. "You'd do that? Really?"

"Well, sure. It'll come in handy next time we head out somewhere and I'm behind the wheel again."

Syaoran didn't answer for a moment, but then he smiled happily, his face momentarily outshining the sun in his joy.

"Thanks, Tsubasa," he said gratefully. "I'll owe you big time for this, I promise. I won't ever let us get lost again."

The older twin had to laugh despite his worries. "No problem." Luckily for him, Syaoran was a fast learner, so he knew that educating him in this would only take a brief amount of time. "I'll hold you to that."

Syaoran threw his hands up as if to embrace the sky, and exclaimed. "We made it!"

So they had. After giving his younger brother the rundown and allowing him to be their navigator, Tsubasa had taken every direction Syaoran had belted out without questioning him to see if he grasped the concept. And he had, which was only expected of him. The younger Li wasn't called a gifted child for nothing.

They were now standing on the cliff of a canyon that cut through the granite like someone had taken a giant knife to the landscape. The canyon itself was dotted with stunted conifers and a river flowed through in the middle at the very bottom. The sun was setting over the south end of the canyon, bathing the scenery in a swath of orange and red that reflected off the cliff face and the sparkling stream hundreds of feet below. They'd managed to arrive before the sun had set completely.

"Nice job, Syao," Tsubasa congratulated him, clapping him on the shoulder before resting his elbow on it. "Just what I'd expect from my encyclopedia of a brother."

Syaoran made a face. "I'm not sure whether I should hear that as an insult or a compliment."

"Pick and choose, little bro." Tsubasa grinned mischievously. "Doesn't make a difference."

"Some older brother you are."

"And proud of it." Tsubasa jerked his thumb toward the coniferous woods behind them. "We should set up camp before it gets too dark. Don't want either one of us to fall off the cliff fumbling with tent poles in the dark, do we?"

Syaoran chuckled. "Good point. We should get started." Suddenly a dark crossed his smooth features. This didn't escape the older Li's notice.

"Something wrong?" he asked, peering at his younger sibling's expression in fear. Had he possibly noticed his wayward expression back in the car? "What is it?"

"Oh, um…it's nothing," he said absently, his face clearing as he brushed off his brother's arm from his shoulder. "I was only wondering…how to you set up a tent?"

Tsubasa blinked, thrown off for a bit, not having expected this reaction. Relief washed over him as he realized that he'd neglected to teach him this skill as well as commented, "Oh, I forgot. I didn't teach you how to do this either, did I?

Syaoran smiled slightly. "Yeah, you kind of forgot."

"That was my bad." The older sibling tilted his head in the direction of the car. "Come on, I'll show you. Let's unload."

"Sure," his brother agreed, and stepped forward to help. As he helped unpack their belongings from the trunk, however, a wary expression inscribed itself on Syaoran's face as he peered into the looming forest, this time unbeknownst to his older twin.

Three days later, the brothers had managed to get settled in the wilderness. True comfort wasn't there, but they were able to maintain a level of calmness over the course of the days. This was especially true in Syaoran's case, since he'd never spent so much time outdoors before this. Tsubasa had initially been worried, but whatever uneasiness he'd felt emanating from his brother the first day was practically nonexistent now as they trekked easily through the pine forest collecting firewood for the night.

"Hey, you're getting pretty good at this," Tsubasa noted over his armful of dead branches. "You actually found more fuel than I did."

"Well, you taught me where to look," Syaoran said in reply, hefting his own load, which was a third bigger than his older brother's. "It's not so hard now that I know where to find the next load for tomorrow night. Thanks for showing me."

"I did my best." Tsubasa sighed. "Man, I wish Kurogane and Fai had been able to come along with us. They were the ones who taught me all this in the first place. They would've been a much bigger help than me."

Syaoran nodded in agreement. "Yeah, me too. But Kurogane had to go study abroad the first weekend of summer break and Fai's up north visiting relatives. Just bad timing on our part, I guess. And don't worry; you're doing pretty well from my standpoint."

"Coming from you I'm not too flattered." The older Li noticed his brother's sour expression and revised his reply. "I mean, thanks a bunch, Syao. Real invigorated from that compliment. Honest."

The younger twin only rolled his eyes in response. They continued to walk through the woods until they heard a series of harsh screeching noises coming from somewhere in the treetops. Syaoran was so surprised that he nearly dropped his armful of firewood.

