This is my first official School for Good and Evil fan fiction. This one was based off the chapter, The Roach and the Fox, and wanted to play with the unusualness that chapter itself could have lead to. This is not meant to offend or upset people. Its purely for comedic purposes and I advise anyone to sit back and have a good laugh. Please enjoy.
..: Two Foxes and a Roach :..
Wolves don't like foxes. Blue Brook at midnight. T.
That's what the note said. Sophie waltz around the empty room, dancing with the note as if it were Tedros himself. Finally, she will have her prince, like she always dreamed of.
The clock was ticking closer to midnight, yet Sophie was fitting into her black dress and admiring herself in the mirror. Agatha arrived to witness her friend lovestruck at her own reflection and lambasted her friend for procrastinating.
Agatha pressured her to go nude as clothes will be of no use during Mogrification. With a simple and rushed lesson, Sophie was able to form herself to a beautiful pink fox with sparkling fur.
With roach Agatha hiding in Sophie's furry nape, the two journeyed to the Blue Brook, terrifying wolves on the way there. One wolf threw an ax at Sophie the Fox before jotting away and screaming like a little girl.
"You said they wouldn't bother me," Sophie panted, barely dodging her own decapitation.
"And I told you to avoid them just in case." Agatha retorted.
As they rushed out of the tunnel and arrived to the open clearing, Sophie glimpse at the moon above. This was a beautiful night for a kiss. She spotted the safe entrance to the forest and dashed for her true love.
Roach Agatha held on to Sophie's mane tightly, like a jockey grasping the reins of her horse. All Agatha needed was a whip. So she improvised. She kicked her prickly legs at Sophie's back.
"Ow!"
"Faster!" Agatha chirped.
"Stop that!" cried Sophie, but she continued to get lashes from the disgusting cockroach.
Admittedly, Agatha was having a lot of fun until she notice a warm wet feeling on her roachy leg.
"Oops."
"Oops? What Oops? Sophie asked, "What happened?"
"N—nothing." Agatha couldn't bring herself to tell her all that prodding had made Sophie bleed.
Sophie finally arrived. The blue forest gleamed under the vast moon, dots of lights sprinkled deep within the tree lines. The smell of dew was like natures perfume once you stop to notice. And the cool gentle air brushed through Sophie's gorgeous pink fur.
Her heart pounding like pistons. Her back in such pain, it felt like it may have been bleeding. Every time Sophie brought it up, Agatha would reply like a broken record.
"Everything is fine; everything is fine!"
Sophie took cautionary steps to the bridge, peering near and afar for any sign of Tedros.
"I don't see him," Sophie said.
"His note said he'd be here!" Agatha whispered, she too scanning the scene.
"Suppose Hester and Anadil played a trick." Sophie whisper to the roach. If that were the case, then what could she do? She had suspected the two roommates of her's may be secret lovers and you couldn't put it pass Sophie to tell the whole School of Evil. In fact, Evers should have the right to know as well.
"Who are you talking to?" came a voice.
The two girls jumped an inch. Sophie's fur flared and could have sworn she heard the roach on her back give out a whistling fart.
In the woods, deep blue eyes peered back at Sophie. Tedros gently stepped out into the moon light and he too a fox, only with fur of navy blue.
"Say something!" Agatha whispered with a quick punt, accidentally jabbing Sophie's fresh scar. Sophie completely petrified in place, snapped out of her tomb.
Tedros patiently walked across and on to the bridge where she stood.
"Um—uh . . . " Sophie began, but no words came out.
"I talk to myself when I'm nervous," Agatha whispered into Sophie's ears.
"I—I talk to myself when I'm nervous," Sophie replied, her eyes locked to his and his to hers. A tad shaky.
"I thought only princesses get nervous." He said. "Not the best villain in school."
"Only the best Good can disguise as Evil," Agatha went on. "Especially when it has love to fight for."
"O—only the best Good can disguise as Evil," Sophie tried mimicking. "Especially when it is love they fight for."
