Love me, love you
The first time it happened, she had been with the pack, sitting in Emily's back yard. She was resting against Jared's legs while scarfing down hotdogs. Sam had leaned over, pressed his lips to Emily's, and Leah's smile faded.
She pulled away from Jared, headed towards the woods. Jacob growled low in the back of his throat when Paul made to follow. "Let her go."
The first time it happened, she thought she was crazy. Thoughts of self loathing, of hate, of pure...unadulterated rage swarmed inside her head, made her limbs tremble with the tell-tale signs of phasing. Bile rose to her throat and she heaved into the bushes.
You'd think she'd be over it after seeing her in his mind all the time, but no. Seeing them...it still hurt.
You're better. The voice whispered in the back of her mind, rough and husky, like the voice of a man that enjoyed one to many glasses of scotch, one to many fine cigars. It was gentle, and it was loving, but mostly it was resonating - whispering into her ears, bouncing around her mind. She inhaled sharply and looked around, half expecting to see one of the pack, or perhaps even a Cullen playing a joke.
There was no one.
Muscles tensing in panic, Leah curled her lips back and crouched into a low fighting stance. She was ready for whatever it was to come. She was ready.
Nothing came.
Relax. Love. The words were broken, as if the man hadn't spoken for many nights. Like how Seth had sounded when he had had his tonsils taken out. Like it was painful to talk.
"Who are you?" She called to the surruonding trees. They remained silent, and she remained tensed upon the forest floor.
Family. Brother.
"Seth?"
No, wolf. Pack.
He sounded unsure now, uncertain. As if he was trying to find the right words to explain it to her.
"You're not from our pack?"
No. Yes...from pack. Family. Brother. You are sister.
Leah still didn't understand. She uncurled from her crouch, cast a nervous glance around. "I don't know who you are, or what you're playing at, but go the fuck away."
Never. Here always, Leah. Love you.
An image flashed infront of her eyes - her, brushing her teeth in the morning. Her eyes were focused on the glass, a rich gold. No longer her deep, muddy brown. No longer tainted. Pure. She spat in the sink, watching herself and, oh. That was from this morning.
Perfect.
Confused and maybe just a bit scared, Leah tucked tail and returned to Sam's. Jacob's hand curled around the back of her neck, gave her a comforting squeeze, and he pressed his forehead to hers. "Leah?"
"I'm fine Jake."
What surprised her the most was that she was.
ZZZ
It happened again, weeks later. They were playing a pack game Seth had dubbed 'Catch the Wolf'. It was like tag, but harder. Because only one wolf wasn't "it". At the moment, Leah was the prey. As the fastest wolf, it made sense for them to catch her.
Each wolf sang a different song, tried to cloud their minds so they couldn't see or hear where Leah was. Relying only on their senses, rather than the pack bond.
It happened again when that damn voice snarled in her ear down. It had the weight behind it of an alpha order and, startled, Leah slammed herself to the ground. Paul flew over her head, crashed into a tree, and he whispered go.
For the rest of the hunt the man spoke to her, ordered her. She was too distracted today, too many things to think about. She relied little on her senses, and much on the voice. She ran for a total of eight hours, and not a single brother caught her.
'How did you do that?' She was the only wolf phased, but couldn't very well ask the question outloud.
Instinct sister. Nose, ears, eyes. Always watching. Safe, here.
Leah realized that no. She wasn't going crazy; at least...not in the normal sense. She wasn't hearing things. No auditory hallucinations. She was talking to the wolf that lived inside of her. So why, just why did he sound like a man?
Brother, sister. Balance. The voice - no, the wolf - was quiet for a long time, as Leah padded back home. She asked no more questions, just waited for a response. The sky and the earth. Harmony. Too much - no good. Understand?
Yes. She understood.
Finally.
ZZZ
Now that she was aware of him being there, she noticed the little things. The small flashes of memories, sort of like photographs. It mostly happened when she was feeling down, or stupid. He'd flash a grade from school or a pretty outfit at her, fill her heart with love for herself.
She spent less time worrying, and more time teaching him english. His voice worked fine, but he was unusued to talking, leaning heavily on his senses. With her help he began to talk in actual senses, began to communicate with her properly.
In return when they ran, he closed their eyes and showed Leah how wonderful her nose and ears could be. She only ran into one tree on the trip, and he had done that on purpose, laughter rumbling in her mind.
She swore she could feel his breath on her neck.
He heard her talking and told her, simply, I love you.
ZZZ
She contemplated telling Jacob about her wolf after he had accused her of becoming a recluse. She loved her pack, of course, and liked being around them...it was just that -
I understand you better.
"Yeah. You do."
