Please review! I love Rufly and I really want some feedback on the story!

Rufus heart was broken. His wife had just died. It wasn't really unexpected, but it still hurt like hell. The cancer had slowly killed her the past 2 years. Her last good day was Dan's and Serena's wedding last fall. Now the funeral was over, he really felt alone. Jenny left for London yet again; Dan and Serena went to the Hamptons. Serena was due in a couple of weeks and they wanted to enjoy the last days of Indian summer. Sure Serena had asked him to tag along, but he didn't want to ruin their last holiday with just the two of them. He remembered the time he and Alison spend together just before Dan was born and it was the happiest they had ever been besides the birth of their two children. Serena was a good girl, he couldn't have asked for a better daughter-in-law. Before she left she made sure somebody would bring him food daily. She was a thoughtful young lady and she would make an excellent mother to his first grandchild.

Lily found herself before Rufus' apartment yet again. When Serena told her Lisa had died, her heart went out for Rufus. She had wanted to pay him a visit ever since. She just wanted to be there for him, but she didn't know if he even would want to see her. Sure they were friendly again, but her choosing Bart over him and him sleeping with Ivy had broken something between them. She had practically thrown herself into William's waiting arms. She always wondered what would have happened if her and Rufus tried to make it work again, but she couldn't risk getting hurt again. William was a safe choice, she knew he could never hurt her the way Rufus did, because she didn't love him the way she loved Rufus. With William she knew she could expect him cheating on her anytime, but when Rufus and Ivy were together it felt like she would die of a broken heart. When she found out Rufus had a new partner, she just stayed with William and tried to move on. Well, her relationship with William recently ended. He proposed, but she didn't want to get married again. They had a big fight over it and he practically admitted that Ivy and him had an affair. At first he just wanted to use Ivy to tear Rufus and Lily apart, but they had been sneaking around for years now. Strangely, Lily wasn't really hurt by his confession, she was just ashamed and wondered what people would think. She didn't care, she couldn't care anymore. She calmly packed her stuff and had been living in Chucks old penthouse in the Empire ever since.

Rufus decided to go out for a walk, maybe even visiting Lisa's grave. He put on his favourite grey coat. He remembered his ex-wife Lily hating the coat. He wouldn't allow him to go out in it. But that was his Lily, well not his, William's. When he first started dating Lisa, he loved that her and Lily were very alike. Than after he heard that Lily and William were back together, he just stayed with Lisa. Their relationship wasn't really like the one he shared with Lily, but she was the love of his life. He shared a great relationship with Lisa too, but he soon realised they were just friends depending on each other to fulfil their physical needs from time to time. He had wanted to break up with her, but she got diagnosed with cancer and he couldn't leave his sick girlfriend, which would make him a monster. He always wondered what it would be like if he had tried to make things work with Lily again. He knew when she chose Bart and later William over him, she was building walls. When they were together her walls seemed to tumble down and Lily hated to be weak. He hurt her by not choosing her side in her fight with Ivy and later even sleeping with her. He knew Lily wouldn't open herself up for him anymore, she would shield herself with bastards and wrong guys just like she did after they first broke up.

Lily had come to Rufus apartment for the past 5 days to bring him diner. She could imagine he wasn't in the mood for cooking after his girlfriend died and she didn't want him to starve. She had brought him some soup and chilli. She knew how much Rufus loved chilli. He made it for her on special occasions. The one she bought could never be as good as Rufus' home made, but it was the thought that counted. She was in her hall, thinking about going up and visit Rufus herself, but something stopped her. Part of her wanted to see for herself that he was alright, but another part didn't. She thought seeing Rufus would make her feel things she didn't want to feel. She was just asking the guard if he could bring the food to Rufus when he said:

"Well, miss, why don't you give it to him yourself, he's right here now'.

When she turned, she stood face to face with Rufus.

"Lil, what are you doing here", he said. She was the last person he expected to show up. She felt butterflies when he used her old nickname. Nobody had called her Lil in years.

"I was just bringing you something to eat. You're probably not in the mood to cook now. I'm sorry about Lisa, you must really miss her. I wanted to come and pay you my condolences but I didn't know if you wanted me to. But here, take this food, sorry to bother you", she babbled while giving him the soup and chilli. She gave him half a smile and turned to leave.