"So it really was a mistake all along?" Tedros smiled in relief. He came in much closer.
"I had to play both sides in order to survive," Agatha continued.
"I played . . . both sides just to survive." Sophie repeated, her voice timid.
Agatha's jimmies were tingling. This was just like all those exotic stories she wrote, but Sophie was close to ruining it. She could feel Sophie's nerves rattle, worried she would possibly fumble her lines. She wasn't surprise that she didn't repeat exactly what she said but Sophie was doing okay so far.
"Now, according to the Prince Code, I have a promise to fulfill." Tedros stated, he moved closer to Sophie, looking deep into her green eyes. "What would you like me to ask you?"
The girls froze. What do you ask a prince to ask you?
"Do you see who I am now?" Agatha spat, now wanting to punch herself.
"Do you see who I am now?" Sophie repeated.
"You do know this will throw both schools into upheaval?" Tedros said calmly in barely a whisper. He gave Sophie a heartfelt smirk. Her heart pounding so furiously that it hurt.
"I do."
"I . . . I do."
"You do know you will spend the rest of your life trying to prove you're Good?"
"I do."
". . . Yes."
Dammit Sophie!
Tedros eyed the pink fox and smiled. He came in closer and pressed his chest to hers. A bone of some part of Tedros' fox anatomy prodded her throat painfully.
"And you know I'm going to kiss you now?"
The two girls gasped. Agatha in surprise. Sophie after Tedros neck bone jabbed her.
Tedros lowered his face to Sophie's; nose barely touching. She could feel the warmth in his breath. The smell of fresh grass.
Tedros eats grass?
Agatha madly flicked her antennae in excitement. They were finally going to go home. Part of her wanted to watch for some reason, but she respected Sophie enough to give her friend some privacy. So she kept watching.
Sophie was going to get her prince. One kiss was all she needed. However, this sacred moment wouldn't be without consequences. The plan after all was for Sophie to kiss her prince so she can prove she can love. To prove she was not a Never, but an Ever. To prove the School Master was ill informed. But a kiss that will take she and Agatha home . . . without her prince.
"But we should wait," Sophie said. Her voice strain.
Agatha's antennae stopped. Her large bug eyes widen in disbelief.
Sophie calmly backed away from a disappointed Tedros. His eyes sad, her's guilty. Agatha's cross-eyed in fury.
"Sure. Course, Obviously," Tedros murmured. He seemed unsure what else to do at this point. Agatha noticed his glossy eyes swell with tears after Sophie's rejection. It made Agatha almost feel sorry for him.
Almost.
"I'll, um, walk you to your tunnel."
"No!"
Tedros and Agatha jumped in surprise.
"I know . . . I know this may sound odd." Sophie paused, thinking for the right words to say. "But there is another . . . way to show our love."
Uh oh.
Agatha trembled in her exoskeleton.
Sophie came in closer to Tedros, whom seemed unsure what was going on. She brushed herself under his blue furry chin and gently whipped his face with her bushy tail.
Tedros' heart began to rapid further as Sophie returned for another stroke. He took one look down at Sophie's gentle body as she passed.
Worried, Agatha glimpsed up at Tedros the Fox. He was staring down at her. Both their eyes bulged in shock.
"Sophie!" He yelped loudly.
Startled, the pink fox whipped around.
Agatha took her chances. She crawled further from Sophie's back and down to latch on her furry chest to avoid Tedros' field of vision.
"What!?" Sophie said, worried Tedros may have spotted Agatha.
"Y—you're bleeding!"
"What!?" Sophie wailed, turning her head to spot the mark of blood but she couldn't see her entire back.
"It doesn't look too bad," Tedros said. Getting a closer look.
"Oh . . . I—I must've gotten it from the branch back in the forest." Sophie lied. She tried to get a good glimpse of Tedros who was still examining the wound. "It's not bad is it—"
Sophie stopped.
