by Shuvcat
Rating: PG for...uh, because no one reads it when you rate it G, I guess. Buffy's dressed in semi-drag, how's that?
God, why?? Why do I listen to Garbage when I'm trying to write Buffy?! No good can ever come of it! People just get hurt and bloodied and broken!...
Sigh...it's a screamin' bad songfic inspired by the pending Buffy musical, no spoilers. You know they won't have Faith in it, so here's her share of the wacky musicalness. Yes, this is what I'm doing when I should be working on my real fics....
Song is Breaking Up The Girl, found on Garbage's new cd, Beautiful Garbage. (C'mon, if I could actually write songs don't you think you'd have a Faith/Mayor revue cluttering up the net by now? Does anyone want that?? I think not!)
Disclaimer: All Buffy folk owned by Joss. All Garbage lyrics owned by Garbage. {These} denote changes to the lyrics for continuity's sake.
My {dear} you must be careful
They've a million ways to kill you... Enter Mayor Wilkins' ghost, on the other side of the camera. His form is flickering like a grainy televised image. He takes Faith's other hand and pulls her into the darkness, away from Elizabeth, whose streetlamp goes dark. He pulls Faith close and leads her in a very nice waltz: Mayor~~ In this dangerous world
There's an art to growing old-- The Mayor twirls Faith once, pulls away, grinningly hands Faith the knife. Mayor~~ Take your chances
Magic happens. Buffy emerges from the darkness between the two. She grabs Faith's wrist. Three hands joined at the knife. Buffy jerks Faith away, the knife still clutched in Faith's hand. Buffy~~ One mistake's all it takes
And your life has come undone-- Buffy gets herself between Faith and the Mayor, points her finger warningly at the Mayor, who's started to follow after them: Buffy~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl... Scene change: Close-up on Buffy's face, back off to show her standing on top of a cemetery stone. She's now dressed in a cute little pantsuit, with a hat and tie to match. Buffy~~ It's a drag
Know it's hard-- The Gang is all around her, twirling in circles around her. Buffy slaps her own thighs, sliding her hands up her body. Buffy~~ But you're tearing her apart-- Buffy stretches out her arms. Xander and Giles grab them, help her to the earth. She and the gang stalk toward Mayor Wilkins, she points at him again: Buffy~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl... Meanwhile Faith has bailed, tired of being fought over. She skulks down the street, against the shop windows. She tries to be tough, eyes searching the darkness. Faith~~ I am afraid that there's much to be afraid of-- She turns toward one window, which is light. It's televisions, all showing a different face from her past, Elizabeth, Kendra, Gwen Post, her Mother....Faith touches the glass. Faith {sadly}~~ Here today and gone tomorrow... Elizabeth's face appears on the television: Elizabeth~~ Don't end up in the gutter-- Kendra's face appears: Kendra~~ Just like the one before-- Gwen Post's face appears: Gwen~~ You're just the same-- Now Buffy's face appears, cold and hard: Buffy~~ You're such a loser. Faith's face looks extremely depressed before it's plunged into abrupt darkness. The store window no longer holds TVs; now it's a glitzy, showy scene, glittery blue curtains and Mayor Wilkins spinning jauntily, looking quite dapper in a sequined game-show-host jacket. Mayor~~ One mistake's all it takes-- The Mayor grabs Faith's hand, pulls her onstage with him, as brightly colored demons dance wildly around them. Mayor~~ And your life has come undone-- He spins around and shoots his finger at Buffy who has climbed in after them, stopping her in her tracks. Mayor~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl... He almost cups his hand around and over Buffy's face, but Buffy ducks away, spinning too. She grabs Faith's hand, trying to talk some sense into her, trying to bring her back to the good side. Buffy~~ It's a drag
Know it's hard-- But the Mayor dances on the outside of their little pairing, taunting: Mayor~~ But you're tearing her apart-- Buffy and the Mayor face off, angrily fighting with/dancing around each other. Buffy, Mayor~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl Buffy repeats as, in the background, the Gang and the demons join in: Buffy, Mayor, Gang, Demons~~
Gotta let her go because you're breaking up--the gir-rrl... Faith has run away again while the fighting is going on. The bridge of the song plays as a mass of demons chase after her on both sides of the street; she shoves through them. All her sins and history flash before her eyes. At last she fights herself up a fire escape to the top of a building, and stops at the edge, just as the demons and Buffy, the gang, and the Mayor reach her. Faith turns around throws out her arms as the spotlight hits her: Faith~~ One mistake's all it takes
And {my} life has come undone She slinks her arms down her sides, very sexily, then shoves her hands out toward the crowd, in particular at Buffy and the Mayor at the front: Faith~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl She grabs Buffy's hand, jerks her so that she flies to one side. Faith~~ It's a drag
Know it's hard She grabs the Mayor's wrist and throws him to the other side, her arms are now crossed: Faith~~ But you're tearing {me} apart She throws her arms out, raising them to the dark moonless sky, screaming out her rage. Faith~~ Walk away, 'cause you're breaking up the girl! The Mayor joins in, grabbing Buffy's hand and spinning with her in the center of the shot, glaring at Buffy: Mayor~~ You're breaking up the girl-- Buffy spins around too, hand gripping his, glaring back at him: Buffy~~ You're breaking up the girrrrl-- The crowd joins in, all dancing and spinning in suspiciously Britney-Spears-esque choreography. Buffy and the Mayor grab each other and dance/fight, spinning in glorious mutual hatred, as Faith watches from the ledge. Fed up with the whole thing, she takes a step back, dropping off the roof. Slow-mo as Faith falls...into soft focus, blurring fade out. Blurry fade in to an extreme close up of Faith's scowling face as she dreams in her jail cell, remembering what has transpired to bring her there. Back off to see the Mayor and Buffy standing over her bed, gazing wearily down at Faith's sleeping form, as the last "aaa-ahhh" fades out. Many battles have been fought over her, but no one has won her yet. Fade to black. End.