"What was that?" he asked, his voice tense as he searched for the source of the sound. Tsubasa, however, peered straight up at the crown of a spruce tree, and spotted a medium-sized gray-white bird with a black mask and beak. It was still screeching when he laid his eyes on it. He stared at it for several moments, sifting through several names he could possibly use to identify the animal.

"Look up there," he said, nudging his younger twin and gesturing in the direction of the songbird.

Syaoran stared up at the bird with wide eyes. "That's what made that sound? Geez, for such a tiny bird it's got quite a pair of lungs."

"It's called a loggerhead shrike," Tsubasa informed him after a few seconds more of pondering. "People sometimes call it the butcher bird, too."

The pale-faced youth knit his eyebrows together in confusion. "Why give a songbird such a cruel-sounding name?"

"How should I explain this…" The older Li raised his eyes skyward in exaggerated contemplation. "Because after they catch their food, they peg it on something sharp, like a broken branch or thorns. That way they can eat their food more easily."

Syaoran's face contorted in revulsion. "Ugh. That's…brutal. The name makes a whole lot more sense now."

"Yep, sure does. Anyway, let's hurry and get back to camp." Tsubasa looked up at the darkening sky and frowned. He didn't like how quickly the night was approaching. "Don't want it getting too dark before we get there. Break out the flashlight just in case, though."

"Sure." Syaoran momentarily set his pile of wood onto the ground and made to reach for his travel pack, which held their basic necessities for a day out in the woods. Suddenly the brown-haired youth blanched. "Uh, oh."

Tsubasa quickly turned to face his brother. "What's wrong?"

"I…I think I forgot my travel pack somewhere back there while I was picking up branches. It had all my stuff in it."

Tsubasa sighed. "Really, Syao? Of all the things to forget back there, it's your travel pack?"

Even in the waning light of the sun Tsubasa could see his brother's cheeks turn pink. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"Never mind," Tsubasa said. "Let's go back and grab it. It can't be too far; we're pretty close to the campsite."

"No, it's okay," Syaoran replied. "I can go myself. I know my way around this area by now."

Tsubasa raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?" he asked uncertainly. "I mean, this is your first time camping out in the woods and all…you sure you'll be okay?"

His younger brother nodded. "I'll be fine."

"Well…if you insist." The older twin set down his own pile of sticks and pulled off a whistle that had been hanging around his neck. He handed it to Syaoran, who took it and slung it around his own neck. "If something happens, blow this safety whistle as loud as you can. I'll come and find you then, okay?"

Another nod. "Got it."

"All right then," Tsubasa put a hand on his brother's shoulder. "Be careful, and don't take too long to get back."

Syaoran smiled. "No worries. I'll be back in a flash," he promised. He then headed back the way they came, picking his way around the roots of the ancient conifers and forest debris, while the older twin picked up his brother's load and made his way back to the campsite, worry panging in his chest for his younger brother's safety.

Tsubasa didn't realize it then, but that would be the last time he ever saw his brother smile.

The shrike let out its shriek once more, letting it pierce through the cold evening air.

Tsubasa stared into the crackling fire, watching its glowing embers trace an almost decipherable pattern in the night sky. The chilly night air was pressing down on his bare skin, threatening to freeze him to the bone, but he ignored it in his worry. He barely noticed the cold in thinking about why his brother could be taking so long to trek a couple acres of semi-open forest.

Could he have accidentally hurt himself and was unable to move? That's the reason that Tsubasa had given him the safety whistle. Did he lose the safety whistle somehow, and hadn't been able to alert him of anything? No, after what he told him Syaoran wouldn't dare to keep his hands off of it. Was his brother just trying to scare him? Tsubasa shook his head sharply. No, Syaoran would never do that. He was far too soft-hearted.

What happened to Syaoran?

Abruptly a bloodcurdling sound split the calmness of the night that made Tsubasa's heart leap into his throat. It wasn't a wild animal. It wasn't a tree being felled. It wasn't even the safety whistle.

It was his brother. It was definitely his voice – there was no one else here within eighty miles. Syaoran had screamed, and the sound was laden with terror and agony. The older twin's chest suddenly felt like it was being splintered apart through the middle with a rusty saw. What could have caused his brother to shriek in such a way?

The horrible wailing continued, for an agonizing five seconds before ending in a gurgled moan of pain. Horror lanced through Tsubasa like nothing else before.

"SYAORAN!" Tsubasa screamed into the woods, shooting to his feet. "SYAORAN, ANSWER ME! WHERE ARE YOU?"