Something warm and moist had grazed across her scab. Her prince aided her by licking the blood off her beautiful pink fur. Sophie wasn't sure what to make of this. He was helping her; but was it something more? It felt sort of nice. Sophie looked ahead and allowed the gentle bathing. Each new stroke more moist and warmer than the last.
Agatha on the other hand was in panic-mode. For a second, she thought her cover was blown. Now she knew making Sophie bleed was probably going to be a useful deus ex machina for the Storian one day.
Giggles above Agatha brought her back.
They better be ready to kiss, dammit.
Agatha sighed in frustration. She couldn't believe it. She should have known Sophie would try to prolong her shenanigans. Now here she was, moping upside-down in place as Sophie's body shimmy side to side, waiting for these stupid dogs to kiss—
What the hell is going on?
Something caught Agatha's attention. She ascended her head from Sophie's furry chest. She wished she hadn't because now she couldn't look away. Her eyes swelled as something uncanny swayed from in-between Tedros legs. It was red, long and glisten in the moon light.
WHY!?
Agatha wanted to kill herself. She wrote erotic stories all the time back at her graveyard but never about stuff like this. That's not how she rolled. The damn circumstances she found herself in is astounding to say the least.
Without warning, Agatha suddenly felt her whole body turn as if the world had topple over. Sophie flipped on her back, her chest up and Agatha now on top looking out at Tedros' foxy face and his . . . junk . . . raising over like a blimp in the open sky.
OH SHI—
Tedros and Sophie where doing more than the pokey and Agatha stood hidden in Sophie's fur, shocked and disgusted at what she was witnessing.
Doesn't this count as true love!? Agatha thought to herself. Why aren't we home yet?
Well you see, kids, when mom and dad are in love, they prefer to express that love in ways that may seem alien to you. Often times you may hear about couples hugging or kissing, but in private when mom and dad are alone, they do something called sex. That's when hugging and kissing escalates to something special. Now does that mean sex equates to love? Not quite. Two people don't necessarily need to be in love or even married to perform sex. This is often times referred to as a fling or a one-night-stand. One example of said flings can come from a multitude of stories Agatha herself has written. These flings are what Agatha likes to call, hate-sex, starring herself and Tedros—
"No! BE QUIET!" Agatha blurted.
"Huh! Who said that?" Tedros sputtered, gasping for air after numerous pelvic thrusting. His eyes bugging out of another daydream of him having hate-sex with Agatha.
Agatha quickly fleaing through Sophie's fur and whispered into her ear.
"Uh, that was me . . . " Sophie repeated. Her cheeks flushed at the sight of her prince.
"Oh . . . okay, Agatha." Tedros said.
Sophie and Agatha both did a double take, staring back at Tedros. Agatha's eyes watered like a sad puppy who aways wanted to be loved.
"W—What did you call me?" Sophie spat, ignoring Agatha's sniffles.
"I—I said I'm . . . I'm coming." Tedros quickly shrift his thoughts. He couldn't believe he was thinking of having sex with Agatha, but he didn't need to, especially when he was actually deflowering a beautiful princess instead. He looked down at his true love—Tedros soul darkened.
I'M HAVING SEX WITH A FOX! Tedros said to himself. No wonder I'm thinking about that wretched witch.
His man-hood gave a violet twitch. Reality hit Tedros common senses and knew he needed to evacuate. He pulled straight out of Sophie and with a gruff and a wail, a flow of white liquid streamed and steamed from his wand and all over Sophie.
Agatha, who popped her head up to see what the commotion was about, took an unexpected amount of warm ooze herself. Agatha was flung off of Sophie and on to the bridge, sticky and wet.
Gross.
Agatha was stuck on her back. Covered in a blanket of fox milk, she couldn't break herself free either. She looked up at the spurring rainbow mesh foxes. Tedros had turned around and lowered himself. Sophie taking in his prince's red meat in her mouth while Tedros aimed his tongue in-between Sophie's legs.
