sometimes you have to hurt

This is just a little something that popped up in my head. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: imuzuok does not own any of the characters mentioned in this story.

lloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOoll

Eyes

One-shot

lloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOoll

Silently, I wished it wasn't over even before it actually began. But sometimes, wishes aren't meant to come true. He was engaged to my best friend. And I had to leave for another country to pursue a dream I've always had since I was younger.

Maybe if we didn't waste so much time pretending, something good came out of it. There's nothing I can do now. I'm leaving.

I sighed at the bitter memory of our childhood. We were cold with each other. Yamato Ishida and I were not what you call the best of friends when you glance at us. But it was only, should I say, an outer performance. We had this silent agreement that we'd act like how we acted. He did not speak a single word about it, neither did I, but we understood. We felt it the moment we looked into each other's eyes the moment we met. We had the same eyes. We had, at that instant, the same urge to protect each other.

Our act? It was simply because of our image. He and I had an image we needed to protect.

My image: a spoiled princess. His image: a distant lone wolf.

oOoOoOo

It was over. Our act was over. Nothing good came out of it. Though there could've been. If only, she wasn't leaving and I wasn't engaged.

Our whole lives were just an act. If we were in the Hollywood business I would be best actor and she would be best actress. Both of us specialize in the field of acting. And only the two of us knew about it.

Mimi Tachikawa's eyes and mine are somehow alike. Our eyes both tell our story; what we really meant to say. And that's why she and I had a silent understanding. I protected her secret and she protected mine. In a sense, we protected each other.

We couldn't risk losing our image. It made us who we are.

She and I had an unspoken agreement to put that act up: resentment towards each other. It was all put up because of the image we so desperately protect.

My image: a distant lone wolf. Her image: a spoiled princess.

oOoOoOo

A spoiled princess: that is who I was known to be. I have changed despite all the safety bars I put around me. I was no longer a spoiled princess despite the entire act he and I did just for me to remain who I was, and of course, vice versa.

Now, you might be wondering why I would want to be known as such. It's simple, really. Because back then, I thought… no… WE thought if we weren't known for our image, we wouldn't be known at all. A bit selfish? Maybe? Yes?

In truth, he and I were just afraid. Afraid that once we lose our image we would lose everything.

Besides, we were happy. Yes. We were content with what we have. I had everything I ever wanted: someone who knows me. And that was Yamato Ishida.

Soon, our reason for our act turned into something more. Next thing we know, we were acting so that we won't lose our silent understanding… so that we won't lose each other.

The more we acted cold and distant with each other, the more we knew the truth: we were important to each other.

oOoOoOo

I put up an image I never wanted to put down. And she understood that. She knew everything needed to be known about me. Mimi Tachikawa was everything I wanted: someone who knows me.

I never wanted to lose my image because losing it would mean losing everything. I knew that was what she felt as well.

In the beginning we acted because of our selfish desires to be known and never to be forgotten but as time progressed, it became more than that.

We now act because losing our act would mean losing each other. And that was what exactly happened.

Sora Takenouchi: her best friend. I love her. I do. It was she who changed me from being a lone wolf to something other than that. She was the one who made me lose my act. I love her for that but somehow; I knew I wasn't entirely happy about it. I tried to put my act back together. Mimi and I tried, but I was already 'damaged' by Sora too much.

She made me drop my act which meant I lost Mimi Tachikawa. Sora isn't like Mimi. Mimi, I knew her DEEPLY. Although I don't know facts like her favorite things, I know her.

I know Sora's favorites and almost everything about her. I know because she spoke to me about it.

Mimi was talkative but she never spoke to me about things she liked and things that happen to her. But I know her well. I know her because she practically shouts it to everyone. Only nobody would hear because it can't be heard. It can only be seen.

It was in her eyes. I saw everything in her eyes. The first time I looked into her eyes, I realized everything she went through: from happiness to pain.

I know as well, that she knows me the way I know her.

Mimi Tachikawa is the ONLY ONE who really knows me.

But she changed as well.

oOoOoOo

His image crumbled down. We tried to put it back up. We really did; but Sora was just too strong. He loves Sora. That's when I lost him. I still knew him but it wasn't the same as before. There was a DEEP understanding between us. We knew each other. We KNOW each other. He knows me like no one ever does. Nothing would ever change that, but something was changed still.

He changed. I changed.

The blame can't only be concentrated to him because I was at fault as well. My act was shut down when Taichi Yagami came into picture. He is like a brother to me. And like any good brother, he tried to change my spoiled ways.

I knew I was grateful for it but I knew I didn't like it. Contradictory. Yes. My feelings were like that. I couldn't believe it: when suddenly, Yamato and I grew further apart.

It was unexpected. He and I thought our act was forever. He and I thought that we would always have each other: ONLY have each other.

But that was our biggest mistake. We were blind to the fact that we weren't the only two people in the world. We were the only two people in our world but in the real world, there were plenty.

And then our moment of confrontation came. It was the day that I was leaving for America. We were at the airport then.

I remember it all too well. He and I requested that we needed 'alone time'. Our friend's faces were of surprise and confusion. I even heard Sora and Taichi saying something like 'When did they become so close?'

And so we separated ourselves from the group. I remember looking into his eyes. It was narrating to me. For a long while neither of us spoke but we were actually communicating.

Our act is over. I'm sorry it ended that way. I thought we would last forever.

Those were ONLY some of what he had said through his eyes. Not a word was spoken. His eyes spoke for him. We have always been like that, anyway: silent but meaningful.

oOoOoOo

The day she left was the day we confronted each other. We spoke through our eyes. And as I look into her eyes I began to tell her everything as she began to tell me everything. Of course, that everything meant the others she doesn't know of yet and vice versa.

It is. I'm sorry too. I thought it would last forever as well.

Those were a few of her answers to me.

I'm partly glad and partly regretful that our act is over.

That was something I read in her eyes as well. That was also the moment I spoke.

I closed my eyes before speaking, afraid that she may see something I don't think I want her to see.

oOoOoOo

Mimi, just leave.

Those three words came from his mouth. Those were his last words to me.

He had his eyes closed so I didn't see more of what he wanted to say.

All I know is there was more to it than Mimi, just leave.

oOoOoOo

Mimi, just leave.

Those words I spoke to her directly. Those words were my last words to her.

At that moment I still had my eyes closed but I knew she was looking at me: searching for something more than those two words.

But I didn't open my eyes. Because I think she already knows enough.

She knows there's something more than those three words.

What she didn't know was what it was.

What she didn't know was the meaning behind those three words.

I love you

lloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOolllOoOoOllloOoOoll

END OF CHAPTER

I appreciate you taking time to read this.

Immensely grateful,

imuzuok