Title: Basterds No More

Rated: M/R for sexual content, violence, and death

Words: 864

Summary: Landa is in control

A/N: I've always wanted to see the movie. After the ONTD stuff and looking at the Kink Meme, I wanted to see it even more. I wanted to see who people were pairing up. Having finally seen the movie, I decided that Landa was just too awesome to pair with anyone and this is what happened.

"So you are the Basterds." Colonel Hans Landa said with a malicious chuckle. His eyes were lowered to the ground as he paced leisurely in front of them. His boots clicked against the cobblestone the abandoned court yard; each step, drumming in their ears. All eight were down on their knees, scowling at him with their hands bound behind their backs. Behind the captives stood a row of German soldiers, each eager to claim the glory of killing one of the Basterds. Landa towered over the men in his SS uniform, hands folded behind his back, the trusses of his leather coat brushing his legs.

"That be us. What can we do for you?" Aldo said in his deep southern accent. Landa was about to reply that his question was a rhetorical when he stopped pacing. He stood in front of him and turned to face him. A amused grin spread across his handsome face.

"What can you do," he opened his hands and placed both on the sides of his chest as he spoke, "for me?" He asked. "I'm glad you asked actually." He cocked his head to the side and resumed his pace. Looking up thoughtfully as he walked, he continued. "There is this group of men you see who have been a thorn in my side. They have killed many of my men. It's quite frustrating you know? It's no good for morale; on top of that, it makes the Furer very angry. I like my job… No, I love my job. The last thing I want to do is make him angry." He stopped in front of Aldo again. "So, you are going to help me get rid of my," he paused, "pent up frustration. All of you actually."

He turned to face him once more. His hands ever so slowly went to his belt. Keeping eye contact, Landa unfastened the buckle, the button and slowly unzipped his fly. With one hand, he reached in and freed his flaccid cock. The other men stirred uncomfortably and Aldo leaned back, only to be jabbed by a barrel of a gun.

"Now hold on here Colonel. I don't know what kind of men do you think we are—"

"You're in no position to negotiate." With one nod of his head and eye contact with a soldier, a shot went off. One of the captives fell head first, blood pooling around his head. "Now that that is clear, or well, it should be, here is what you are all going to do. Each and every one of you will suck my cock. If I dare feel anything as a brush of a tooth, another will die. Now Aldo, since you are the leader, you get to go first."

Aldo grimaced and turned his head to look at his men. Before he could read their faces, he was jabbed by a barrel hard in the back. He looked up at Landa and wanted to pummel the grin off his smug face. Leaning into his groin he took all of his soft cock into his mouth. Landa twitched slightly and roughly pulled his hair. "Gentle now. We wouldn't want to see any more of your men get hurt. Lick it; I like lots tongue."

Once Aldo's hair was released, he withdrew the cock from his mouth and slowly began licking up and down the shaft. Landa smirked as he watched him, those defiant eyes looking up as if they were trying to burn a hole in him. "Very good." He praised and moved to the once nick named the Bear Jew. "I believe your next."

Scowling as fierce as the first, he leaned in and licked the now semi hard cock. "Good, good now suck it, suck it hard. I want it hard and fast. Suck it like a cheap whore!"

More hair was grabbed and pulled. He went through them, one by one thrusting into their mouths, making them choke and gag as he fucked their faces. Every time one would glare, he would slap them across the face. Finally, this would be the end of those filthy basterds and the thought alone brought him closer and closer to the edge. Holding his wet hard cock, Landa stood front and center of the men.

"Look at me." He ordered and the soldiers behind the captives all butted them with their guns so that they would follow. With his eyes focused on Aldo, he stroked until he came. Come glazed and dripped down Aldo's face. Once his breathing returned to normal, he tucked himself back into his pants and fixed his clothing. "Well, that certainly helped." He took a deep breath. "Oh Aldo, you have something on your face."

Landa extended his hand and smeared his cum all over his face and his hand. With that same hand he slapped each and every one of the basterds. "Well men, I have more work to do. Auf Wiedersehen." Hands behind his back once more, he walked away towards the direction of the vehicles. He raised one hand in the air, giving a signal. Simultaneously he heard shots fire. TheInglourious Basterds would not be a problem to Germany no more.

End