Agatha needed to stop this. They can turn back to humans again at any moment. If that happens, than the author will run out of safe words for penis.
She tried with all her roachy powers to escape the pasty residue but it wouldn't budge. This stuff was thick. Clearly Tedros didn't drink enough water. She had no other choice. Agatha decided it was all she had left . . . she has to eat it.
Quickly and repulsively, Agatha ate up everything Tedros left on her. She gagged a few times before coming to a strange realization.
"This isn't bad at all, actually." Agatha muttered to herself. However, she wasn't sure if it was her cockroach instinct that was telling her this or maybe this stuff really was—dare she say—tasty.
Quite possibly her cockroach instinct, but that didn't matter. Agatha admire the taste. It was unique. But it did something to her. It was like a light switch in Agatha's heart that finally manage to be tapped.
Agatha no longer cared about Sophie kissing her prince and having her happy ending; she was being a Wisenheimer anyhow. It was Sophie's fault for attempting to prolong this charade. Her fault for not taking her prince—granted, she would have lost him soon after, but that was beside the point. Sophie strayed from their agreement:
Kiss him and go home.
Sophie had her chance and she broke it. Now this was Agatha's time. She decided to take charge of this whole dysfunctional mess and claim ownership. Tedros will be her's now. Sophie will just have to deal with it.
She guzzled the final strand of semen left, flexed her puny muscles and pounced back to stab Sophie's foxy nose.
"Mmphh!" Sophie's muffle a scream. Agatha continued to prod her nose until Sophie's mouth finally released her prince. "What are you—?"
"You're done here; this is mine now." Agatha whispered furiously and glazed her now prince with her roachy tongue. Sophie gaped at Agatha in disbelief.
"But—No, stop that!" Sophie desperately pushed Agatha away with her nose but Agatha hopped back on. "Leave him alone, he's my prince!"
"He called my name, not yours!" Agatha angrily hissed. She hugged onto Tedros jewels and caressed them with her face. Sophie grew angry and snarled at her back stabbing friend.
Unaware his princess and a roach gone rogue were fighting over their share of his penis, Tedros took the liberty to gently press his entire fox snout into Sophie's vagina. Deep in the depths of her love canal, Tedros lathered his tongue around, taking in all the secretion he could. Like an anteater feasting, only instead of fire ants, Tedros used his tongue to scoop eggs out of her uterus.
Sophie moaned out loud. Her voice ringing out to the beautiful night, letting all to know she could love just like any other princess. Proving, in fact, that she was a true Ever because Nevers cannot love at all.
Agatha, of course, knew that was bullshit.
At the School for Good, Chaddick jumped to the window, his drenched packs exposed to the open cool air with only his blanket draping his shoulders. He was panting like he ran a mile. He clapped his hands over his ears, his face in shear annoyance. He looked out to the blue forest. Loud passionate whines and moans of a fox echoed all across the night sky; a sound that gave him such a deep headache.
"SHUT UP!" He shouted. His roar was like a nuke in a fantasy setting.
"Shht snapped a husky voice behind him. "You trying to wake the whole school?"
"I'm sure the whole school were already awake from all that yapping out there, Hes." Chaddick said in frustration.
"So what's making that noise?"
"I think they're foxes." Chaddick replied. His hands resting on the glass sill. "Who would have thought they could be so obnoxious."
"Foxes?" said a topless Hester. Her figure edged beside him. She too appeared to have been running laps. "Ugh, who cares. Don't let them bother us, Chad."
Chaddick shook his head, eyeing the forest as more foxy yips bellowed. He reached over and grabbed a bow and an arrow, pulled, and fired. The arrow whist through the air and into the blue forest.
"Really?" Hester said, clicking her tongue.
Chaddick flung the bow after it.
"Okay, stop!" Hester chuckled, taking hold of his arms. She smiled ear to ear at Chaddick's ridiculousness.
Hester wrapped her arms around Chaddick's neck, drawing his attention back to her. Her breast press against his bare well crafted chest.