The silence in the wake of the shout was more terrifying than anything Tsubasa had experienced. There was no answering voice. Raw panic had Tsubasa in its clutches now, threatening to trap him there until the end of time.

"Syao…" Tsubasa stayed frozen on his feet for a split second before making his decision. He grabbed his flashlight, which had been on top of his travel pack, and his knives, which had been stashed in the front pocket of the pack, and headlong sprinted into the forest in the direction his younger brother had gone.

Trepidation crossed the now-haggard face of the older twin, as he continued to dash in that same direction. His heart was clenched in fear at what he would find once he located his twin brother. Would he be hurt? Frozen in fright? Something even worse? He didn't want to bear the burden of another death – especially not his brother's.

Tsubasa struggled to push those fear-inducing thoughts out of his mind as he carried on. No. Think later. Find Syaoran first.

He also knew that it wouldn't matter either way. It made no difference to Tsubasa if Syaoran was hurt or not. Saving his younger brother would be the last thing he ever did.

He crashed through the sparse underbrush, trampled pine needles, broke branches – eliminated any and all obstacles standing between him and finding Syaoran as he called out into the forest for him. He didn't even care how much noise he was making in his frantic search; it wasn't like anyone would notice them out here. At least not for a while.

Tsubasa's breathing was getting hoarse and raspy from running nonstop and yelling Syaoran's name over and over. His throat burned like someone had rubbed it with sandpaper, and his legs felt wobbly. Still he refused to slow down. He put his heart and soul into his scream, which cracked in his exhaustion.

"SYAORAN! WHERE ARE YOU?"

Pain.

Agonizing pain.

The pain lanced the right side of Syaoran's face that was now streaming blood from where his eye had been despite his gloved hand clamping down on the gaping wound. This agony had smoldered through all his senses. It was all he could comprehend. It was all he saw, all he felt, all he tasted. Crimson dotted his eyesight. Warm, sticky fluid that he knew was blood flowed down his face and arm like a leaking septic tank, and his right eye socket burned like someone had set white-hot fire to it. The metallic taste of iron dominated his tongue from the cut he'd acquired when he'd bitten down on it all those times to keep himself from screaming again, which would've made his presence known to his attacker. It was all Syaoran could do to keep breathing through his shock.

He managed to raise his head several inches from the ground and, with his remaining left eye, scoured the clearing from his awkward position on the forest floor. Whatever had attacked him and taken his eye had suddenly withdrawn into the shadows again. An ice dagger of terror shot through his heart like a speeding bullet. He had no idea where his assailant would emerge from next.

"Syaoran! Where are you? Please tell me where you are!"

Surprise jolted down his spine like an electric shock. Was that Tsubasa? Was he looking for him? How had he known that he was in danger?

Vaguely he recalled that he had screamed sometime when his eye had been gouged out. Tsubasa must've heard that shout and had feared something may have happened to him. He must've some out to search for him.

But his older brother's shouts sounded tinny and extremely far away, like he was calling from one end of an outdoor football field. Or maybe that was because Syaoran's ears were buzzing again and that noise had muffled his brother's voice. Whatever the case, it didn't seem like Tsubasa would find him at a time soon enough to save him.

Syaoran desperately wanted to call out to him, to guide him in the right direction, but he had to restrain himself. If he shouted, he would give away his position to the…the thing that had assaulted him from behind as he'd trekked through the pine woods. Not only that, but what if his brother did find him? Whatever had attacked him could go for Tsubasa, too.

Syaoran bit his lip as he thought with burning regret, I'm sorry, Tsubasa. I want to tell you where I am, but then I'd be dead by the time you found me.

"Syaoran!" Tsubasa's anguished voice rang out again, and it sounded much closer this time. "Say something, please! Where are you?"

Every cell in Syaoran's body ached to comply to his brother's wishes. But it wouldn't be long. Tsubasa would soon find him and suffer the same fate he did, maybe even worse, or Syaoran himself would ultimately meet his end at the hands of his oppressor sooner or later.

He suddenly felt something clamp sharply around his right ankle, and it took all of his willpower to avoid screaming in fear. Instead he tried to fight back – he thrashed and kicked and did whatever he could to wrench himself free from this cold grasp, but to no avail. His attacker didn't even seem to notice the pain, and only seemed to get annoyed at Syaoran's continued failed attempts of resistance. So the attacker did the only thing that seemed logical to absolve this situation.

He drove a knife through Syaoran's leg and pinned it to the earth.

Syaoran couldn't hold it back this time. He flung his head back as his chest arced toward the sky and screamed in agony once more, the sound ripping through the needle-like foliage like it was wet tissue.

