Author's Note: This story is about the events of Original Song onwards from Blaine's point of view, inspired by the song "What Kind Of Fool". I don't own Glee, of course. If I did, it would be called "Klaine", and wouldn't appeal to nearly as many viewers. Hope you like it, and please read and review. Thank you!
Blaine wandered toward his room after practice, feeling strangely at peace with the world. The realization that he cared about Kurt as more than a friend felt completely right, as though everything had suddenly settled into place. As though he'd always seen the world through a blur, and now everything was clear.
His contentment was soon spoiled by the fear that he had messed things up with his best friend, his obliviousness damaging them beyond repair. Kurt's words echoed in his head. " Sometimes I feel like we're just Blaine and the Pips..." Yes, Kurt had been jealous and hurtful, but he had a point. He slumped on his bed, agonizing over every mistake he'd made in their relationship. Relationship? he scoffed at himself. There is no relationship! Because you're an idiot! He rolled over and buried his face in the pillow, berating himself as soundly as was possibly without causing physical harm. Then he just lay there, staring at the ceiling.
Blaine jumped up, struck by a sudden thought. He smiled when he realized who sang the song that had been stuck in the back of his mind. Barbara Streisand. Of course. He began to sing, for once without an audience.
There was a time when we were down and out
There was a place when we were starting over
We let the bough break
We let the heartache in
Stupid, stupid idiot.
Who's sorry now?
There was a world when we were standing still
And for a moment we were separated
And then you found her
You let the stranger in
He hadn't even known Rachel. It had been a huge mistake to get drunk, but even worse to continue the debacle that had begun with kissing her at that party. He understood now that Kurt, though he'd been extremely insensitive, hadn't meant to criticize his misguided "experimentation"... he'd been jealous. He felt oddly possessive of Kurt now, thinking that he'd welcome back happy, smiling Kurt over the snippy, hurtful one he'd been faced with lately. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Maybe if he yelled at himself enough, it would make up for his recent mistakes.
Who's sorry now?
Who's sorry now?
What
What kind of fool
Tears it apart
Leaving me pain and sorrow
Losin' you now
Wondering why
Where will I be tomorrow?
Forevermore that's what we are
To be, without each other
It would be completely idiotic for him to not be with Kurt. It just didn't make any sense. He lo- he wanted Kurt. Oh god, he wanted Kurt. Wanted to be with him. In every way he could think of. Not that he'd really thought about anything like that yet... There had been that one dream... But he'd quickly brushed it off, thinking that it didn't mean anything. Of course not. It doesn't mean anything to wonder what your best friend's lips taste like, to catch yourself staring at him, almost breathless with - with wanting. With needing. No, those were completely normal feelings to have about your best friend.
We'll be remembering when...
Memories of the two of them flashed through his head, laughing at the coffee shop, smiling together... and that one time, that he had almost forgotten about. A moment that had been charged with tension, until he had broken it. Their faces had been so close together, he could have kissed him... but he didn't. He missed his chance, because he refused to see the truth about what Kurt meant to him. Because you're an idiot. And he hates you now.
There was a time when we were down and out
There was a place when we were starting over
We let the bough break
We let the heartache in
Who's sorry now?
Who's sorry now?
Who's sorry?
I am. I am so, so sorry.
What
What kind of fool tears it apart
Leaving me pain and sorrow
Losin' you now
How can I win
Where will I be tomorrow?
Was there a moment when I cut you down
Played around
What have I done
I only apologize for being as they say
The last to know
Everyone had known but him. He was sure of that now. The surprise on their faces when he said that it was Jeremiah he wanted to sing to on Valentine's Day, the knowing glances the others had exchanged when they saw him singing to Kurt. Everyone. And they didn't tell me. He was slightly annoyed with his friends, but quickly brought the blame back to himself. Because they thought you were intelligent, he chastised himself. They thought you had the faintest clue what you were doing. Which you evidently did not.
It has to show
When someone is in your eyes
What kind of fool
What kind of fool
Tears it apart
Tears it apart
Leaving me pain and sorrow?
Losin' you now
How can I win
Where will I be tomorrow?
What
What kind of fool
Tears it apart
Leavin' me pain and sorrow
Pain and sorrow
Losin' you now
How can I win
Where will I be tomorrow?
If I lose you, I will never win. Never.
Forevermore that's what we are
To be, without each other
We'll be rememberin' when...
There was a slight cough behind him. He spun around to see Jeff leaning against his door frame.
"Singing to anyone in particular?" the blond Warbler asked.
"N-no," Blaine stammered, his composure broken for once.
"Uh huh." Jeff waited for him to tell the truth, then prompted him again. "Something you want to get off your chest?"
Blaine sighed and sat on the bed heavily. "I can trust you, right?" He didn't know Jeff all that well. Sure, they sang together, but he didn't have any really close friends in the Warblers. Except for Kurt, of course.
"Sure. I won't tell anyone, whatever it is. If you don't want me to. Or I can tell everyone, if you so desire," he joked. "And I've been told I give pretty good advice." The other boy gave a shy, reassuring smile.
Blaine decided to trust him. "Well. I lied. Obviously. I am singing to someone." He waited for Jeff to interrupt, but the other boy just gestured for him to continue. "I'm sure you can guess who."
Jeff nodded. "I don't want to assume anything... but Kurt, right?"
"It's that obvious, huh?" Blaine sighed.
"Pretty much." Jeff gave him a considering look. "How long have you liked him?"
Blaine groaned. "Forever. I'm just a complete idiot, and I didn't realize until now."
Jeff gave him a sympathetic look. "None of us could understand why you hadn't asked him out."
"I can't understand why, either." He glared at his hands, as though they had done something wrong. "And now he hates me."
"He doesn't."
Blaine shook his head. He knew differently. "How do you know?"
"You haven't seen the way he looks at you, have you?"
"What do you mean?"
"He just... he watches you. All the time. When you sing, when you talk... whatever you're doing. He follows you with his eyes. Not in a creepy way," Jeff hastened to explain. "Just like..." He seemed to be trying to find the right words. "Like he can't look away."
Blaine blinked. "He does?"
"Yeah." Jeff swallowed, a little nervously. "And you watch him too. Well, not exactly. Not in the same way," he corrected himself. "You just sort of... angle yourself around him. You sing to him."
Blaine cast his mind back, trying to discern if this was the case.
"Before he came... it was like you had no direction. I mean, you've always been a great performer," Jeff said quickly, not wanting to cause offense, "but you're amazing when you sing to Kurt."
Blaine took this in. It was probably true. It seemed like his body had always known, it was just his brain that took too long to catch up.
"So," Jeff said, suddenly businesslike. "What do you want to do about it?"
Blaine thought of what he could to make it up to Kurt, and maybe, just maybe... make Kurt fall in lo- like. Make Kurt like him. Well, not make him. He didn't want to make Kurt do anything. He was perfectly capable of making his own choices, and Blaine was stupid to think that he could ever deserve someone that... wonderful. Beautiful. He smiled ruefully. Opinionated. Ambitious. Perfect.
"I think," he said, "I have a plan."
A/N: Here is the song, although I'm sure most of you have already heard it.
http: /www . youtube . com/ watch?v=OSPG6l9gdxA