"Let's just get back to our time, 'kay?" She whispered seductively. Her narrow lips pale from lack of black lipstick.
She gently pulled him in for a longing kiss. As the two waltz away, lips locked, Hester manage to grab the silk curtains and shut it over their window. Soon after, the two forbidden hypocrites were doing more than kissing.
Everything stopped in the blue forest. The passionate night turned to unsteady panting. Sophie resisted the urge to move as she laid on her back.
"Please, get it out Teddy." Sophie hiccuped in pain. Tears streaming over her furry cheeks.
"Stay still." Tedros replied softly.
A mysterious arrow stood erected from Sophie's stomach. Tedros trying to get a grip with his fangs to pull out the mini spear but getting a good hold was tougher as a fox.
Agatha peered from Sophie's mane. She watched as Tedros continued and failed again to free Sophie from the arrow that gave her friend so much pain.
Almost as quick as the arrow, like a lightening clasp, a flinging bow swung down hitting the butt of the arrow, hammering it in even further.
Sophie screamed as the arrow had now fully impaled her completely through her body. Tedros worried he will get in trouble for this, fled the scene. He did not want anything to do with this anymore. Sophie pleaded for her prince to return but he vanished into the woods. Desperate for assistance, she called out to her only friend.
"Agatha, help!" Sophie cried. "Please, Agatha! I'm sorry." She twist and turned for her friend, but she wasn't there. "Agatha?"
Agatha the roach stuck her head out of the furry nape. They were speeding away into the School for Good. She looked down at the navy blue fox she was riding. She gave Tedros a good gentle nozzle; adorable little hearts bubbling over her head. Tedros was her prince now.
She kick his back with her roachy legs.
"AW!"
"Faster!"
"What the hell!?"
The following morning was not what you would expect. Once Tedros and Agatha returned to their normal human selves, it left them in a very awkward predicament—but we won't get into that.
Sophie wandered the school with a patch around her mid-section, unable to sit well or even eat properly. Not to mention a little dazed after falling straight from Agatha's bedroom window the same night. Although angry after said turn of events, she still had time to spread the rumor that Hester and Anadil were secret lovers.
Upset at first, Hester figured the stupid lie was better than everyone knowing she was actually sleeping around with Chaddick. There's a no-no policy regarding Evers and Nevers being in an intimate relationship together. Why do you think the whole school wanted to kill Sophie?
At the meantime, Hester decided to go by the name "Ester" until this whole thing blew over.
Anadil on the other hand was furious. She cursed out everyone who brought it up and swears to kill who ever started such a rumor. Though she suspected Dot had something to do with it.
Sophie sipped her tea in silence, watching Anadil creating a scene before walking away to give her rats a bath.
Meanwhile, Tedros and Agatha entered the Clearing with their lunch; holding hands, fingers locked. Sophie spat her tea out. The whole school stared at the newly form couple in utter shock.
"How did Tedros and Agatha get together?" wailed Beatrix.
Again, we won't get into that. All they knew was Agatha and Tedros were in love. And Agatha made sure Tedros drank plenty of water this time.
In the School Master's tower, the Storian etched another ending of its latest novel. The School Master took it and read the title:
Two Foxes and a Roach.
He tossed it aside along with the others. This was all the Storian was pumping out lately. Last night it was The Tale of Hester and Chaddick: Book #34 and now this. The largest pile of books have been written in just under this first year alone; all of which are eroticas. The School Master watched as the Storian immediately began anew.
The Sexy Tale of Anadil and her Three Rats.
He let out a depressing sigh. A tear slither from his eyes behind his mask. The School Master stood in scribbling silence . . . forever a virgin.
Well that's all for now. If you're interested in more of these kind of stories, let me know in the review section. If I'm feeling on the creative humor side, I just may start a new chapter or two. Until then, I hope you had a wail of a time. Thanks.
The School for Good and Evil and its characters are the property of Soman Chainani. This fan-fiction is written under fair-use.