John. -SH
John. -SH
John. -SH
JOHN. -SH
What do you want you bloody git?! -JW
Bored. -SH
So? What do you want me to do about it? -JW
Something. -SH
No. Find a way to entertain yourself. -JW
Fine. -SH
I found a rat in the street... I wonder what happens when you microwave it. -SH
. . -JW
But Joooooooooohn. -SH
No! Leave it alone! And get it out of our flat! -JW
Spoil-sport. -SH
Sherlock? Where are you? -JW
Try and find me. -SH
Jesus, Sherlock... -JW
Here's a hint. I'm somewhere in the flat. -SH
Sherlock, stop acting like a child. Come out here. -JW
No. -SH
Why the hell not?! -JW
You're going to yell at me. -SH
Of course I am! YOU BLOODY BLEW UP OUR MICROWAVE! Now come out here. -JW
Come and find me. -SH
Dammit, Sherlock... -JW
Fine. Whatever. Stay where you are. I'll find you. -JW
Very well. -SH
...
How the hell can you hide so well?! You're like 6ft tall! There aren't very many places you can hide! -JW
You'd be surprised. -SH
Goddammit... -JW
Do you want another hint? -SH
NO. I'll find you myself! -JW
Okay. -SH
...
...
...
...
OKAY. WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU. -JW
"Here."
"JESUS CHRIST!"
We're out of milk. -SH
Oh my god, how the hell do we run out so fast? -JW
SCIENCE, JOHN. -SH
Sherlock, Mycroft is trying to contact you. -JW
Can't. Busy. -SH
Doing what? -JW
Thinking. -SH
Fine. At least tell your brother to stop texting me. He's filling up my inbox.-JW
When are you going to be home? -SH
Later -JW
Nope. Now. I need you. -SH
No Sherlock. Im at work. -JW
Yes. -SH
No. -JW
Yes. -SH
No. -JW
YES. -SH
NO. -JW
I'LL TELL YOU NEXT WEEK'S LOTTERY NUMBERS -SH
That didn't work last time. What makes you think it'll work this time? -JW
It was worth a shot. -SH
Just get home. -SH
Why should I? -JW
... Because you're curious. -SH
And it'll be dangerous. -SH
"..."
Goddammit. -JW
We need some hydrogen peroxide, bleach, rat poison and some cucumbers. -SH
What the fuck? Why? -JW
SCIENCE, JOHN. -SH
John, make a note that bananas are flammable. -SH
What the hell did you do?! -JW
I put a banana in the microwave. -SH
WHY? -JW
SCIENCE. -SH
STOP SAYING THAT. -JW
1 picture message -JW
John. -SH
Yeah? -JW
I believe you sent that to the wrong person. -SH
Sent what? -JW
The picture... -SH.
...
SHIT. -JW
YOU DIDN'T SEE THAT. -JW
I may have actually... You're showing quite some skin there, John... -SH
SHERLOCK I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL MURDER YOU. -JW
You wouldn't murder me. You'd be to sloppy of a murder to hide my body well. -SH
Plus, I'd haunt you for the rest of your life if you executed it poorly. -SH
Why the fuck do you want to have a naked picture of me anyway? -JW
Ever heard of "blackmail"? -SH
If you wanted to blackmail me you'd send everyone I know all the sappy love poems I write. -JW
Of course, but this one is different. -SH
Why else would you want it? -JW
...
...
No. -JW
What? -SH
You? -JW
Still not seeing what you mean. -SH
You're keeping it to... -JW
If the next word you type is "masturabte", It'll be me doing the killing. -SH