Akatsuki Ultimate Grill-A-Thon
Yes, there are original characters and OOCness in my stories (that's my new disclaimer). Don't own Naruto and I don't profit from these things. Enjoy!!
"So…I um…I have an announcement." Kisame said reluctantly.
"You met some girl that also kind of looks like a fish, yeah? Oh! Or maybe even a squid, or an octopus or…oh my god a whale! Am I right, yeah?" Deidara asked.
"No…the leader entered us in the fifteenth annual city grill-a-thon. The day of family fun, games, prizes and the quest to find the best grill recipe of 2008." Kisame read from the flyer.
"You know, I'm sorry but why the hell does he enter us in this stupid shit! I mean, remember the bake off? God…so..much…self rising flour…" Zetsu reminisced in horror.
"I know, I know but it means a lot to the leader if we enter this and maybe even place in the top three." Kisame said.
"So does this mean we have to plan all the aspects of the competition now?" Hidan asked.
"Yes, I'll get the tablet." Kisame said reaching for his organizational tablet.
"Alright, now the rules of the grill-a-thon are simple. We are going to be competing against other teams to produce the best grill recipe. Now, last year some group from the Rain country won it. Whatever we prepare we have to have enough to allow samples throughout the day as well as a judging presentation. Oh, and the recipe must have a name. It can't be something like: 'barbeque pork'. So, this takes us to the first part of our quest…who has an amazing grill recipe that will certainly place us in the top 3 finalists?" Kisame waited as no one said anything.
"Oh! I know a grill recipe, yeah. Deidara finally said happily.
"Well, what is it?" Zetsu wanted to know.
"Grilled corn, yeah!" Deidara declared.
"What?" Itachi asked him slightly disgusted.
"Yes! I so saw this on a cooking show once where this was like this guy and he put corn on the grill….grilled corn, yeah!" Deidara explained.
"Wow…honey that…is a great idea." Marisol said completely in shock as if this was the most mind blowing concept she had ever heard of.
"Barbeque chicken is so last year. Let's not cook that." Itachi insisted.
"Yeah and I refuse to cook any rib recipe. Remember how that dog chased down Tayuya last year because she smelled like the smoke flavoring?" Sasori said.
"That was so freaking hysterical! God she ran like half a mile and Kabuto was chasing after her with steak sauce for god only knows what reason." Zetsu said remembering the good times.
"Okay, okay so we don't' have a grill recipe right now. But we can talk about the other duties. We need someone in charge of the beer. We have to get our theme song, we're going to need a t-shirt design, lots of plastic forks and paper plates. Someone has to be in charge of the rain gear. Of course there's someone in charge of getting charcoal and lots of it and the most important job of all..manning the grill. I'll speak now and say Sasori that's all you again since you seem to be the only one who doesn't burn anything down at those competitions." Kisame said.
"Yeah, you mean like the year Deidara send a flaming shish kabob into the judging tent?! Oh my god we almost got kicked out that year!" Sasori scolded him.
"I didn't know it would fly off the skewer yeah! Besides I had gotten charcoal on my shirt!" Deidara tried to defend himself. He was not successful.
"Alright, well we have lots to think about. We need ice, coolers of ice."
"Oh my god please find out if the leader wants Pepsi or Coke products this year. Remember how last year we purchased Coke products and god forbid…we didn't realize he didn't like Orange Crush and that was in our purchases? Talk about hell freezing over!" Konana said.
"Yeah, we need to okay that." Kisame agreed.
"Okay, so let's start simple. Our theme song. The song that we play as our title theme for when people come to sample our stuff and most importantly of all…the song that's played when we take our food to the judges. Now, I personally thought that last year's selection of 'Do Your Chain Hang Low' was completely stupid. So, I'm giving everyone a piece of paper….write down a song suggestion and nobody put your name on it! Tobi will draw them out of this bag and we'll vote on each one." Kisame explained.
Exactly 7 minutes later…
"Alright Tobi pull out a song." Kisame told him. Tobi reached into the bag and pulled out the first paper…
"Please read it Zetsu." Kisame asked him.