"SYAORAN!"

Somewhere in the corner of his hazy mind told Syaoran that Tsubasa was getting much closer to where he was. He couldn't decide if he was feeling relieved, or more frightened than before. He didn't know what to feel, or what feeling even was, if a word for that even existed in his darkening thoughts. He fought to keep his eye open through the fiery pain that was now traveling up his thigh, and even worse pain still slicing through his right eye socket. His energy was bleeding away and it was getting harder and harder to keep his thoughts clear.

A dark shadow loomed as his assailant stood over Syaoran's body. Even with the dim light of the full moon and the dark spots dancing in his eyes, the younger Li could clearly make out the gleam of the sword poised and angled high over his chest, ready to stab him through the heart.

So this was it. Syaoran closed his eye in resignation of his fate. He was going to die here, right at the moment his brother would fight his way into the clearing where he lay. Tsubasa would only see his dead body, his right eye missing, leg pinned to the earth by a knife, and a sword sticking out of his sternum. He wanted to cry, but his right eye socket spasmed, trying to release tears from an eye that wasn't there, and that twitch of muscle had refreshed the memory of the pain. He winced.

He distinctly heard the sword whistle silently through the dead-still air, heading straight for his chest, and all Syaoran could think as he processed this was that he hoped that he'd be dead before his brother got here. That way he wouldn't have to see the horror in his brother's eyes when he beheld the scene.

There was the sudden sound of footsteps that crashed through the foliage somewhere to his left. He heard a desperate scream follow after.

"NOOOOOO!"

Silence.

Syaoran's eye snapped open in shock so quickly that he was momentarily disoriented. He blinked several times in order to regain his bearings when he realized – he wasn't dead. He was still very much alive. His chest was whole and unpunctured, though he had to check multiple times. The stillness roared in his ears after that last shout. He heard something fall to the ground to his right. He turned his head to get a clearer view of it.

A flashlight.

His brain couldn't process this information at first. When his vision had cleared and he turned back to face what had just transpired, his pupil dilated in horror when he realized what he was looking at.

His brother was standing over him. The tip of the sword barely scratched the front of Syaoran's shirt. A stream of hot blood splashed down onto his chest and neck as it ran down the length of the sword.

The blade had run itself straight through the middle of Tsubasa's abdomen.

He couldn't be seeing this. He must've been imagining it. The scene that laid itself out before his eyes just couldn't be reality!

Syaoran didn't even bother to recollect his thoughts. His mind was so jumbled he didn't know what was up or down, what up or down was, if they were words at all, if words even existed, or if even his thoughts and concept of thought itself existed.

His breathing became faster and faster until he had to struggle to control it. He just kept his eye on the disturbingly still and limp form of his brother in horror. It was like staring at a train wreck – he didn't want to look, but he couldn't tear his gaze away.

His brother had taken the sword blow. Tsubasa had taken the blow for Syaoran. The blade pierced him. Not Syaoran.

The blade did not pierce me.

That terrifying realization knocked him back to his senses like a jackhammer. He now understood what had happened.

He saved my life…

The younger Li's voice rasped as he whimpered, "Tsu-Tsubasa?"

The elder twin didn't give any indication that he'd heard. Fear gripped Syaoran again so tightly he thought his chest might burst. Tsubasa wasn't…he couldn't have…was he already…?

Abruptly Tsubasa coughed, and Syaoran could feel more wetness splatter on the exposed skin through the tears in his jeans. He looked back up at his brother, who was now shaking in his weakness. Tsubasa turned his head in order to see Syaoran eye to eye, and the younger twin's stomach lurched at how dead his eyes looked – the amber orbs were now blank and glassy. His face was ghostly pale and the blood dripping from the corner of his lips stood out like a beacon.

His voice was as dead as the rest of him. "Syao…ran…are…are you…okay?"

Syaoran couldn't speak. He was still consumed by horror at the state his elder sibling was in. The pain of all of the younger brother's injuries suddenly felt distant from the rest of him, like it was on another plane of existence. All he could manage was to nod once.

A weak smile played across Tsubasa's lips. "That's…good."

Syaoran found his voice again, but it was only a stutter. "H-how did you – wh-why –?"

"…Heard you…scream…and I…followed…it here…" Tsubasa coughed again, splattering more blood, and his trembling became worse. "I didn't want…anyone else…to die…because…of me…again…"

"Wh-what? What do you mean?"