They had spent the last three months talking, learning, teaching, running. It was fun, and okay, maybe she wasn't spending that much time with her pack, maybe she talked less now, but she was happy. Couldn't they feel that?
They worry.
"There isn't anything to worry about."
Go play. He sounded amused, and she rolled her eyes, watching herself in the mirror. It was the only way he could see her, unless he watched through her brothers eyes. She did take his advice though, and she went to play with her pack.
Once more they were at Emily's.
Leah had honestly gotten better over the last few weeks, but the deep, musky smell of sex made her blood boil. She met Sam's eyes, saw the concern on his face, and she snarled. It was more wolf that human, and she could feel him, bristling inside of her head.
Unacceptable.
Leah stepped forward, ready to attack Sam because no, not even she could hurt an imprint, even if that imprint was Emily.
It felt like a fist curled over her brain, squeezed it, held it together so she didn't lose her head. He had control, and he had taken it by force. She felt her legs moving, leading her backwards. It was strange, almost...detached. She could feel it, but she couldn't control it.
Her wolf lead her into the woods, where he ripped the fur away from her insides, put it on the outside. He ran them into the ground until they were exhausted, and then he took them home.
'Will I always be alone?'
You're not alone. I'm here.
'You can't do everything.' She reminded him softly, voice weary in their head.
No. But I can make you feel good, Leah.
He took her to the bathroom, where he washed her body. It was her hands stroking over her flesh, but it was so...different. She could see, and feel, but it felt as though someone else was touching her. It was sensual.
Her cheeks flushed in slight embarressment, as she couldn't imagine ever having someone bathe her. He did it though, soaped her up, stroked her body to a heightened state of arousal. By the time he was done she was trembling, weak in the knees.
He laid her on the bottome of the tub, lazily hung one leg over the side of it. No one was home and he took advantage of it, using Leah's hands to stroke her body to a sobbing peak. She had masturbated before, but it had never felt like that.
ZZZ
"I don't know what to do. At first, I thought it was like...the imprint bond or something. I thought I was just hearing Kim. But I mentioned it to her last night and she looked at me like I was a fuckin' loon." Jared had his face in his hands, and he stunk of despair and fear.
"Well...what happened exactly?" Jacob shifted uncomfortably, brow furrowing at one of his oldest wolves.
"I was just thinking about how much I missed Kim, and how I hoped she was okay." Jared swallowed thickly. They had been chasing after a vampire that broke boarders, and Kim had been left alone with Emily. "Then I could hear...someone...telling me to focus, and calm down. That if I didn't focus I wouldn't catch it, and then there would be an actual danger."
"You said it sounded like a girl?" Leah turned her thoughts inward, looked to her wolf for answers.
I told you before. Balance. Too much - no good. Harmony. Remember?
'So you're saying that...the wolf isn't the same as the human?'
Exactly.
"Jared. I need to show you something."
The pack turned to their she wolf, but her eyes never left Jared.
"Leah?"
She stood, strode forward, held out a hand. "Trust me. You'll feel better."
Jared did trust her, and so he followed.
ZZZ
They were the only two wolves phased, but they were surrounded by pack. Jared was still a little lost, but he trusted Leah to make things a bit clearer. At her own discretion of course.
There was no rushing Leah Clearwater. Ever.
'You have to listen closely Jared. Listen.'
'What am I listening for Leah?'
'For her.'
'Who is she?'
'Just shut up, and listen.'
Those who don't only hear but do not listen never learn. Stop using your ears, start using your brain. Her wolf was talking, loud enough that he travelled through the pack mind, caused Jared to jerk and look around. No one else was phased, they were all in clear sight.
No fear. Relax. The crooning voice was that of a woman, loving and gentle. Like a mother talking to a child, soothing it to sleep.
'Understand?' Leah asked. She allowed her thoughts to run rampant through the bond, to explain and in the end, Jared bowed his head in a nod.
Yes, he understood. Now to make the rest of the pack understand.
ZZZ
Leah stopped phasing along with Sam, a mere five years after uniting with her wolf. The pack had grown in numbers, and it had grown in heart. The unity between wolf and human allowed for an easier transition to simply human.
Leah's wolf still talked to her.
ZZZ
She aged alone, but surrounded by family. She never had a family of her own, even after her body started menstrating again. Leah never had a family of her own because she never loved anyone as much as she loved her other half.
The wolf stayed with her for life, until she was old and grey, and dying in her bed. He passed with her to the other side.
Together they ran, soul mates finally freed from the bodies that had kept them prisoner. They ran together as wolves, weaved through the trees, and watched over their people. Even in death they were protectors.
Even in death they were in love.