Title: The Mysterious World of Fan Fiction
Author: Jen (aka Storm)
Rating: PG
Pairings: Claire/John, Hodges/Ray.
Summary: John, Claire and Beech are the only ones in the office, finishing paperwork. What happens when John, stumbles upon fan fiction on a random search on the internet? (Family & Friends Saga Part 1)
Archive: Anywhere else that wants it, just let me know first.
Spoilers: None that I can think of, set around the early episodes of John and Claire's relationship.
Disclaimer: The Bill, and its characters don't belong to me. They never have and never will. I'm just playing with them for a bit. Can I please have John and Claire? They're not in the show anymore after all.

Author's Notes: A random one shot, that came to me from nowhere, which I've now decided to make into a series. All comments, questions and complaints in a review please. Pretty please?

The Mysterious World of Fan Fiction

It's a quiet Wednesday afternoon and John, Don and myself are lazing around the office just finishing off all of our unfinished paperwork. All of a sudden I'm jolted out of my thoughts when John bursts out laughing, spitting coffee all over the desk and computer in front of him.

"What's so funny mate?" Don asks intrigued.

John coughs and splutters to clear the coffee from his lungs before saying, "Just this thing I've found on the internet, come and take a look."

Don walks over to John's desk and stands behind him, reading the contents of the screen from over John's shoulder. It's not long before Don too, bursts into laughing fits. "That's funny mate, real funny, but it could never be true."

"What couldn't?" I ask approaching them curiously. It's not often that both John and Don burst out laughing when they're supposed to be doing paperwork.

I copy Don's actions and read the content of the screen from over John's shoulder, trying to work out what they both think is so funny. Once I reach the bottom of the screen, I struggle to keep a straight face while saying, "I don't know Don, I think it's very realistic, you'd make a good bent copper."

Both Don and John let out a snort of laughter. "And I suppose that your the one who's CIB and trying to trap me?" Don asks.

I take a sip of my coffee before answering, concerned by how close to the truth this conversation is going.

"Next you'll be saying that Deakin's gay and Meadows is sleeping with the superintendent's wife," I joke with them.

"I didn't know Brownlow was married," comments Don.

"She was being sarcastic, wasn't you Claire?" John explains for me.

"Was I? Remember Don, they've got eyes everywhere," I say mysteriously, before returning to my desk to continue with my work, leaving John and Don to continue messing about.

A few minutes later I ask, "Who wrote that John?"

"Who wrote what Claire?"

"That story you were reading, or better still what is it?"

"Well according to the site name it's known as fan fiction and it was written by someone known as Superintendent Hodges."

I burst out laughing at that, the mental image of Hodges writing something like that is just laughable. "Somebody has got a very vivid imagination," I state, trying to stop my hysterical giggling fits. "What's the site address?" I ask. This is something I've got to investigate further.

"I'll email it to you," he says, copying the URL into his email program.

A few minutes later I receive the email on my computer and open it up, to take a look at the site. The first thing I do is look at the profile of the author. Upon reading it, I notice it sounds just like Hodges. What are the chances of that?

Meanwhile at CIB Headquarters, Superintendent Hodges is sitting at his desk typing furiously at his keyboard. Someone knocks on the door and then walks into the room and over to stand behind him.

"What ya doin' Ste?" the person asks, staring at the computer screen.

Hodges turns to look at the person before replying with, "I was just updating 'The Life and Times of Don Beech'."

The End.