"It's Jump by Van Halen." Zetsu said.
"Oooh okay, not bad not bad. I'm going to write that down no one vote yet." And next…
"This one is…Money Money Money by ABBA." Zetsu read it.
"Riiiight because Kakuzu didn't write that one." Itachi said diverting his eyes toward Kakuzu.
"What? I enjoy songs about finances!" Kakuzu said. Next…
"The Way I Are by Timbaland." Zetsu read.
"Who wrote that?" Pein wanted to know slightly irritated. I hear the leader working on his weight set constantly to that song.
"Alright, alright. This one is…Livin on a Prayer by Bon Jovi. Now that one is a classic." Zetsu said. Kisame was still busy writing.
"Hurry up Tobi draw another one so we can get on with this." Tboi picked out another song.
"Oh my god! Is this some kind of stupid joke? The theme from Bob the Builder!?" Zetsu said.
"It's a catchy tune!" Tobi argued.
"Well, now we know who picked that one." Konan added.
"This one is…Purple Rain by Prince." Zetsu said. Tobi reached in again. He seemed thrilled with his super helpful job.
"Welcome to the Good Life by Kanye West. Oh and there is a little note that reads 'Dana did not pick this'." Zetsu added.
"Takes all the mystery out of it." Hidan said sarcastically. And for the next one…
"The Hallelujah Chorus by George Frederic Handel? HIDAN!"
"WHAAAAAT? I DIDN'T WRITE THAT DAMN IT!" Hidan shouted getting very defensive. In his defensiveness Zetsu was reading the next song.
"Take you There…Sean Kingston. And might I add that there is a note on this one saying 'Deidara wrote this'."
"Deidara!" Kisame yelled at him.
"Sorry, I thought you said DO write your name on it, yeah."
"This one is Paradise City by Guns-n-Roses."
"God that is such a fucking awesome song! It's old but it's great!" Hidan said.
"Man Eater by Hall and Oates…um….sorry it was all I could think of. I know that song sucks. Just throw it out now." Zetsu confessed.
"No Zetsu, it all counts." Kisame reassured him.
"Whatever you say. This one is No One, Alicia Keyes." Tobi pulled out the last piece of paper.
"We're All in This Together…the theme from High School Musical..wow that's…wow so stupid." Zetsu said out loud.
"Okay, so now all we have to do is vote on these selections and this could take all afternoon so let's begin by eliminating the Bob the Builder theme, the High School Musical thing, and Man Eater? Is anyone against that?" Everyone seemed to agree that those selections were stupid.
"Sorry, I had that dumb High School Musical song stuck in my head from yesterday. I know it's a bad choice." Marisol admitted.
"Okay, any suggestions?" Kisame said.
"NOT the Hallelujah Chorus!" Kakuzu said.
"Oh I see how you are you little shit! In that case we're not doing that stupid money song!" Hidan argued him.
"You just say that because you want to challenge me! You know what a die hard ABBA fan I've always been!" Kakuzu yelled at him.
"Oh come on Kakuzu! You didn't like them UNTIL they made that song!" Hidan challenged him again.
"Take that back dumb ass! You know how I know every word to Dancing Queen!" Kakuzu shouted back. Hidan rolled his eyes.
"Okay, okay no ABBA…what about Livin on a Prayer the Bon Jovi song?" Kisame suggested.
"No! We are in 2008! That song is too old!" Itachi insisted.
"Well, he is right." Sasori answered.
"Yeah, I guess so even though that song is freaking sweet. Alright, what about that Kanye West Song?" Kisame asked.
"I love songs on the radio!" Tobi said out of absolutely nowhere. Everyone looked at him.
"Yes Tobi that is…just great, yeah." Deidara told him. "Yeah, I want that song." Deidara said.
"I guess that is a little better than the Hallelujah chorus." Hidan said.
"Oh my god! I so picked that one, yeah!" Dana said excitedly.
"Dana, honey you are so good at things like this." Itachi told her kissing her forehead.
"Okay, then we go with that one. Next…we talk about who's going to participate in which games this year." Kisame said flipping his paper over. This was going to be a long day.