Perspective
A Harry Potter Fanfiction
By Jewel

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and its characters were created by JK Rowling and are copyrighted to their rightful owners. There is no copyright infringement intended by this fanfiction.

Rated PG for themes.

Spoilers for GoF and OotP.

Written for Nymphadora Tonks week at the "HPchar100" community on LiveJournal.

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Perspective (1/1)
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Nymphadora Tonks hated St. Mungo's. She was only at the wizarding hospital because authorities with greater power than herself had deemed it necessary for her to remain there until all of her injuries healed. Although she received magical treatments every day, her wounds were healing as though she were a muggle. The Battle at the Department of Mysteries had happened three weeks ago and the injuries she had sustained were still only barely healed.

For the first week the mediwitches had given her potions that left her in a drugged state, ensuring that she was awake for only short intervals at a time. But since being allowed to remain conscious, Tonks was bombarded daily by visitors. Members of the Order and fellow aurors from the Ministry dropped by every day to leave flowers or to check in on her progress. Her mother rarely left her side, and when Andromeda was gone, Ted took up the empty chair in his daughter's room.

After the third week, however, Tonks was bored out of her mind. Visitors came by just a frequently, though Andromeda had finally been convinced to return home at nights for some rest. And although Tonks liked the attention and the flowers, she quickly became restless. True, her injuries were still another week from being healed enough to allow her to be discharged, and probably another month away from allowing her to return to work, but thanks to some potions Tonks felt only the bare minimum of pain. There were books to read, and some light paperwork for the Ministry as well as the Order, but for Tonks it wasn't the same as tracking down dark wizards.

That was how, three weeks into her stay at St. Mungo's, Tonks found herself sneaking out of her room. With her mother at home and the mediwitches no longer keeping her under constant surveillance, Tonks was finally free to prowl the wings of the hospital. During his last visit, Bill Weasley had mentioned being accosted by Gilderoy Lockhart. The latter had proceeded to babble to Bill about his fan mail. Tonks had always rather thought Lockhart was handsome, and she was a bit ashamed to admit that she owned most of his books. For lack of anything else do, Tonks decided on whim, as she tended to do things, to find the object of her teenage crush.

It didn't take long for Tonks to find Ward 49, where St. Mungo's housed its patients with permanent mental damage caused by spells. She hadn't really known what to expect; from Bill's description she thought it might be a bit more festive than it was. Despite the late hour there were quite a few patients awake. Tonks surveyed the patients, but did not find Lockhart.

She was ready to return to her own room, or possibly the kitchens to steal a bit of food, when her eyes caught on a couple. They were both standing near the back of the ward, staring blankly at something on the wall. Though she could only see their side profiles, Tonks recognized them almost immediately. They were Alice and Frank Longbottom, famous aurors from the last war, and original members of the old Order of the Phoenix.

As a auror and a member of the new Order, Tonks of course knew what had happened to the couple. After Voldemort's disappearance fifteen years ago, the Longbottoms had been captured by a group of Death Eaters and tortured for information. Bellatrix Lestrange, Tonks's aunt, had used the Cruciatus Curse as her chief method of torture, and had eventually driven the Longbottoms insane.

Tonks felt a chill along her spine. During the battle last month she had been fighting against Bellatrix until Remus Lupin had taken over. She knew there were fates worse than deaths, but seeing the Longbottoms Tonks began to wonder... If she had continued fighting against Bellatrix, would she still be alive? Would she be dead, or worse, driven out of her mind?

She had been an auror for a year now, she knew the inherent risks of being one. Death was one such risk, torture another. While she had encountered her share of dark wizards, had suffered her share of injuries, though none had been as extensive as her recent ones.

Still, though, she had gotten off easily. When she became an auror Tonks had gained access to many of the Ministry's classified files and had used her authority to read up on her aunt. Before her capture and sentence to Azkaban, many people, muggles and wizards alike, had faced Bellatrix and died. Before her capture Bellatrix had rendered the Longbottoms unable to recognize the world around them, leaving them useless to the Order and damaged for their family. Only three weeks ago Bellatrix had fought at the Department of Mysteries and killed Sirius Black, her own cousin.

And here Tonks was... Still alive and ticking for having faced off against one of the most vicious Death Eaters. Looking at the Longbottoms, Tonks almost felt like she had cheated. Turning away from Ward 49, Tonks began to limp back to her room. Her wounds here hurting now, though she didn't know how much of that was due to the effects of a potion wearing off, and how much was psychosomatic.

Even after returning to her room and tucking herself into bed, Tonks still couldn't shake the Longbottoms, Sirius and Bellatrix from her mind. Here she was, worse for wear but still alive, and all she could think of was getting out of St. Mungo's. The Longbottoms were permanently stuck here. And Sirius... well no one knew for sure where Sirius was, but he was dead and not coming to bring flowers anytime soon.

It took some effort, but eventually Tonks feel asleep. If she dreamt, she didn't remember any of it upon awaking.

She had just finished her breakfast when her mother and father arrived, right on time with some new magazines for her to read.

"How are you, dear?" Andromeda asked, placing the stack of magazines on the table beside Tonks's bed.

Tonks smiled weakly at her mother. "Same old, same old."

"We spoke to the healers just now," Ted said, picking up the remainder of Tonks's abandoned muffin. "They said you should be able to come home with us at the end of the week."

Tonks stopped flipping through a magazine and looked up at her parents. "Really?"

Andromeda looked sharply at her daughter. "I know how restless you've been, Nymphadora, but you'll still be confined to your bed at home."

Tonks smiled at her mother. "I've had a change of perspective last night, mum. I've decided I rather like being confined to bed. Being waited on hand and foot tends to spoil a girl."

"And what brought on this change of perspective?" Andromeda asked, arching an eyebrow.

Tonks's smile faded. Somberly she said, "The realization that I could be dead, or worse."

Ted frowned. "I'm not sure if that's a positive or negative view to have."

Staring off into the distance, Tonks replied, "I prefer to think of it as an inspirational view."

Silently Tonks thought, I'll need all the rest I can get for what's ahead... And for what I need to do.

END

Jewel
(06.20.2005)