Full Circle

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I've been planning to write a Lodoss song-fic, and I guess it was Etoh and Fianna's turn to have me write a story for them. Anyway the song is Full Circle by Loreena McKennit, and I don't own Lodoss or Loreena's beautiful voice. I *wish* I could sing that well!

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Stars were falling deep in the darkness
as prayers rose softly, petals at dawn
And as I listened, your voice seemed so clear
so calmly you were calling your god

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Fianna opened her eyes slowly. The room was still dark, the blankets were warm, and it was still at least an hour till sunrise. Getting up already? she asked her husband.

Etoh nodded, already dressed in his white Falis robes. Go back to sleep, your majesty. I will see you at breakfast. He slipped out of the room.

Fianna pulled herself upright. Morning prayers to Falis again. She wondered if Falis really cared if his priests were up before the crack of dawn to praise him. Somehow she doubted that the god would be so concerned with minor details.

Much as she loved her husband, sometimes it was hard to be second to his vocation.

Without entirely knowing what she was doing, she slid her feet over the side of the bed and into her velvet slippers. She wiggled her toes briefly to warm them, then stood. Quickly wrapping a robe about herself, she walked drowsily towards the door. She knew where he went for his prayers, a small courtyard not far from their rooms.

Her feet padded down the quiet hallways, until she came to a window that looked out over the courtyard. Cool air blew in through the window, and she was able to look down at her husband.

He knelt near the center of the courtyard, his eyes closed and head bowed. She could see only half of his face, but it was serene. Fianna recognized the expression, the look he wore when he was truly happy. It was almost too private a look even for her to share, and for a moment she pulled her eyes away to stare at the fading stars.

But her attention was again drawn to him as he began to chant. His voice was almost too quiet for her to hear, but somehow the walls of the courtyard drew its echo up to her and the words were perfectly clear. A simple prayer in the Holy Language calling upon Falis for wisdom and patience. So very like Etoh.

Fianna smiled to herself, then turned away. The chant still seemed to whisper in her ears. She wished she could understand.

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Somewhere the sun rose, o'er dunes in the desert
such was the stillness, I ne'er felt before
Was this the question, pulling, pulling, pulling you
in your heart, in your soul, did you find rest there?

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A delegation to Flaim. In the middle of summer. What a stupid idea it had been. Fianna cursed herself silently as she tossed and turned within her bedroll. It was so miserably hot, even in the early hours of the morning when it should have become cooler. She threw the blankets back in irritation. At home in Valis, the motion would have awakened Etoh, but she had left him behind, in Valis to look after things in her absense. She had ever y confidence in him.

But she missed him. Oh, Falis, she missed him. His quiet smile, his faint blush, his gentle laugh. she whispered into the pillow. She almost giggled. The queen of one of the most important nations in Lodoss, and here she was acting like a lovesick little girl. Shaking her head more in amusement than in disgust, she rose and stepped out of the tent. At least outside there would be a breeze.

It was nearly dawn, she discovered. The stars were growing faint, and the eastern sky was beginning to turn more lavendar than blue. The desert wind was dry enough to sharply contrast the tears that she now realized were gliding downward from her eyes.

Time seemed to slow for her, and hundreds of years passed within that sunrise. Red light fell upon the sand, and the sky was pink, even pinker than his blush. There were no clouds, only a vast shading across the sky, as one color slowly melted into another. the red become the same orange as fire, and that in turn become liquid gold. She could feel the heat steadily increasing, and for a moment it was more than enough.

She brushed at the dried salt upon her cheeks and recognized the smile on her own face, even though she lacked a mirror. Was this, she wondered, what he felt when he raised his voice to Falis?

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Elsewhere the snow fell, the first in the winter
covered the ground as the bells filled the air
You in your robes sang, calling, calling, calling him
in your heart, in your soul, did you find peace there?

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Fianna woke alone, burrowed into the blankets at the center of the bed. It was a freezing, she thought, before sitting up and pulling the blanket around her shoulders. She scanned the room, but Etoh was already gone. He must be freezing out there, she said to herself.

Still clutching the blanket around her, she rose and looked for his cloak. As she had expected, he had left it. She shook her head with disapproval. He would catch his death one of these days.

She replaced the blanket with a robe, then took the cloak. She followed a familiar path, leaving her chamber, walking down the back staircase, pausing at the door leading out into the corridor. Fianna could hear his voice, faintly. The same prayer as always: wisdom and patience. She smiled and opened the door.

A chill breeze met her, forcing her to pause a moment to accustom herself to the icy air and small flakes falling through it. Etoh's back was to her, and he had apparently not heard the door, he was so wrapped in his prayers. When her shivering had ceased, she stepped into the courtyard. the snow was falling faster, and she wondered if it might be the first real snow of the year. She spread the cloak over Etoh's shoulders, then knelt beside him and allowed her voice to join his. After all she needed wisdom and patience at least as much as he did.

He glanced at her with surprise which quickly turned into a warm smile and extended the cloak to cover her as well.

Fianna closed her eyes for a moment and thought that perhaps, maybe, she understood now.

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The third stanza may be wrong . . . I left my cd at school and so I had to type it from memory. If someone has the correct one, please give it to me and I'll fix it when I can. In any case, please review.

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