With everything finally put to rest following a number of false accusations and corruption but also my promotion to captain that I had not yet accepted as I was unsure of where my heart lay following what happened. There was one more important matter I had to take care of or it was one that I insisted I took care of and that to bring her home.
So with a bag packed, I left for the port taking a ferry back to Scotland I planned a small detour before voyaging on to Ireland where I would meet the body of my wife and would accompany her to her final resting place. It felt refreshing as I stood on the shores, feeling the sea air brushing across my face it was here we planned to meet in advance of them flying with the body to Ireland. The plan was that I would voyage three days ahead of the body, to visit family and to spend some time back home before flying on from Edinburgh to Dublin where I would journey onwards to Lahinch with the body which would follow in a hearse.
As we came together with breakfasts in hand we enjoyed the view along with each other's company but before long it was time to part ways well at least for now. So we each hugged in turn, then picked up my bag and boarded the ferry leaving with a wave. Mia had been useful since returning to New York as she put her legal skills to use during the process of arresting the corrupt officers. Lauren and her boyfriend Benji would also join us later, as they was busy with work and couldn't get away.
Now in case I hadn't said or you just forgot, I met Mia a few years ago where we had a causal relationship where if we met there was for either stress-relief or in the mood for no strings attached fun we would have sex. But this came through working with her on joint FBI cases. Now there was no commitment for either of us, and we weren't in a relationship and there was no feelings involved or at least back then. We lost touch after a case and the last I heard was that she had gotten married and later had her first baby which was a girl. So imagine the shock of when she turned up in Hawaii and recognised me well thought she did as I disappeared just before she took a second. Talk about awkward, let alone risky in the case I was still working despite being dead.
A case made more personal when I found out that it was her daughter she was looking for and after seeing a photo. She recognised her daughter despite being taken off the case due to it being personal she threw the rule book out of the window and headed down to Hawaii to find her on her own without any back-up or authority. When I learned this I began to help her where I could by putting my newly made contacts to work and sliding to her without arousing suspicion to the Frobisher's that I was a cop. I almost on a couple of occasions blew my cover but down to my quick thinking kept things in check.
I pulled her back by her 'pigtails' when I could see she was putting her career on the line and was in need of reminding of where the line in the sand was. I may have been undercover but I hadn't lost my sense of what was right and what was plainly wrong. She knew that I could see the hate/anger in her eyes but relented as she realised the sense I was talking. It wasn't long after she closed that case, that I realized my time in deep cover was nearly up as by then I had managed to cause some disruption within their network but maybe it was time to have an overdue conversation now they never made face-to-face with the mercenaries on their payroll to avoid any problems down the road if the police or federal agents came calling.
Now during my time in death, I'd been making further into the case of my wife's murder and the others that had followed or came before. When I finally one night by a stumble in the dark, came across the Frobisher compound and began to make as infrequent visits as possible to get a good an angle on their operation and way in for myself at a later date.
I would later return to New York, under an assumed name or through some other way but with a very simple goal in mind. To end all the madness that begin with my wife's murder by bring the murderer to justice by any means necessary and lines were definitely gonna be in the dust.
Returning to Edinburgh
It was a long voyage from New York to Dover on the ferry, I took time to walk on the outside of the ferry taking in the air. I took the time to contemplate things, as I knew that when I returned that I would have some questions to answer in regards to my actions and conduct on the case. I had stowed my bag in my cabin before I took a wander to get a feel for my surroundings.
It felt great to be back among other people after so long, being on the run and all the things that followed. As we left the harbour, I stood on the main deck taking in the air as we left I took a long look at the city as it disappeared into a blur. The hours slowly flowed past and I took the chance on a couple of restaurants for lunch and dinner whilst in between I took naps or walks around the deck. But a nightmare returned when I tried to sleep, every time it was me and someone would kill me in different ways and I always woke up startled and sweating.
Maybe the psycological effects of being shot on that rooftop took their toll much harsher on my mind. In it's wake had re-opened old wounds that I had long since buried as I made my peace with. The nightmares had been plaguing my mind for the past few weeks since my return and finally putting the murderer of my wife behind bars. Taking a moment as the sleep deprived mind after once again trying to get at least a little rest. But after a hopeful hour or more of sleep in order to keep myself as sane as I can. I did think about going back to my psychatrist but couldn't face it or rather felt unready to so I kept hoping the nightmares would go and things would return to normal.
It was 2am the following morning when I woke up again, stumbling I put my trousers back with my boots and stumbled out with my doorkey, wallet along with my mobile in my pockets. I found a bar that was fortunately to be still open at this hour after checking with the barman on duty "Still serving…" I asked slightly groggily taking a stool to stop myself from falling over "Yes Sir, for another hour so at any rate…" with a smile.
"A small whiskey please.." I asked
Arriving In Ireland
I landed in Dublin, in the late morning at the airport, Little did I know that when I arrived at the airport that there would be someone waiting to meet me who should be still in New York. So after I had departed the plane and walked through the arrivals lounge. It was there that I saw her standing with her daughter at her side and their cases both of them bearing a grin as they saw me. Over the past year things had gotten better between them slowly after she rescued her from the trafficking ring with that they took the time to reconnect with each other and this break was what they needed. So we drove up in the rental car together, with a little awkward silence with the radio playing in the background [Joey Clarkson - Home] as we reached the road to HannahJo's hometown but as soon they found something to talk about as I concentrated on driving.
