The Duel that never begins.

Kaiba: Duel me Yugi!

Yami Yugi: I've got to go save my friends!

5 hours later…

Kaiba: Duel Me Yugi!

Yami Yugi: Not now!

*Runs on blimp

Kaiba: Duel me Yugi!

Yami Yugi: Your stupid bingo machine pits me against Bakura!

Kaiba: Duel me Yugi!

*Handcuffs them together

Yami Yugi: Don't we need to be on opposite sides to duel?

Kaiba: We'll duel on a table instead, or wear horse blinkers!

Note: Blinkers are those things that cover horses' eyes. People usually use them on horses so they don't look anyway but forward, like racehorses or carriage horses.

Yami Yugi: I'll wear a dog collar, but not horse blinkers! It'll obstruct my handsome features! And ruin my BEAUTIFUL hair! : P

Fan girls: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Kaiba, how can you obstruct Yami's bisshie goodness?!

Yami Yugi: I need to use the little pharaoh's room. This isn't yaoi nor hentai!

Kaiba: Since when do ghosts pee?! Egyptians didn't have bathrooms!

Yami Yugi: Since I got myself a vessel! I ain't goin' to no out house!

*Turns to little Yugi

Yugi: I gotta go! I don't run that fast and Kaiba Land only has like 2 bathrooms!

*Kaiba unlocks the handcuffs. Yugi grabs random jet pack, burns Kaiba

Kaiba: My beautiful face!

Fan girls: Beautiful face? When did that happen?

Mokuba: Oniisan, your hair…

Kaiba: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!! My beautiful silky soft hair!

Mokuba: -_-

3 days later…

Kaiba: Duel me Yugi!

Grandpa: Yugi isn't here.

Kaiba: Mokuba! Get my time machine!

Mokuba: o………………………….. Kkkk……………………….

*Drags out random machine.

Some time during Yami's reign…

Kaiba: Duel me Yugi!

Yami: Who's Yugi?

Kaiba: Duel me you fern-headed dumbass!

Yami: GUARDS!

Kaiba (as getting dragged out): HOLY SHIT! WHO THE HELL IS THAT EGYPTIAN?! PURPLE IG GAY!

Egyptian Kaiba: YOU BLEW MY COVER! I'm handsome; you're not!

Mokuba: Which is the real Onichan?!

*Egyptian Mokuba pops up and instead of carrying a briefcase, he has a wagon full of stone tablets (eeek!)

Yami: Die Set!

*Whacks Egyptian Kaiba with flail.

*Kaiba blink blink

Mokuba: Onichan, I'm scared…

Yami: DARK MAGICIAN!

*Kaiba and Mokuba and their Egyptian counterparts run for their lives.

Yami: Royal advisor, what should I do?

Royal advisor (Egyptian grandpa): GET MARRIED!

Egyptian fan girls: ME! ME! ME! ME!

Yami: Oro?

*Egyptian fan girls run after Yami.

Perverted fan girl: The time of shirtless guys in loincloths: HEAVEN!

Yami: advice?

Royal advisor: Concubines!

Yami: "Concubines"? I need a new advisor….

End 1

(I have a cute piccy that goes with this, but I haven't scanned it)