Before the elder brother could answer, he was lifted high in the air by the aggressor, still impaled by the sword. Then he forcefully buried the other end of the sword into the trunk of the nearest tree, a huge spruce, causing the older Li brother to cry out in pain. That left Tsubasa dangling like a doll three feet above the ground.

Their assailant stood there for a moment, staring at the limp body of the young teen as if pondering what he should do with it. Then he reached for the boy with his free hand. Syaoran screamed once in panic, "NO!" But he didn't hurt Tsubasa. Instead he reached toward his waist and drew two long objects from the older twin's belt.

Knives.

Syaoran's mind reeled as he managed to sit up somewhat, making his temple throb painfully in time to his erratic heartbeat while he braced most of his weight on his free arm. Since when did his brother carry knives?

But when he saw what the man did with those knives, the fact that his brother had been running around armed with blades was the last thing on his mind.

He first pushed Tsubasa's limp form along the length of the blade so that his back hit the bark of the tree, causing him to bellow in agony and Syaoran's heart to lurch again excruciatingly. Then he lifted each of his brother's arms in turn and thrust one knife through the forearm, pinning them to the tree and making the older twin look like he was nailed to a crude, twisted version of a crucifix. Syaoran's mouth was agape in a soundless scream at this sight.

But fate wasn't finished. The villain grasped the hilt of the sword, paused, then yanked it out the way a gardener would pull out a stubborn weed. Tsubasa most likely would have wailed in agony as the weapon was extracted from his gut if he wasn't half-dead already. Blood spilled from the gaping wound like a waterfall, painting the forest floor the sickening shade of crimson that it was.

Syaoran's heart tugged excruciatingly as he gasped in pure horror. Oh, God…no more…please, God; no more! I don't want to see this anymore!

The cruelty of inevitability was immeasurable, however, because the man wasn't done. He didn't put away the weapon. Instead, he rammed the blood-crusted sword through Tsubasa's chest, prompting the blood to surge out from between flesh and blade like a fountain. Tsubasa emitted a gurgled choke from his lips when the cutting edge penetrated his sternum like it was nothing but cardboard, his head snapping back before hanging loosely. His entire front was caked in blood.

Syaoran could only watch as all this happened not three feet away from him. He was too consumed by fear to move a limb. Fear defined every aspect of his being at this moment. His muscles were locked, his mind was stuck, and the severity of the situation nearly stopped his heart. His remaining eye was frozen open in raw, undiluted, all-consuming terror.

He's gonna die…Tsubasa's gonna die…it'll be my fault…he'll die…because of me…

The younger twin clenched his free hand.

No…I can't let him get killed…I've got to do something…

But what could he do? His leg was pinned to the ground by a knife and his arms felt like lead. And by the time he could do anything, Tsubasa would already be dead. He might even be dead right now.

Shut up! Syaoran ordered himself as he punched the needle-covered ground. He couldn't afford to think that way. Not if there was still a chance to stop their attacker from mutilating his brother even more.

I've got to stop him…I have to…he's killing my brother!

That thought wiped all traces of panic and rationality from his mind. His thoughts immediately switched to autopilot – stop that murderer, save my brother.

Syaoran grabbed the knife that was keeping him on the forest floor and – ignoring the spasm of agony it brought on – pulled it out of his thigh. He staggered to his feet, not paying heed to the shock of the pain. With a running leap he managed to stab the man in the neck, roaring, "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BROTHER YOU SICK BASTARD!" He landed the hit with such momentum that he could hear the bones in the man's neck snap twice. They both fell roughly onto the ground.

The man had made no sound whatsoever when he got struck by the youth. No gasp, no shout, nothing. Maybe he hadn't even been breathing. It made no difference to Syaoran. He kept the knife plunged into the man's neck, breathing heavily in fury. His knuckles were bone-white from holding onto the hilt of the knife so tightly. He stayed that way for one…two…ten…thirty seconds. The man made no move. Syaoran was now sure that the villain would not be getting back up. He wrenched his hands open, relinquishing his hold on the knife one finger at a time. He stood on his feet. Then his gaze immediately flicked to Tsubasa.

He was still hanging from the tree by the weapons that had plunged through his arms and chest. It was increasingly hard to tell in the dark, but Tsubasa's skin was so white it looked blue. He wasn't moving; not even a twitch came. His head hung loosely like a broken tree ornament. Cold fear rippled through him.