"She must really care for you, she brought you food every day for the past week but didn't want to come up and she didn't want to say her name", the concierge said.

When he heard that, his heart fluttered. It was Lily who brought him food and took care of him. After all this time, she still cared for him. Leaving the food on the front desk, he stormed outside.

"Lily", he shouted, "Lil".

When she heard him calling after her, she turned around. She couldn't let him cause a scene, the polite thing to do was to talk with him. At least that was what she tried to convince herself of. She really wanted to talk with him.

"Lil", there it was again, her nickname, "thank you for the food, I really appreciate it, all of it"

She didn't only love the nickname, but the way he said it, as if he was gently caressing her. She was only fooling herself, he was mourning, he only used her nickname for old time sake.

"Why don't you come up", he asked.

"I don't want to interrupt", she answered him quickly, but there was nothing she would rather do than coming up.

"Since when, Van der Woodsen", he said smiling, "besides, I'd love the company".

She gave him a beautiful smile and decided to come with him. He'd love to spend time with her and she'd love to spend time with him. When they entered the building, he took the food she brought him and they went upstairs.

"You have a beautiful apartment", Lily said, "totally different than your Brooklyn loft".

"It was all Lisa", he answered all of a sudden looking said, "I would imagine you liking it. It's on the right side of the city".

"Come on, Rufus, you know I loved your loft. We have some wonderful memories there", she said genuinely.

Rufus smiled at her, they indeed had made some wonderful memories in his old place.

"So, what did you bring me this time?", he asked.

"I figured you might want some chilli, I know how much you love it", she answered, "it's not home made, but it's from the Thai at the Empire you love, so it's the next best thing I guess".

He loved that she knew him so well. "Well, I know his portions are enough for the two of us, so make yourself at home and I'll get us some plates".

During lunch, they talked like old friends. She mostly let him do the talking. He was happy he had someone to talk to about Lisa. At some point he even let himself sob in her arms. She just let him sob for as long as he needed to. Her heart went out to him. She hated to see a loved one so broken. When he was done sobbing, he asked her how she had been.

"Well I've been alright, busy going to events and stuff", there she was again, building walls around her.

"I've really missed you, you know", Rufus said.

"I've missed you too", she admitted blushing.

All of a sudden a beautiful blue guitar caught her eye.

"Is that…?", she said smiling.

"Yes, Lil, it is. It's the guitar you gave me for our wedding anniversary", he said.

He couldn't believe she remembered the guitar.

"You kept it!", she said.

"Of course, I loved the guitar and you gave it to me. I have to admit, I haven't played it since", he stated, "come on, let me play you something".

He took the guitar and started to play a familiar tune. It was Rosewood, the song he once wrote for her.

He was in her eyes she remembered the song.

"Well after we broke up, I wrote another strofe", Rufus said, before he started to sing again".

"There's a little rosewood casket

Resting on a marble stand

With a packet of old love letters

Written by my true love's hand

Go and bring them to me, sister

Read them o'er for me tonight

I have often tried by could not

For the tears that filled my eyes"

When Lily heard the lyrics, she started to tear up. When Rufus finished the song, she got her coat and said:

"I have to go."

Rufus saw how upset she was and he didn't want her to go out on her own.

"Wait, Lil", he said kindly, "Let me walk you home".

"The Empire is not that far", she said before leaving his apartment.

He knew better than to go after her. If Lily wanted to be alone, it was best to just leave her alone. He wondered why she referred to the Empire as home. He decided to call her later and asked if she was ok. He knew that something was bothering her and he cared for her, so he wanted to make it all right.

Outside Rufus apartment Lily broke down. For the first time in years, she allowed herself to cry. She cried over losing Rufus, the love of her life and being humiliated by William yet again. She needed Rufus. She realised she wanted nothing more than to be with him again, but she couldn't go after him, his girlfriend just died. She couldn't be the Ice Queen of the Upper East Side anymore, she wanted to allow herself to finally be happy again, to finally give herself a real partner again. For the first time in years Lily felt helpless and Rufus was the cause of it again.