As we headed down to the small Irish seaside town of Lahinch in County Clare on the Liscannor Bay. We arrived at least an hour in front of the car that was bring her body home, I had been to her hometown a few times whilst we were together when she brought me over to meet her family and for family gatherings along with the occasional christmas or new years party. We have even done a few christmases and Valentine's in Dublin which were just magical as we spent time on ourselves and it lifted our spirits and the love in our hearts for each other.
The car was driven up to the church, where she lay until late afternoon for people to pay their last respects with the casket half opened. Alongside the body, my friends/colleagues followed in tow by our daughter Laura and her boyfriend Benji.
But for the time being I was proud that she came, we spent what remained of the day with her family and as I talked to some of her old friends and family my heart and spirit lifted after I heard some of the tales but they were her experiences that made her the woman she was and the woman that I love.
Later the party moved to the local pub, where a local fiddle band were playing, there was a moment of silence as I entered the pub but the band kept playing until the landlord indicated he wanted to say something to the whole pub. "Tonight we are gathered here to celebrate the passing of a daughter of Ireland… band if you could play her favourite song…" As if prepared a sombre yet folky song took hold. Before the song begun, the bar raised their glasses of beer, wine or juices in a form of silent respect. Then the band begun to the play the song as the bar was still standing for a few moments, We made our way to the bar to get drinks before ascending the hill to her burial site which overlooked the town. We were also joined in the pub by her family and friends, some that couldn't make it to the house or had arrived from out of town. Before I knew it was time so myself and Mark along with a couple of her family left for the church to prepare to carry her body for the final journey.
Even though it was something that I had hoped or rather implied that I gotten through some of the pain was still fairly raw for me. I flashed back to the moment on the roof as to whether I made the correct choice amongst some of the more beautiful memories that we shared. So I closed the lid for the last time, smiling that she was finally at peace and the madness was over. We carried her coffin to her burial site, in silence as 'Mountains of Mourne played' as we walked up the hill towards the prepared site where we slid the coffin down ready to be lowered.
I should add here, that the burial that took place in New York was an empty casket burial in order for those who couldn't attend the final burial in Ireland so they could say their goodbyes. The ceremony began with Father Kinsey reading a prayer as the coffin was slowly lowered into the ground. I looked around to see some of the family of my wife who had come together to say goodbye whilst the prayer was read then in turn we threw soil into the ground and I tossed her favourite flower into the grave on top of the soil. I took a few moments along with my friends to mourn her passing as I turned I looked to the top of the mountain to see a shadow of a figure. Which disappeared after I turned away and back again to ensure that I wasn't going mad or in other words losing my mind completely.
So I put it out of my mind, then returned to what was at hand and the family and friends as we headed down the mountain after the headstone was placed. The rest of the ceremony was a beach party that was spent drinking and regaling of tales whilst the band from the pub continued playing music. Who at this stage had been joined by a female fiddle player who was by all accounts a very talented player when she took centre stage for a song that she had written about the time she was playing the pub circuit of a tale of fiddler who was asked to stop playing in order to protect his fiddle which glowed when he played so he became the 'Phantom Fiddler'.
As I mingled between family and friends. I finally got a chance to talk to her and found out her name was Evie Jackson through chatting I found out more about her as I praised her on the fabulous musician she was. I found she had lived all over Ireland when she was little then settling in Lahinch when she was in her teens and starting out in music by playing in any venue possible. When she finally got her chance she travels across the globe playing in bars and small venues even some low key festivals. In a moment when I gotta few moments to myself, I smiled as I saw the cross of family and friends with their stories that somehow made up the woman I loved.
It was then down by the shoreline that I now I realised was someone I knew. So I took a sip of my drink and then wandered down to the shoreline where the shadow stood. I turned and faced her "Well hey you ..." I smiled as she chuckled but to anyone this could be construed as weird or that was insane or plainly drunk which was true to a degree. "Hey you…" I looked around me to see what was going on but no-one was looking in my direction. Something we both knew but let slip by the wayside.
In that reckless moment, we kissed for what seemed a lifetime but also had the same electricity of our first from our very first date. "I will always love you, but I'm happy that you've moved on and I like her too.. [looking over my shoulder to Mia] But now my love is the time for me to go!" I smiled but it was a moment filled with both happiness and sorrow as I watched her walk away into the sea then vanishing into thin air. At this point, some people were looking and thought I was crazy as James held me by the shoulder "Are you okay?" as a tear dropped from my eye into the sea. Then turned to him and reassured "I'm fine!" I smiled joyfully as I wiped the tears away and returned to the party as people slowly into the late hours began to drift home.
But on the shore of Lahinch stood us as a group that had become a family over the last few years along with my daughter Laura and Benji where we raised a glass in her memory before long we were the last standing on the beach. This was as the sun finally set down behind the houses it was here that we looked out across the bay, when Father Kinsey appeared behind us as we saw out across the bay as lights began to appear along the shoreline "Look!" pointed Jess as one light after another began to shine. I was startled and feeling so emotional that I almost started crying "Was this you!?" I asked around that was when Father Kinsey stepped in "It was me… I passed on the word … Maybe the word was good enough." he smiled as we all stood as we watched as stars came out and we each remembered a special moment with her.
At this point my wandered to a song that I had heard that would feel to hit the spot which was 'Birdy - People help the people'. We each took our cues to leave with myself the last as I watched on as the last fires burned out in celebration of a daughter of Ireland coming home to rest for the final time.
I stayed in Lahinch for a few days afterwards, in order to spend time with her family for that little bit of re-connection but more to be away from the city to get some perspective. So I saw my friends off by taking them to the airport. I spent time with her family, including time sat by her grave watching the world pass by.
I sent word a day later, that I would be passing on the promotion and moving onto new territory which was joining my new love at the FBI. Now we were never partnered together,