Call of Duty- and Kisses

SUMMARY: Spain and Romano have 'phone-sex' while playing COD. Spamano/Romain\RomaSpa USUK if you squint. Spain England Romano America

A/N: I don't even like USUK, but England sounded like a better choice than Belarus for this story.

"Yo, people, you guys should totally come to this party I'm hosting!" Alfred said with a wave, talking to any nation that would listen after the meeting. He hadn't actually gotten much of an audience. Arthur was reluctant to even join, not wanting to show how bad he actually was at Call of Duty (not that he'd say that! He would just prefer a sword over a gun any day...). He was, however, excited. Spain- and therefore by extension, Romano, had decided to join. He might have been awful at gaming, but judging by the way Spain worked an iPhone, the Brit already knew he was going to win.

England and America waited until Spain and Romano had made it home before setting up the team match, having played a few rounds a little before to warm up. After receiving the call from the Spaniard, Alfred began setting up the match. Team Deathmatch at first, just to get Arthur and Antonio started. Apparently Lovino was close to Alfred's skill level, as this was "the only real fucking game my idiot brother owns."

It went well, to say the least. The death threats from the two pirates were kept at a minimum, although Spain did take a few uncalled for jabs at America. The English team came out on top the first round, but the "Latinos" (which Romano continued to deny) pulled through for first the next round. Alfred set up a free-for-all match the next round, deciding to let back all he had as well.

"Haha, Lovi, I got you!" Antonio's voice came through eagerly on the phone. It nearly sang again when bullets whizzed past his head, the Spaniard having taken cover in the next room over, "missed me missed me now ya gotta kiss me!" Alfred laughed until he heard the soft smack of lips from the other side.

"Hey, gross nasties, stop making out in the middle of playing! We're still on a board!" He heard Lovino sigh before getting shot by the Italian.

"Fine, hamburger bastard, we won't kiss again..." A faint chuckle followed, definitely Spanish in accent.

"Sí, but I guess we'll just have to say what we'd do Lovi. Since this is taking up some of our play time~" at the last bit Alfred saw Arthur frown, grabbing the phone and shouting into it, "if I wanted to hear sex talk I would have gone to the frog's house tonight!" He gave a slightly (but not really) apologetic look to Alfred and set the phone back down, searching for someone to kill.

"Lo siento, Eyebrows, can't guarantee Francis hasn't rubbed off on me~ just like how I'm going to rub my cock all over your delicious ass later, Lovi~"

"Mm, lets not jump straight to sex, idiot. You know I l-like your teasing-" another shot to kill the American before Lovino grinned.

"Oh you don't just like it, you love it. Especially when I tease your little nipples-"

"Will you two apes shut up!" Arthur shouted through the phone. But no, they didn't stop. The couple continued to tease each other, back and forth about what they were going to do later. The lust in their tone was nearly seeping through the phone, and Alfred swore he could hear the Italian's blush as well. Antonio himself let out a few moans, fake and real, and the sound of ruffling clothes could be heard through the line.

"I told you no-"

"-can it!" The "Latinos" shouted from the other side.

Miraculously, Lovino pulled out first, Antonio tying with Alfred.

And again.

And then the last time Alfred finally got first, but by this point they could hear the kisses again. It was obvious Spain had ditched his control in favor of pleasing Lovino, and the occasional jerk of the Italian's character gave away that he was only half paying attention.

Arthur clicked off the phone, Alfred booting the two shortly after both had left their controllers unmanned.

"How-"

"What just-" the blondes stared at each other.

Lovino heard the dial tone ring through and smirked against Antonio's lips, "We can take it back to the bathroom now, amore~"

"Bueno. I don't know if I could stand having Eyebrows actually listen to our love any longer~"

A/N: it's cracky, I know~