Author's Note:

Warning: Contains MalexMale. LavixAllen

This is my first time writing a fanfiction. Please let me know how I can improve :)

I do not own D-Gray Man.

Oh, and Rated M.

Enjoy.

-Pinkie xoxo

His breath was hot at my ear, the words came clustered and hard to understand. I couldn't make out the need in his voice as his touch came down, firm and demanding. I tried to pull back, but found the warmth of his face on mine, instead. His forehead was pressing gently on mine, his hands on my face and his lips searching down the middle of my face for mine. I tried to pull away. I tried. I was not successful.

Lavi woke from this dream in a cold sweat. A warmth pooling in his abdomen, and anxiety clutching him in the chest. He sat up, and rubbed his cool hands across his hot neck. The sudden cold felt comforting in this reality. He knew he was awake, that he no longer felt the heat and need of the persona in his mind.

"Christ, just what the hell was that?"

The dream had been a reoccuring one for a long while now. He would find his subconcious self becoming attatched to an unseen persona in his dreams. He wanted to find the face of this person, and confront them. He wanted to know why he felt this way. Why he was so keen to be close to this person. Why his heart froze whenever he awoke.

Lavi pushed himself off of the bed, and searched for his eye-patch. He snapped it into place on his face and felt the surface of his night stand to find his bandana. He tied his hair just out of his face and sighed. He sat on the edge of his bed and pulled his leather pants on. He shoved his feet into his boots and found a shirt off the floor. He shrugged into his jacket and yawned. He opened the door from his room and grimaced at the bright light shining into his face.

"Another day... let's get this over with."

Lavi trudged down the halls with his hands behind his head. He smiled warmly at all the friendly faces he passed, as was his habit. But the memories of the dream he kept having were haunting him. He was not paying attention as he bumped right into someone.

"Oh, sorry there!" His sheepish grin greeted by another one.

"Oh, hey Lavi! Couldn't see you over my steamed bun! Jerry made red bean buns and they are fffntistic."

Lavi peered down at the slender boy. Allen. Of course he was speaking with his mouth full, as was the normal habits of this boy. Lavi laughed and turned Allen around. Allen looked up at him, bits of the bun still sticking out of his mouth. Lavi pushed the remains into the boy's mouth and laughed at the shocked expression on his face.

"You were going to eat it anyway. Just thought I'd help" Lavi put his hands up in mock self-defeat. Allen's cheeks rose up in a pink flush. Lavi noticed this small detail, and cocked his head to the side, a small smirk playing on the edges of his mouth.

"Ne- Allen, what's got your face all red?"

"N-nothing L avi! Where were you headed?"

"Cafeteria, wanna come?"

Allen nodded and turned on his heel to head back into the direction he had just come. Lavi laughed quietly to himself.

Maybe, if I can keep myself distracted, I won't drive myself insane with that dream. I'll just harrass little beansprout for a bit.

It continued where it left off. Where it always ends. My mind is spinning and I feel nauseous and confused. This is a scene I've never encountered.

His breath was hot at my ear, the words came clustered and hard to understand. I couldn't make out the need in his voice as his touch came down, firm and demanding. I tried to pull back, but found the warmth of his face on mine, instead. His forehead was pressing gently on mine, his hands on my face and his lips searching down the middle of my face for mine. I tried to pull away.

His face was close to mine, his words but a whisper of need. I couldn't make out his face. I could feel his warmth clutching me, needing me, pulling me in. Arms were around my waist. This person needs me, but I don't know why. I want to help this person. I want to be there for this person. I feel lips on my neck, a wetness following my juggular, and I shiver. I find my hands, searching in the dark. I can feel skin beneath my fingertips. It's smooth and cool despite the heat I feel all around me. I caress this new smoothness. I feel arching under my hands, and I hear it once, and I want to continue...

"Please."

The one word I can hear. This voice so familiar but I can't place it yet. Then that color. Silver. The first color I've seen in this monochromatic landscape of a dream. I see the glint in the eyes of this person. The pure want in this gaze, gives my beating heart a jolt of electricity. There is silver against the is brightness to this darkness, There is silver causing the heat. It's pulling me in. Pulling me closer, there are lips on mine. I can see him. Him. It's him.

Lavi awakes, once more in the same sweat as the previous nights. His hands come to rest on either side of his head. Green eye wide and searching amongst the patterns of his sheets. His breathing pace quickens, as the anxiety takes over. His dream has given him a clue. A large hint that he needed. He knows who he has been dreaming of. He knows who is causing this subconcious anxiety. He throws the blankets off his body, and tries to stand. His feet betraying him in slumber as he collapses.

"It can't be... I...I don't ever think I could...Oh Christ.."

Lavi puts his head in his hands and shakes.

"I've feelings for a man."