Woo! Not only is this my second Supernatural story and my first Destiel story, it's also the first slash story of any kind that I've written, even though I have so many slash ships that I love. The song used is 'Hey There, Castiel', a beautiful parody of 'Hey There, Delilah' (by the Plain White T's), by sunnySniper on soundcloud. I highly recommend looking it up! And if you want to know what Dean's singing sounds like, look up Jensen Ackles' covers of 'Angeles' or 'The Weight' on youtube. Both are gorgeous.
I don't own Supernatural, 'Hey There, Castiel', sunnySniper, 'Hey There, Delilah', Plain White T's, 'Angeles', 'The Weight', or Jensen Ackles.
000
Castiel stumbled down the road. Not much further now… He had initially thought that the best thing he could do was try to help his fallen brothers and sisters, but after being forced to kill several of them in self-defense, he had realized that the best option was actually to lay low at the Men of Letters bunker, as Dean had told him to do that first and only time he had called after falling. Something inside rebelled against just calling Dean and asking for the hunter to take him to the bunker, and so he walked, occasionally hitchhiking, and just trying to keep away from other angels. But now he was in Lebanon, Kansas, he was finally almost at their door, he was finally almost back to Dean, and it was so worth all the fights, all the exhaustion, all the scrounging for food and water, everything. He was almost there. He could actually see the small hill that concealed the bunker, and the set of concrete steps leading down to the door, and despite the late hour and his lack of a decent night's sleep in over a week, new energy filled his legs and he walked a little faster.
Drawing closer, Cas could also make out the dark shape of someone sitting on the top step, holding a large object, their head bowed. The soft strains of music fell on his ears, chords leading into a song he had heard once or twice before, and he realized that the person was holding a guitar, not just holding it, playing it, and very well, too. From the direction he was coming, the person was facing away from him, and didn't notice as the former angel walked closer, his steps slowing until he stopped about ten feet behind the achingly familiar back and hunched shoulders. Dean drew in a breath and, to Cas' surprise, started singing, quietly but sweetly and clearly heartfelt.
"Hey there, Castiel, well, I am sure you've heard me callin'," Dean sang, and for a moment, Cas was sure that the hunter knew he was there. But Dean almost never called him by his full name, and he remembered that the original song was called 'Hey There, Delilah', and so his full name fit the opening line better than his nickname. But then that just brought up the question as to why Dean was singing about him. "You're a thousand miles away, but still, somehow I know you're listening, you must be."
Cas' lips twitched, torn between smiling and frowning at the lyrics.
"What's Free Will's point if I'm not free? 'Cause you've trapped me."
His heart clenched slightly at that. Surely Dean didn't mean what Cas thought he meant.
"Hey there, Castiel, why'd you bother pulling me out? 'Cause without you I'm right back in Hell, and frankly, I'd take burning over this," Dean's head bowed a little lower, "All of my prayers you just dismiss. But it's you I miss."
Cas' head dropped to stare at his feet, shame welling up inside of him. He could have called, could have come sooner, but had refused to for his own foolish reasons.
"Oh, why won't you answer me?" Dean sang pleadingly, and Cas' heart ached. "No, why won't you answer me? Oh, why won't you answer me? No, why won't you answer me? Please just answer me…" Cas took a small step forward, intent on revealing himself, but Dean started the next verse and he lost his nerve.
"Hey there, Castiel, you know all things fall apart," Cas blinked against the strange prickling in his eyes and the voice in his head that was insisting that not everything falls apart, not this, whatever this was. "It's unavoidable, it happens, cities rise and fall like art, but you still hoped. For years we've clung onto this rope, we've hung 'till choked." Cas certainly felt choked right then, a lump rising in his throat to accompany the uncomfortable prickling behind his eyelids.
"Hey there, Castiel, I've still got so much left to say," Dean's voice was starting to sound a little rough, like there was a lump in his throat, too, but he pushed past it and kept singing. "If every little prayer I sent to you could erase this all away, I'd send them all," he swallowed, still strumming the guitar strings, "Then you wouldn't ever have to fall, you'd still have it all."
There was something wet on Cas' cheek. He reached up and touched it, looking at his hand to discover a single drop of water trembling on his finger. Angels don't cry, it's physically impossible…but apparently fallen ones can.
"Oh, why can't you answer me?" Dean continued on into the chorus, "No, why can't you answer me? Oh, why can't you answer me? No, why can't you answer me?" Again, Cas almost spoke up, but Dean rushed into the next verse with barely a pause and Cas was reluctant to break the spell.
"Cas, it's been now much too long, for me this once, just play along," The words were tumbling out faster, but still clear, still powered by the same heartfelt emotion as they had been since the beginning. "I need to know if you're going to be okay. Our friends are trying to be strong, but on their faces, it's clear as dawn, that none of them had wanted it this way." Cas felt a brief flash of pain for Sam and Kevin and Bobby and the others, but his attention was focused back on Dean as he continued singing.
"Cas, now things are getting rough, yesterday's hope won't be enough. Come morning, I will never be same, and you're to blame." Dean's voice echoed slightly against the hills and surrounding trees as it rose in volume and power, and Cas wondered if the so-called change in the morning was a good thing or not.
"Hey there, Castiel, well I'm sure you've heard me calling," Dean repeated the first line at a softer volume than the previous one, "You're a thousand miles away, and now I know that you're not listening. Now I see. Once I deigned to call you family," Cas felt a bolt of fear rush through him, did Dean not want him? He was only slightly soothed by the next line. "Still I need you like you needed me." But he was powerless now – what could Dean possibly need him for?
"Hey there, Castiel, can't you see?" The next lines came as if in answer to Cas' anxious thoughts. "You set me free." Dean had been the one to teach Cas about free will, though, Dean had been the one to set Cas free, not the other way around.
"Oh, why won't you answer me?" Dean launched into the chorus once more, his voice taking on a bittersweet tone that went straight to Cas' heart. "No, why won't you answer me? Oh, why won't you answer me? No, why won't you answer me?
"Please just answer me…" Dean's voice faded out, the guitar following a few moments later. The song over, Cas finally found himself with a chance to speak up, as though in answer to the last line.
"Hello, Dean."
000
I think I'll just leave it like that, unless someone wants to beta for me? I still feel like I haven't gotten a real good grasp on writing Cas' character, and would really like some help! If there's enough interest and a beta available, I'll probably try to continue this.