The second of my TWO one shots I wrote while I was on holiday, the other can be found on my profile!
TRIGGER WARNING: Self-harm, suicide.
And it hurt like hell. In every fibre of his body, seeing her lying there, tubes attached to her arm, her nose, her mouth. Those lips that, if she never woke, he would never get to kiss. And if he was never going to get the chance, he didn't know what to live for.
It's all your fault. It's your fault she's on the verge of death. Your fault she's halfway in her grave, barely halfway through her life. It's all you.
The voice, it was stuck in his mind. He would do anything to get it out, claw it, empty his mind, drill it out, he didn't care. Of course the voice was telling the truth, but he couldn't bear it. So he swore to pay for his sins. Even if it hurt him.
That night, he opened the drawer slowly, praying that the creaking sounds wouldn't wake his mother. He took the shining shard out of the empty drawer, and pressed it against his skin. Cold to the touch. And beautifully sharp.
One.
They were driving, and arguing over the most trivial of things. Music choices. Why, why did he have to insist. He shouldn't have. How old was he, to still be insisting to have his way. It was all his fault.
Two.
After she had turned her back on him, sulking while reluctantly listening to his country music, he had insulted her. Not just her, but her mother, and her entire family. Something that she already wasn't proud of, but the moment he said it, he regretted. It was all his fault.
Three.
A few hours later, and both had cooled down enough to discuss directions. And now they were arguing over which exit to take. He could still picture it in his head. She had screamed at him, she told him to take the scenic road, but he wanted to beat Riley and Farkle there. So he took the highway. It was all his fault.
Four.
Why did he even decide to take the car with her? He should've chosen someone else as his passenger. Riley or Farkle. Why Maya, the one he constantly argued with. Why? It was all his fault.
Five.
Several arguments later, and he had had enough. He decided to turn away from her completely. All he looked at was the road and the view on his left. She called his name. "Oh? I thought you weren't talking to me?" Then she screamed.
Bang.
It was all his fault.
Three more strikes, no- five, for good measure. He watched the blood ooze out of his skin, revelled in how it felt. But no matter what he did, he never felt like he had truly repented.
When he had woken up, he was lying in the hospital. She was the first thought that popped into his head.
"Maya. Where is she? I need to see her is she alright?"
And he could read the emotions in the doctor's eyes. He told him what had happened. A drunk driver had swerved and hit them. Maya was severely injured. Then he said those five words that killed him.
"She might not make it."
Five reasons. Five words. Five cuts. Another five. He couldn't stop, how could he? It was all his fault.
That's why he kept the shard. They had removed it from his skin, but he had asked to keep it. A single shard of glass from the window of the car. To remind him for the rest of his life. What he had done to the one he loved.
The next day, he went to the hospital. Alone. He couldn't bear to face his friends, not after what he had done to Maya. He sat by her bed the entire day, staring at her, watching her steady but slow heartbeat. Wishing that it was beating against his chest. Wishing that instead of her, it was him lying there. Wishing that if he could have any power in the world, it wouldn't be flight or invisibility or telepathy. It would be to bring her back. Back to him.
"I'll see you soon Maya. I promise." He whispered these words to her. Not that he thought she would hear them, but because he needed to hear it. He needed to know that he would see her soon. Talk to her. Be with her.
He refused to leave. Even when it was lights out and most of the staff went home. He sat by her, holding her hand, feeling every scar. There were too many. Too many for such a beautiful girl. He loved her, had been all this time. But with those scars, with the pain he had caused her, he loved her so much, it hurt.
One morning, she finally woke up. But it was not in a place she recognised. Slowly, she remembered what had happened. Car crash. Someone had swerved into her side of the car. And that's all she remembered. But where was she? She looked around, but the place was foreign to her. Taking a step forward, it was like the floor wasn't even there, like she was walking on a cloud.
In front of her, there was a door. Just a single door and its frame. Seemingly useless, but she knew it would help her somehow. She opened it and stepped inside. Immediately, her surroundings shifted.
It was a hospital. And on the bed there lay a girl. Her blonde curls fell by her side, tubes attached to every part of her body, and her face, it was pale as a ghost. Doctors and nurses were standing around the girl. She didn't want to believe it, but something told her that was her. She was looking at herself. By the side of the bed, the heart monitor showed a single flat line.
No.
It wasn't possible. She was dead.
She heard the door to the hospital open and footsteps approach. A scream. That was Riley. It was Riley's scream. She knew it when she heard it. And it was the most bonechilling scream she had ever heard from the cheerful girl. Riley broke down into her parents' arms.
Her view panned to the right, to the corner of the room. A rope hung from the top and as her eyes followed it down, she saw five knots lined along the rope. And hanging on the rope's noose was someone.
"Lucas?"
"Maya."
She swiveled around. And there he was. Looking the same as when she had last seen him, which felt like a million years ago.
"Lucas what did you do?" She asked.
He held up his wrists, and bloodied cuts lined them, 4 lines in parallel, and 1 diagonally across. 1 of these on each wrist.
"I had to pay for what I had done. I had to serve my sentence."
"So you killed yourself? Lucas, how could you?"
Lucas reached into his pocket, although Maya had no idea what they were wearing, everything they saw was just foggy. But what he pulled out of his pocket appeared to her clear as day.
A single shard of glass. Dried blood along the sharpest edge. She didn't have to be a genius to figure out that it was his blood.
"I did it for you Maya. What I did to you... It's all my fault.
"But what about our friends? We're both dead Lucas. How do you think they're feeling? We just left them!"
"It's too late for that, Maya. The moment you entered that hospital, I might as well have already been dead. Maya I waited by your bed. I waited for you to wake up, but you never did. Maya... I... I love you. And even if in this life we can't be together, then maybe in another life-"
"Lucas... You know I love you too, and part of me is glad you're here but-"
"Maya, I couldn't live without you, so instead I decided to die with you."
Hope you enjoyed it! Fave and review if you did, thanks!