No…

He limped toward the still form of his brother in a daze. "Tsubasa…" he whimpered. "Please…don't die…"

His older sibling still gave no indication that he heard his twin's lament. It was as if he was really…he was really…

Syaoran's mind had worn so thin it was now on the threshold of the breaking point. He couldn't complete the thought. His body moved automatically.

Get him down.

Syaoran's arms were numb, but he moved his free hand to the knife that pinned his brother's right arm to the tree trunk, wrapped his gloved fingers round the metal hilt, and yanked it out. The arm slapped against Tsubasa's side uselessly. He tossed the bloodied weapon aside and pulled out the second knife. The other arm dropped like a stone on a cord. Finally, Syaoran's hand found the hilt of the sword that had impaled his brother's chest. He grabbed it with his left hand, but didn't pull.

You can't pull this out, something inside him said. You're not strong enough.

I don't give a damn. I need to pull this out. I need to help Tsubasa!

With his newfound strength, Syaoran gave a tremendous tug. The sword came out so fast Syaoran almost fell backward. The blood-coated blade clattered dully to the ground as Tsubasa's mangled body dropped off the side of the tree like he'd been hit by lightning, fresh blood spurting from his chest. Renewed panic hit Syaoran like a mace. He immediately dropped to the ground next to his brother and desperately tried to wake him.

"Tsubasa! Tsubasa, wake up! Please, don't die! Don't leave me!" he shouted in sheer panic. "You can't leave me alone! Please wake up!"

No reply.

Syaoran couldn't handle any more. The weight of the stress and shock was too much. He threw his head up at the moon and howled in grief. His brother was gone. He'd been too late to save him. He was alone.

He had no energy left. Syaoran felt his body slowly shutting down. He slumped sideways, lying prostrate on the ground right next to Tsubasa, so that he was staring into his brother's lifeless features.

Tsubasa's face was still covered in his own blood. His once-bright amber eyes were still open, but they were dead and gone – all the shine that indicated life had vanished from them. He appeared to be staring blankly into space, seeing nothing.

Syaoran choked back a sob, the memory of his brother being stabbed in the chest replaying itself over and over in his mind. Tsubasa shouldn't have died. It was supposed to have been him. Syaoran was the one who had been meant to die! But Tsubasa had changed fate and now he was the one who was gone. Syaoran had no one left.

Suddenly Syaoran felt something grab his shirt. He panicked for a moment, thinking maybe the man had only been playing dead. But the tug was coming from the wrong direction. The sensation was coming from somewhere below his chest. He looked down, hardly daring to believe it.

Tsubasa's bloodied fingers had somehow taken hold of the tattered fabric.

The one-eyed youth raised his gaze back to his brother's face. It was still blank and lifeless. But for the first time since the beginning of all this horror, Tsubasa's lips were moving. His words were indiscernible, so Syaoran moved closer until his ear was practically touching his brother's lips.

Car. Pocket. Note.

These three words left the lips of the teen before his breath cut off. His hold on Syaoran's shirt slackened. His body stiffened. His skin temperature plummeted like a stone in water.

Now Tsubasa was really gone. He wouldn't be coming back this time.

Syaoran was as bewildered as he was crushed. Car? Pocket? Note? What was the meaning of his brother's dying words? There was a note in their car? For him?

This thought chilled Syaoran to the bone. Did that mean…Tsubasa had known that he was going to die here? So he left Syaoran a final message in the event that it had happened? If that had been the case, then why did he come out here in the first place? Syaoran's head was so filled with questions he almost forgot that he was laying there on the ground next to his brother's mangled corpse.

He put his one free arm under him and heaved himself up. He took one end of his tattered shirt in his hand and pulled, ripping off a good, long chunk of the fabric. Carefully, he placed the piece of cloth over his mutilated eye and tied it behind his head. It was very crude gauzing, but he hoped that it would hold until he found help. He tore at the ragged denim around his knife wound until he ripped off a strip that would sufficiently keep the injury from bleeding too much. With difficulty, he stood.

Syaoran stared at the body of his brother uneasily. Should he leave him here? After all, the man was dead – he wouldn't try to go after him anymore. But then his sense of obligation won out. He would carry him back to the campsite, even if it caused him to fall and break a bone. He couldn't leave his brother to the animals.

Syaoran knelt, wincing as pain flared up in his leg, and closed his brother's eyes so that they were hidden behind pale eyelids. He then gingerly scooped up Tsubasa's body in his arms. Syaoran noted with initial shock that he was much lighter than he'd assumed.

The only possible reason for that, Syaoran thought bitterly, is because he's dead. It's because he lost so much blood.

