I DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR ANYTHING NARUTO-RELATED
The Most Terrible Thing That Ever Happened Again
'The Chosen One'
(Naruto #2)
On the first day of what the Hidden Leaf Village's historians would eventually refer to as the "Bloodless Years," its people stood in two large sections in front of the newly rebuilt Great Hall, cheering and yelling in joy and celebration.
Today, they were going to anoint a new Hokage, and there would be a village wide celebration for the end of the wars and other trials that the shinobi world had just gone through immediately afterwards. The previous month had been a somber one, full of funerals and eulogies, remembrances and memorials, hushed words, candlelight vigils, and mourning. Now, there was to be bright colors, music, laughing, and yes, dancing in the streets.
Uzumaki Naruto was uncomfortable in his new robes of office. Kakashi-sensei was already whispering in his ear something like "remember, you too are mortal," whatever the hell that meant, especially since he kinda wasn't, but whatever. That was Kakashi for ya.
Naruto made his way through the speech that Sakura had written for him without fumbling anything too badly. She was standing near the bottom of the dais, her hair blowing in the slight breeze, smiling. Her best friend, Ino, was beside her whispering into her ear, and the both of them started laughing together, their faces reddening in mirth.
Man she's pretty.
All the rest of his friends were there. All around him, people who'd made his life harder, who'd ignored him, who'd let him suffer as a child were now cheering him, loving him. That strange, dark-haired girl who made him uncomfortable was in the back as well, looking at him weird.
Him. The village pariah. The loud-mouth ninja. The twerp. The monster. The unwanted.
Naruto Uzu-freaking-maki.
Could you believe that?
Damn straight.
Believe. It.
Naruto briefly wondered what Sasuke would have said if he had been here to witness the festivities. But not too long. He'd already learned his lesson.
Best to leave the damned to their own devices.
As for the future...
Last night, Naruto had gone over his plans with Kakashi-sensei, Lady Tsunade, and the Kazekage of the Hidden Sand Village, Gaara, through the puppet which he'd had sent as a gift.
It had been creepy at first speaking to the life size, life-like mannequin, but after Naruto had learned to let the doll wait a few seconds before responding to it or to wait for a response in turn, things had progressed well. Gaara had been full of good advice, and had let his newest peer push forward his own agenda without too much nay saying. After all, Naruto had been the instrument of victory in recent times, not he.
The village elders had been consulted, and then informed that any advice they had on how to make the Hokage's plans work was welcome. Anything other than that would not. After all, they hadn't really contributed to recent times other than to set in motion the problems that had cost everyone in the village much time, money, stress, misery, and blood.
And blood was the costliest price anyone had to pay.
As the speech finished, and the enthusiastic crowd cheered, Naruto raised his arm for a moment of quiet. The jubilant cries had gradually died down, and Naruto grinned to himself. Nobody was gonna see this thing coming.
Kakashi-sensei leaned into him and muttered, "Are you sure you want to do this? She can be unpredictable when she's caught off guard."
"Relax sensei. I know what I'm doing. If I don't do this right now, she's always gonna have a new way to say no. This way, she's on the spot, and she's got no choice but to accept. Anything that happens after that is just face saving."
"As long as you know what you're getting into." Kakashi's wry tone, probably the only one he had, always managed to annoy and reassure Naruto at the same time, just like it was doing now.
"Whatever."
Turning back to the crowd, Naruto began to speak again.
"And now that I finally have the chance, I'd like to let everyone know just how I feel about a certain lady out there."
"I've known her since we were children. We were in all the same classes, knew all the same people, and took all the same lumps. She's been on one of the most successful teams in all of the Hidden Leaf Village's history. Her prowess in battle has become legendary, and she turned out to be absolutely critical in the final battles we just won. And she's real pretty."
Sakura turned beet red, and glanced around in a panic.
There's no way this knucklehead...
Naruto was still going. "And after talking it out with the Kazekage of the Sand and some of the other big shots around here, I've decided to ask her to marry me. Right here, right now."
The crowd had started murmuring and buzzing to itself as their new Hokage had started his aside, but now they were all clapping and whistling in response to the admission.
Hey, a new Hokage, the end of a war, a city-wide party AND a proposal? Right on! This was gonna be the best party Konoha had ever seen!
As the crowd cheered and cat-called, Naruto, fueled by their positive reaction, bit the bullet and finished.
"So, with all that out of the way, Ino, would you marry me?"
Ino squealed in delight and bounded up the stairs, jumping over the last pair as Naruto caught her and swung her around in joy by his one good arm.
The crowd roared and applauded in appreciation for what they were seeing. It had been evident to EVERYONE that this was the way things were SUPPOSED to be. Right?
Hinata, hovering in the back of the crowd (as always), ran crying from the gathering, unnoticed. As she did so, she accidentally doused herself in oil and then stumbled into a candle.
And thus did Hyuga Hinata, rejected heiress to the Hyuga clan, overlooked by the man she had come to love, and tragically never really supposed to be more than a foot-note in the Wikia of the Universe, lit herself aflame as she fell screaming in anguish from the tower overlooking the Hidden Leaf Village.
So passed Hinata, daughter of Hiashi.
And the Hyuga-clan got along without her just fine until someone presented them with the bill to dust her ass off the street.
Sakura, turned to stone by the announcement, watched Naruto and Ino kiss passionately surrounded by well-wishers. She stumbled up the steps and broken by disappointment, asked the blond shinobi, "Why?"
"Why? After all the years together, the meals together, the battles, the pain, the time? After the training, sharing heartache, crying tears of joy, of sorrow, of relief? After all that we've done together, after losing Sasuke, especially after losing Sasuke, and all the things that went with it? After all the years, and moments we shared, after all of that, when the waiting is finally done, after the journey seemed to finally be over, and we could finally say what we wanted, no, what we needed to say, and do the things we were meant to do all along, with the ones we were meant to be with, how, HOW could this be what you chose to do? Why? Why, for all that it meant to everybody, and to us?
"How could you do this? Why would you do this!?"
Naruto drew himself back, and with a fang-bearing, twisted, malignant rictus of sardonic satisfaction on his face, yelled in her face:
"Why? BECAUSE FUCK YOU, THAT'S WHY!"
The End. Deal with it.