Chapter 1

Have you ever been so utterly drunk that you had no idea where you were, and even the slightest coherent function was beyond you? Well, I was having one of those days.

"Cummm onth, donth duu theth…" By now I was sure that the thief that was currently taking everything I own was not going to pay me much heed, but that didn't stop me from trying. "Pweetty pwease?"

Suddenly, the shouts of men interrupted our little party, but it was a bit too late for that, as I was down too nothing but rags at this point. As the shouts grew closer, the thief got up to leave, but not before delivering a swift kick to my head that dipped me slowly into unconsciousness as the shouts converged on my location.

I woke up to the rumbling of carts on a road, and the unrequited god of all hangovers. I was vaguely aware of men in the cart with me, and one seemed to be trying to communicate with me, though that task was still beyond me. As we entered a town, I finally managed to notice the clothes of the men around me. One was in rags like me, but that wasn't what scared me, as one of the men was in a stormcloak vest, and another was wearing expensive cloths befitting a jarl… with a gag around his mouth. I used Valen's training to put away the pain for a second and figure out what the hell was going on.

As of right now, I didn't know where I was and was completely broke. I was tied up in the back of a cart with 3 other men, who were now getting off of the cart to be checked by an imperial solider. One was gagged and resembled what descriptions I had heard of the traitor Ulfric, and another was a stormcloak, no doubt about that. As of now, my situation looked pretty bleak.

As I stepped off the cart and contemplated my chances of escape, my brother in rags yelled something and took off, only to be cut down by arrows. Thus, my plans for escape withered and died. By the time the soldiers turned around to me, I was coherent enough to hear the solider ask me who I was.

"I am Baron Stormgate, and apparently the unluckiest drunk on the planet. Nice to meet you." Gotta love my amazing wit.

"What should we do captain, he's not on the list."

"He's goes to the block anyway, with the rest of the prisoners."

"Aye aye captain, to the block prisoner. At least you'll die here, in your homeland."

That at least solved my location issue. Skyrim, huh, it had definitely been a while. All of this went through me with a dull buzz, as I was still trying to get over the fact I was going to die.

The next minute went by in a blur, with my suspicions of the rich mans identity being confirmed by a man in golden armor. At least I could brag I had been killed with the great Ulfric Stormcloak. I watched numbly as a stormcloak was beheaded, and my name was called. I hardly noticed the roars in the distance.

Finally, as I lay there facing the executioner, I made a promise with anyone who was listening. If I made it out of here alive, I would dedicate my life to cleansing Skyrim. And who would have guessed it; my prayers were answered… by a bloody dragon! It tore through the sky, landing on the tower directly in front of me, roaring an oddly familiar language into the sky, calling down fire and explosions. During all of this, I promptly got to my feet, looked around, and screamed at the top of my lungs. It was very manly, I assure you. The stormcloak who had been in the cart with me grabbed me by my scruff and forced me into a tower where Ulfric and a few other stormcloaks were waiting.

At that point, my mind shut down at the absurdity of what was happening. Though the next few minutes are blurry, I'm certain that I was a beacon of strength and bravado as I traveled through the town. Just… just take my word on that, ok? I finally snapped out of it when the solider from before, who I now know to be Hadvar cut the ropes that were restraining me.

"Looks like we're the only ones who made it prisoner. Go grab some armor and weapons from the chests, we'll head put in a minute." As I searched through the chests, I found some light armor and cheap iron swords, plus a key. As we started to head out, voices crept to us from inside a room. "Hear that? Stormcloaks, maybe we can reason with them." My voice was still hiding in the recesses of my mind, so I only dumbly nodded.

As we entered the room, I noticed two stormcloaks talking near a door, and a dead one in the corner. Mere seconds passed before they pulled out there weapons and attacked. The fight lasted only seconds as Hadvar expertly cut them down with his swords. It was a sad end for such brave soldiers, but I did notice one was carrying a war hammer, which was much more my style. Big, loud, and proud.

We repeated this event several times more, meeting only two more imperials along the way. I eventually recovered enough brainpower to question Hadvar as to where exactly we were. I learned we were beneath Helgen, and the closest town was Riverwood. Finally, we reached the end of the exit, only to find it guarded by a mangy looking bear.

Like an idiot, I rushed in and to receive a nasty bite my arm as a eward. As I finished it off, I could feel a disease worming its way into my blood.

"Stupid wildlife…" I muttered under my breath. Not long after, we found the exit to the cave. I hesitated only a second as I contemplated what I might find as I traveled this strange, forgotten home of mine. Enough of the suspense I determined, and took my first step into Skyrim…

End Chapter 1