He then stared at the flashlight at his feet. It was still on, but the light was now flickering feebly, as if it would go out any second. He picked that up as well and put it in his pocket. It wouldn't do much good as a light to guide the way, but this was the tool Tsubasa had found Syaoran with in the first place. He wouldn't dare throw it away.

Using the light of the moon to guide him, Syaoran slowly picked his way through the forest, holding Tsubasa close to him protectively like he was a sleeping baby.

The sun was peeking out above the eastern cliff face by the time Syaoran reached camp, painting the sky in a soft shade of pink. His heart strings tugged at him painfully at the sight. His brother hadn't lived to see the light of a new day. It was dawn, the start of another day to all the people out there, completely oblivious to the horror that Syaoran had been forced to live through and witness that night.

The youth set his brother's body in the tent on his sleeping bag. He picked up the car keys that Tsubasa had tossed into the corner of the tent a couple days earlier and walked over to their compact vehicle, his whole body shaking in anticipation.

He pressed a button on the remote and a series of beeping told him that it was already unlocked. Puzzled, Syaoran opened the door to the driver's seat and checked the door's inside pocket. He felt around – a small instruction booklet, a chewing gum wrapper, and several dusty marbles caught his awareness. He didn't find anything else of interest until he reached the far right side of the pocket, where his fingers located a thickly folded up piece of paper.

Syaoran flinched. Maybe this was it. He closed his fingers around the compact paper and pulled it out. He opened his hand to stare at it. It looked unremarkable, but Syaoran knew that his brother's final words were inscribed within. With trembling hands, he unfolded the note until it released more leaflets from the inside. He picked them up from the ground. Eight sheets of words written front and back in his brother's neat handwriting on notepad paper – there was a whole letter here!

He leafed through the stack until he found what he took to be the first page, and started to read.

Syaoran.

If you're reading this now, then I'm probably dead. If you somehow manage to find this before then, I will try to explain to you best as I can in person because words on sheets of paper won't do any of this justice.

But if I'm not there anymore to explain any of this to you, then forgive me. This is all I can give to you.

You see, the reason I decided to come out and camp here is because I was hoping to find someone.(Find someone? Syaoran thought. Who?) I didn't want to get you involved, because I didn't want you to suffer for the mistakes I've made in the past. You were angry enough when Dad was killed (Syaoran caught his breath.) and I didn't want to make that worse for you.

You're probably wondering just what exactly I'm talking about. I probably should have explained all this to you earlier, but I was afraid of what you'd say to me once I did. Would you accept what I did and forgive me? Would you shun me, hate me for that mistake? I didn't want to know, and I was terrified of finding out. So I put it off. Now you probably see that it was a stupid decision on my part. You have to get your explanation for all this happening in a letter, which is no way to do such things. But there's no way around it. I have to tell you the truth now. I owe you as much.

The reason Dad died all those years ago was because of me. (A cold sweat broke out on Syaoran's forehead. No…that can't be true.) If you don't want to believe me, then that's fine. But it's the honest truth. A simple mistake caused the chain of events that ended in Dad losing his life. I came back here to rectify that mistake. And since I'm probably not with you anymore by this point, that means I've succeeded. In order to pay for what I did, I had to come back here, where it all happened, and die at the hands of the murderer that took Dad away from us.

His name was Ashura King. (That name struck a familiar chord in the threads of his memory. But he couldn't recall who the name belonged to. This had been the murderer's name?) He was a patient at the Tokyo Mental Health Institute where Dad worked when I first saw him, back before Mom left the house. (Before their mother had left…that was a long time ago.) You might know his name from all the times Dad had mentioned him, but you probably never knew this person because you hated going outside and never followed Dad to work the way I would. But anyway, Ashura was a patient there for about five years, and his condition was said to be improving. He was a mute though, so it had been tough for the nurses there to be sure. But they said that his behavior seemed to have changed for the better, and said that he would most likely be released from the institute in several years.

Dad was happy to hear this news – he had been Ashura's personal caretaker, after all. (Syaoran's eyes widened in amazement. He had?) He suggested to the faculty that he could take him out on a trip out in the woods in order to celebrate his improvement. The majority of the nurses refuted this idea – it wasn't safe for Ashura to be in the outside world yet. But Dad insisted. He said that he wouldn't be exposed to any other human being out there in the remote forests other than him, and he was his caretaker to begin with, so there wouldn't be any harm. He managed to convince them after a bit of arguing, and he couldn't wait to begin his planning for the trip.

