Songfic...I believe that's what this would be, right? Somewhat new to fanfiction terms.
Based on an idea from the Hidden Plot, and the fact that ToM is not about just one person.
"Don't think about the way things might have been."
And then...
"Think of the things we'll never do."
That's my belief and I'm sticking to it.
And yes, I do know this title in unoriginal. I don't know what else to call it. Give me a break.
...Ok, sorry I'm getting off track. This fic is about Christine's decision of who she wants to be with. But no matter the outcome, she wants them to think of her (obviously).
Think of Me
Christine's diary
August 25th, 1881
Choices are hard to make, especially when it is about love. How do you go about choosing without hurting someone? It seemed inevitable. But I didn't want anyone to get hurt. So instead I waited it out. Little did I know that would actually make thinks a lot harder.
Reflecting back on my earlier days, I remember an aria from the first leading role I sung. It was in the opera Hannibal and the song was called "Think of Me". This song really seemed to foreshadow my time of hard decisions I would soon endure.
"Think of me, Think
of me fondly,
When we've said goodbye
Remember me, Once in a
while,
Please promise me
you'll try."
No matter the outcome I didn't want the one I didn't choose to forget me. I loved both men in different ways, and I didn't want to lose that.
"When you find that
once again you long,
To take your heart back
and be free,
If you ever find a
moment
Spare a thought for
me."
The man I didn't choose would eventually find love, of that I was certain. He would take his heart back and find love again. But in the process I didn't want him to forget me.
I decided to think of both of them, and how the lyrics throughout this beautiful aria reflected upon each of our relationships.
"We never said our
love was evergreen,
Or as unchanging as the
sea,
But if you can still
remember,
Stop and think of me.
Think of all the things
we've shared and seen,
Don't think about the
way things might have been."
Raoul…my childhood sweetheart, my protector whenever I was afraid, my shield from the darkness, my messenger from the light.
If I were to choose my Angel …I didn't want Raoul to dwell on the things that could have come from us. But I did want him to remember all the fun times we had together. We share so many memories from the house by the sea and from our childhood in general that I don't want him to forget. Our time together is so special to me, and it would hurt me if he chose to forget it because of my decision.
"Think of me, Think
of me waking,
Silent and resigned.
Imagine me, trying too
hard
To put you from my
mind.
Recall those days, Look
back on all those times,
Think of the things
we'll never do.
There will never be a
day when,
I won't think of you!"
I had experienced waking up silent and resigned from being without my Angel. The feeling was so weird to me, almost unbearable. This happened the night I left with Raoul after the murder of Joseph Buquet.
Not hearing his voice for three months was like torture. How could I live without it? The phrase 'trying to hard to put you from my mind' is pretty much an understatement. My Angel was all I could think about for those three months, but that actually scared me.
By now I realized my decision, but there was still a big problem in the way. And that was Erik and his lifestyle. If I were to live with him I would not want it in his kingdom of darkness. I tried to call for him, telling him to think of the things we'll never do if he didn't give up the music of the night. But if he didn't give it up, I wanted him to know that there would never be a day when I wouldn't think of him.
"Flowers fade
The fruits of summer
fade
They have their season
So do we."
The birth and rebirth of all nature, it's a beautiful thing. Like nature, we all have our cycles. And it's not just about life and death, but love can fade as the flowers do only to bloom later for someone else. What I thought was love turned out to be lifeless until I realized that someone else sparked my passion back to life.
Good things come and go, and now I must decide who I will say goodbye to.
I have made my decision…
"But please promise
me that sometimes
You will think of me!"
"Maman! Destiny's crying, I think she needs to be changed." I was interrupted from my writing by my ten year old son, Gustave.
"I'll be there in a minute." I call back. Putting down my pen and journal I got up and headed for the nursery room.
My nine month old baby was lying there in her crib crying. Little Destiny was my third child, Gustave being the oldest, followed by four year old Marguerite.
"It's ok Mon ange." I said to calm the baby. While picking her up I couldn't resist kissing her tiny forehead.
I changed Destiny's diaper and placed her back in her crib and began singing to her. I didn't hear the footsteps behind me.
Soon I felt my husband's strong arms wrapping around my stomach as he pulled my body towards his. His hot breath danced across my neck igniting a familiar excitement within me. I smiled knowing his mere presence will always bring me desire and love.
"How's Destiny?" He asked.
"She's doing good, sleeping mostly. Thank God." I laughed.
He laughed with me. "Good."
We stood there together looking at our beautiful sleeping daughter. I rested the back of my head against him. He smiled down at me and said, "I love you."
"I love you too, Erik."
The End
A/N: If you review I will love you long time (lol)