(A/N: Aha, so I got the idea to write this crack-ish story from someone I talk to on gaiaonline. We were having the most random conversation, and for some reason, it got into something like this. So, a lot of the ideas I am borrowing from him. I'll have to thank him later, cos he is awesome.

Anyway, this story. Hehe, I didn't do much introducing, but that will definitely come in the next chapter, which I'll probably write soon. I have no internet, so I guess sadly, I am not distracted! I can write!

Well…when I get the chance to. Anyway, the crack…I mean, story!)

The Great Assembling

The auditorium of the new high school filled up quickly, and voices echoed throughout it.

It had only been built the summer before, and Neliel was one of those who were greatly pleased. She sat back in her chair, practically falling asleep. She had been up late the night before, working on an assignment for a class.

Beside her was Halibel.

"Neliel, wake up." Halibel shook her lightly.

"Oh…" she frowned lightly. "I had a late night—well, you know."

"As did I." Halibel shrugged, smirking.

"Did you really? I doubt you were doing homework!"

"Of course not." Halibel snickered. "Look, Nnoitora's really staring at you."

Neliel's eyes moved over to Nnoitora, and she giggled softly. "Ever since I shared my juicebox with him in first grade he's been giving me that look."

"He's so in love with you."

"You think so?"

"Look at that, he's got that lovesick expression."

"He's such a creep sometimes, though." Neliel frowned.

"Not as bad as Aizen."

The two leaned against each other in fits of laughter.

Nnoitora could not help but to stare at Neliel. This particular day, she was wearing a short, mint green ruffled skirt that swished when she walked, and a light pink tank top that exposed the top half of her cleavage. Sure, Halibel showed off a great deal more, what with her extreme belly shirts, but Neliel was something else.

Ever since preschool, he had had a strange obsession with the girl. He had fallen in love with her in the first grade, when she shared that juice box of hers.

He sighed, and looked away. He didn't know he was in love with her.

"Nnoitora…"

"Shut the fuck up, Tesla. I didn't ask for your opinion!" Nnoitora turned and snapped Tesla's pathetic little eye patch. Maybe it had been a bit extreme of him to shoot him in the eye with a pellet gun, but it had been funny at the time.

"I just said your name…"

"Shut up!"

"Yes, sir."

"Goddamn. You might be family, but you're fucking annoying. Only thing you're good for is beating the shit out of." Nnoitora muttered. Szayel Aporro took a seat beside Nnoitora, and leered at him.

"What the fuck is with you, Szayel? You're not gay for me again, are you?"

"What would make you think that?" Szayel snickered. "You've been staring at Neliel all morning. What is it about her today? Is it the way her shirt matches her birthmark, or is it the way her skirt matches her hair? Or, is it the way her skirt swishes, or the way it shows off most of her legs?"

"Szayel, you're a sick bastard."

"Maybe it's Miss Neliel's breasts." Tesla said. Nnoitora turned bright red and looked away.

"Oh! He's blushing! Look at that!" Szayel smirked.

"Shut the fuck up! Leave me alone!" Nnoitora muttered.

Grimmjow sat in another section, with his small gang. His gang consisted of Di Roy, Il Fort Granz, Shawlong, and Nakim. "I hate these stupid fucking meetings." He grumbled to himself.

His loyal gang members immediately chanted their agreement, and he sighed.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." He whipped out his iPod and turned up some death metal to tune all the other idiots out. "Dumb fucks."

Ulquiorra sat in a corner sullenly, his eyes cast straight ahead. He was pretty much a loner, and he had never really felt the need for popularity. He would not mind being a "cool kid," but he had never made the effort.

Yammy, that fat lump, sat beside him, talking about something nonsensical.

"Yammy, please, I am thinking."

"Oh, fine." Yammy shrugged and looked away. He was also pretty much a loner, and he thought Ulquiorra was the coolest guy ever.

Ulquiorra sighed. This high school was so trashy.

Zommari sat in the back, a human size duffel bag propped up on the seat beside him. Occasionally, it would squirm and twitch a little bit, but he did not notice.

He only muttered things about "Amor" to himself as he waited for the assembly to begin.

Some of the high school students had a feeling that this school year was going to be rather insane.