Karma and the Nanna
by Rob Morris
GOTHAM GENERAL HOSPITAL, 2040'S
The very-former Doctor Harleen Quinzel sat and stewed as her girls were checked out.
"He hadda use that gobbledy-gook Cadmus Tech. I offered him kids on a daily basis, but he wanted to be Mister Hyde. Bad enough what I knew we did to the kid. He threw this in?"
At least neither of the 'Dees' got knocked up by any of those losers in their gang - or especially by him.
"Maybe I'll get Supes to lobotomize them with his eyes. He did that, right?"
A rather large man in a hat and trenchcoat sat next to her in the hospital lobby.
"Not really his style, don't you think?"
Harley turned and sneered.
"I think you should mind your own business and just go to..."
He was wearing sunglasses, moustache and a beard. But she didn't need to see his face.
"Makes sense you're still kicking. If everybody from the old crowd couldn't do it, how does the Grim Reaper even stand a chance?"
She wondered why he was there, but her mind was on her girls. She couldn't help it. So she made chit-chat.
"Their grandfather was a dentist, in case you're wondering. Exactly the kind of nice boy my Mom always prayed for me to find-that is, before she put the salt out for me and spat at the sound of my name. So, the new guy-he yours?"
He was as verbose as ever.
"Long story."
She was past sighing.
"How's the kid?-and yeah, I know he ain't a kid anymore, so just humor me."
Humor, she knew, had never really been his strongest suit.
"He's finally forgiven me for firing him, and he wants me to get over to Bludhaven."
Harleen snorted.
"Fughedaboutit! Nightwing-he's really bitter. I tried moving there-after-and he said what he'd do to me if I kept around. So I hid out with Pammy till she left me for some swamp dweller nerd, keeping inside a city where the most powerful people would like to use me as a mop in Arkham. I even got banned from the old henches club-a lot of them had kids. I guess I either did it right, or I wasn't worth it, once-Pud-Mista-once Napier was gone. I know, another alias he used in the mob. But he seemed to like it, and I need to remind myself how far down the rabbit hole I really went without saying his name."
He still wasn't talking much. Big surprise.
"I knew where you were. But having you live a normal life seemed like the best revenge."
Tears started to form in her eyes.
"It was all normal! I never once told them anything about who I used to be. Not my kids, not their kids. Because I wanted the psycho psychiatrist dead along with her clown boyfriend. Most all of them are right in the head. But these two? They put a large firecracker under their Dad's chair when they were three! My daughter-in-law signed up for one of the outer colonies. She will not set foot on this planet as long as her kids are around. Bats, say it straight. Did Napier do something to me, like he did to your kid?"
The big man stopped and looked around at the mention of the word 'Bats'.
"That-sort of technology is available from Cadmus. But I've already checked your granddaughters out-not remotely what I meant. Anyway, whatever drives them, it's part of them naturally."
Harley rolled her eyes.
"Great! What do I do, tell them to stare at the flowers? They're too savvy for that crap. Not that I would-wow. Nanna's little girls, alright. I'm looking to the ex for answers, when this is just genes, destiny, and plain old Karma. Worst part is, he must have known who they were, and gotten another chuckle out of it. You called it - the hired help, all of us. He even sent me on errands when he really drilled down on the kid. Chortling about secrets that I wasn't ready for. Partner, my wrinkled ass. You had partners. He had-whatever he wanted to. Most of it, I gave anyway."
She looked at him anew.
"Why are you here? Now? Gloating isn't you, and if you knew where I was, then vengeance is kinda pointless at my age-and at least you still look vaguely like you."
He pressed a piece of paper into her hand.
"It's a new experimental medication, configured for their specific type of psychosis. Harleen, get them into a program where they'll be forced to take it. I'll use my contacts to make sure it's available."
She looked at the paper like it was hope itself.
"Why would you do this? For me of all people?"
He sighed.
"I saw a lot of weirdness in my youth. One time, I traveled to a future that resembled our present, and met myself and my protégé'. It was a bad future. In it, your girls were even worse. They did many horrible things, and one that I cannot forgive. I would do anything to avert that."
She knew right away what 'anything' meant.
"Yeah, that makes as much sense as everything else. It's a deal-provided you keep Waller or anybody like her from sticking them into some little 'task force'. I been down that tunnel, and you usually don't come out the other side. Oh? And couldja maybe have your boy check on the facility they end up in? I don't need no cults or Clockwork Orange crapola. Really, those guys thrive in those places!"
Surprisingly (to her) no tough guy talk followed.
"It's a deal."
As he started to leave, she grabbed his hand.
"Wait!"
He turned and looked at her, and again he saw tears.
"I don't have enough sorries for what I did, and not just to the kid. But while sorry don't mean squat, could you let the kid know I regret-everything?"
She turned away.
"I know, he'll have a few choice words for 'Mommy', but letting him vent will probably-no."
But, sure enough, she turned, and he was gone. A slightly naughty look entered the old villain's eyes.
"Wonder what else he can still do at his age?"