You remember all this going around the house, right? The way Dad would always bustle around grabbing things off shelves and shoving them into bags and suitcases? (Syaoran smiled despite himself. He had noticed his father acting oddly, but he hadn't known the reason for that.) It was because he was getting ready for that special camping trip. Mom told me that he acted like a bee that was hyped up on honey. Even Fai, Kurogane, and Sakura noticed because they came around so often. (Syaoran blinked. He must've been really slow if his friends had caught on before he had.)

Initially Dad had planned on going alone – obviously, because that was the smartest decision. But I asked him in private if I could go along. That was the mistake I was talking about. I knew very well that it was dangerous. But I wanted to go anyway. He tried to talk me out of it but…well, you know me. So I ended up going with him too.

At the beginning of the trip everything went fine. Ashura seemed to tolerate my being there. So Dad began to relax. At least…until the third day. (Syaoran's hands shook. The third day. Tsubasa had died on the third day of their camping trip. Today.)

It was evening, and it was getting darker at that point. The sun was just starting to set, so Ashura and I went out into the forest to grab some firewood for the night before it came. By that day Dad was convinced that Ashura wouldn't do anything to hurt me so he didn't come along with us. But he was wrong. As soon as we were a good distance into the woods, Ashura turned on me. He was trying to choke me to death. Dad heard my screaming and ran to find us. After that…he managed to get him off of me, but he ended up getting killed when Ashura started to choke him instead. I couldn't do anything to stop him. I was still trying to catch my breath. Even if I was in shape, I was only ten. I couldn't do anything to someone so strong.

After he strangled Dad, he disappeared into the forest. He never came out. Authorities couldn't find him no matter how hard they looked. They told me not to blame myself for Dad's death. But they didn't know anything. They wouldn't, of course. They hadn't been there when Dad was strangled. I had. So I thought, 'I have to find him myself.'

In other words...I never hated Dad. (Shock jolted through Syaoran's spine. What?) It was more like I hated myself for letting him die. I was only acting resentful whenever he was brought up because I didn't want to think about that. This may just sound like pathetic excuses to you, assuming that this letter got to you when I wanted it to.

So that's why I've decided to go back there after all those years. I want to find Ashura, and let him kill me, so maybe you won't be angry at me for what I did once you found out. Of course, I didn't count on you deciding to come with me. If I acted strange over the past several days, that was probably the reason. I was crazy with worrying over you. What if he got to you first? (It was getting harder to read the letter. His good eye was dripping tears onto the paper and smearing the ink.)

If I did manage to find out where he was and I let him take my life, what would you think if I suddenly went into the forest and never came out again? What if you somehow found out what I was up to before I got the chance? I knew for a fact that you wouldn't let me just walk into death's arms if you could. I'm still not sure what to do. Maybe once the day comes when I have to make my sacrifice, the answer will come to me, and it'll all be clear.

I was only running away from inevitability. Syaoran…promise me you won't do the same once I'm gone.

I'm sorry, Syaoran. For everything.

I hope you'll forgive me.

- Tsubasa

The brisk morning air suddenly felt much colder on his exposed skin. The morning breeze started to pick up, causing goosebumps to travel down his arms. Syaoran held the paper tightly to his chest to keep the leaflets from flying away in the wind. He knew blood was staining the papers, from both his shirt and his hands, but he couldn't care less. It was his brother's blood that covered his hands and body. In his fragile state of mind, the two belonged together – Tsubasa's final legacy.

The arctic wind blew through the canyon, making a howling sound as it swept through each crevice in the rocks and off the waters below. He could almost hear his brother's final wish in the echoing winds.

Forgive me…forgive me…

Syaoran walked to the edge of the sheer cliff face and stared out over the landscape, Tsubasa's letter still clutched against his chest.

"It's okay, Tsubasa," he whispered to the wind, a tear tracing down his cheek as he smiled sadly. "I forgive you."

Oh, God. I didn't want to write this. Really, I didn't. But it demanded to be transcribed! I just can't believe I actually did! *cries* Even I scared myself witless in the middle of this! I mean, it was easier once I got to the end, but still! Forgive the sloppiness; I was too scared to go back to fix it! I'm so sorry! D: *sits in a corner and cries eyes out* My mind is so sick and twisted ToT

If you had the heart to like this sloppy trash that is my work…thanks. *sad face*

Oh, yeah. I've decided that this isn't really a horror fic other than the graphic death scene. The basic premise of this is tragedy, so that's what I'm labeling it.