Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, nor any character's within this story. I make no profit, though I do amuse myself, and occasionally others which suits me just fine.
Ridiculous Retaliation 2: The New Batch
Knick Knack Paddywack, Give the Dog a Bone...
Kiba could only look on in mute shock as his faithful partner Akamaru vigorously humped away at some random bone the pup had dug up.
"This is... insane." the young Inuzuka muttered as Akamaru started howling.
Kiba could only translate the yips of pleasure into 'I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love!'
"Oi! Kiba!"
Said shinobi looked up to see Naruto running toward him.
"Yeah? What's up Naruto?"
"Old man Hokage sent me over. We need you and Akamaru for a mission." the blonde said.
"Really? What's the mission?" Kiba asked with inerest. It had been awhile since his last, and he was ready for some action!
"Someone vandalized the Yondaime's grave! They stole his femur!" Naruto shouted wildly.
Kiba's face lost all color as he looked at his pup.
"Akamaru! Where did you get that bone!"
END
I'm Talkin' to the Man in the Mirror...
So, that's how the kage bunshin works..., Sasuke thought as his sharingan copied Naruto's trademark jutsu.
He smirked as the final peice of his plans came together. Now he could fulfill his dreams, and it was all thanks to Naruto.
Not that I'd ever tell him that!
He slipped away to his favorite training ground, a clearing in a secluded part of the forest surrounding his home village of Konoha.
He scouted the area to ensure there were no witnesses then flashed through the handseals.
"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"
Sasuke stood face to face with himself, and smiled. Now he knew why it was a kinjutsu. That took a lot of chakra, and he only created one bunshin!
"No matter," he said to himself. "I only need one for my purposes."
"That's right," the bunshin said softly as it reached up to stroke the original's cheek.
"Now I have the only one worthy of my affections. Myself!"
END
Ay, Ay, Ay, I'm Your Little Butterfly...
"Tiny salmon swimming in a stream..."
"Kisame."
"Yeah Itachi?"
"If you continue to sing that song, I will kill you."
The nuke-nin of the Hidden Mist Village snapped his sharklike maw shut with a clack.
"Ouch! Bit my tongue a bit..."
Itachi glowered at his partner for a moment.
"Good."
"That was mean Itachi! Not even a hint of sympathy."
"I slaughtered my entire family, and you think I'm going to show you af all people some sympathy? I think you need to try fresh water. I think the salt is frying your brain."
Kisame wisely kept his mouth shut. Or maybe it was the mangekyo sharingan staring him dead in the eye that did it for him. Either way, Kisame managed to stay silent for the remainder of the trip to Konoha.
-ooo-
Itachi and Kisame sat in a barbeque joint on the edge of Konoha. Why they were sitting there Kisame didn't know, but they fat kid in the corner had caught his attention.
He'd never seen anyone shovel food away that quickly before in his life! And he just ordered another three plates!
Kisame had found his soul mate!
Itachi didn't notice the hearts in his partners' eyes. If he did, he mighthave introduced the fish-like man to his close, personal friends, Pain and Suffering.
Kisame got up and walked to the table that the hefty kid occupied.
"I like you kid. You're comin home with me!"
Choji Akimichi nearly choked on a chunk of spare rib.
END
A/N:Ah, another dose of complete randomness. My good deed for the day is done. Hope you enjoyed the chaos.