Author's note: The idea of this story was contributed to me by my great and good friend whose pen name is Ithildin. She helped me come up with Remus' love interest's name, the title of the story, the summary, and the whole plot…I, however, have to make up the story. So give credit to Ithildin. THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME!
Disclaimer: I, like many of you, do not own Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Lily Potter, or any of the Harry Potter characters…they belong to the incredible J.K. Rowling.
Summary: Remus Lupin has lived a cursed life from such a young age, always being shunned away by both muggle and wizarding worlds. But there was one person who didn't make his life so terrible…but made it a blessing. —This is one of those flashback stories. I know its kind of clichéd with the whole "lost love" thing, but I really needed to write this story.
A part of my story takes place in Remus' fifth year at Hogwarts and it has some parts that are in the Order of the Phoenix. If you haven't read the entire fifth Harry Potter book or haven't reached the chapter twenties zone, please be reminded that there is some part of my story that I got from the fifth book.
Other than that…feel free to enjoy the story!
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Remus Lupin was slowly packing his things. He had recently resigned his position as Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Recollecting the events that had took place the previous night, he sighed slightly.
He couldn't believe he wasn't the only Marauder; there were two he could still keep contact with. There was still Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black—one Remus always thought didn't kill his two best friends, Lily and James Potter, and the other he had always believed did…He suddenly didn't feel alone in the world anymore now that he knew Sirius was back…But all his loneliness started to flood his heart once more.
As he passed his desk, carrying an assortment of things, a book on the top of the stack fell to the ground. Cursing as he felt an added weight drop onto his foot, he dropped the items he carried onto his desk. Crouching over to pick up the book he had dropped, he froze and then fell to sit, as if gather all of his emotion at the sight he saw.
He sighed heavily as he looked down at the opened photo album that lay on floor. Pictures were scattered around the book. Pictures of Sirius, James, Peter, and himself on the ground, pictures of various places in Hogwarts, pictures of Lily and James together, and pictures that brought back painful memories to his mind and tears to his eyes.
"Eszti," Remus whispered.
He stared at a picture of himself and a girl with long, light brown hair. He had his arm wrapped around her as he held her closely to him. They sat on the grass in front of the lake on the Hogwarts grounds. They both were wearing swimming suits, and had just spent time swimming in the lake with all their friends. Behind them, Sirius, who was only wearing a pair of swimming trunks, ran off with a bathing suit in his hand. Lily was chasing after him in anger, only wearing a towel. James followed closely behind them, apparently cursing Sirius for taking his girlfriend's clothes. Peter wasn't in the picture…he was taking it.
Remus smiled slightly at the image he held in his hand as his mind wandered back into those glorious years when he didn't feel so alone, when he wasn't the only Marauder he knew that was alive, and when he had found his first and only true love…
*~*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*~*
Remus sat under the beech tree, staring down at the book he was reading, not wanting to go and tell of James and Sirius for tormenting Severus Snape once again…
"Leave him ALONE!" he heard a female voice shout out.
Good, Lily's here, so I don't have to tell them off, Remus thought in his head as he continued to look down at his book, not wanting to look up in guilt.
"All right, Evans?" James' voice filled Remus' ears.
James…Remus' head rang.
"Leave him alone. What's he done to you?" Lily said once again.
"Please don't answer that one, James," Remus whispered to himself.
"Well, it's more of that fact that he exists, if you know what I mean…"
Oh, Merlin's beard, James…just shut up, Remus wanted to shout at his friend. But instead, he kept his mouth shut and frowned at it. He did not want to look up. All he wanted to do was sit there, block out every word of the scenario that took place in front of him, and wish that James and Sirius would stop their actions.
"You make me SICK!" Lily shouted, making Remus snap back into the conversation.
"Evans! Hey, EVANS!" Judging by James' call, Remus determined that Lily had just left. "What is it with her?"
"Reading between the lines, I'd say she thinks you're a bit conceited, mate," Sirius told him.
"Right, right—" James said. "Who wants to see me take of Snivelly's pants?"
But Remus didn't want to. He quickly stood up, grabbed his things, and ran off to find Lily. He wanted to convince her that James wasn't as bad and as arrogant as she had thought. He stormed off into the castle and found her and another girl rounding into the library.
"Lily! Wait!" he called out to her. She turned back and stared at Remus, who was bolting towards her.
"What is it, Remus?" she asked impatiently.
"Look, about James…" he breathed in deeply. "He's not as bad as he seems…I know he could get a little carried away and…"
"A little carried away?" Lily asked, apparently appalled by Remus' choice of words.
"All right, so he can get really carried away sometimes, but you have to understand that…"
"Remus, don't try to defend that prat," Lily spat out.
"Well, Lily, look, I have to. James is my friend and I wanted to…"
"You know, you should've stopped both James and Sirius from doing that to Snape."
"Well," Remus said as he rubbed the back of his head in guilt. "See, I couldn't…"
"Why couldn't you? You're a bloody prefect, Remus!" Lily angrily stated. "As a prefect, it's part of your duty to stop people like James from doing stupid things like that."
"I know I am a prefect, but I just couldn't…"
"Why not?" Remus didn't answer. Lily scoffed at him. "You're almost as worse as both James and Severus…"
Before Remus could defend both himself and James, Lily stormed off once more.
"Oh, don't mind her. She's just confusing herself, again," said female voice. Remus turned to look at the girl who had just spoken.
"Sorry, but confusing herself?" Remus asked her. The girl bit her bottom lip, held her books closely to her chest, and decided to walk up to him.
"Yes, confusing herself. See, Lily sort of likes James. She won't admit that she's head over heels in love with him, but every time she sees James acting like a git, she hates herself for liking him. And then she wonders why she likes him in the first place," Lily's friend explained.
"Oh, I see what you mean. James likes Lily, too, you know," Remus said.
"Well, he makes it quite obvious," the girl giggled.
"I'm Remus Lupin, by the way," Remus introduced him.
"I know. I've—er—heard your name being mentioned a couple of times whenever Lily speaks of James. And when Lily said your name a while ago, I figured you were Remus Lupin," the girl said, not seeming to forget to mention her name. "Oh, I'm Eszti Blanchett, by the way."
She turned her head away as her face reddened. Remus smiled at her and held out his hand.
"Nice to meet you," he said brightly.
Eszti turned back to look at him, her face fading into a tone of pink. She took his hand into hers and said, "You too."
Her eyes had wondered down at the book Remus held in his left hand. "Studying for Transfiguration, also?"
"Yes, I am a little concerned about it," Remus answered truthfully.
"So am I…would you like to study together in the library?" Eszti asked, her eyes gleaming with him hope.
"Sure, why not?" he answered as they made their way to the library wing while talking different things.
::So how do you think of it so far? Please read and review…flames are accepted, just as long as they are constructive criticism:: --lots48