Title: Beauty and the Beast
Author: Sweet Dreams
Fandom: Everwood
Rating: G (mild violence and beer – like in the Disney movie O_O)
Genre: Romance/Parody
Pairing: Ephram/Amy (+mild Colin/Bright and Irv/Edna)
Summary: This is what happens when the cast of Everwood becomes the cast of Disney's Beauty and the Beast… :P
Disclaimer: Everwood belongs to the WB and Beauty & the Beast belongs to Disney. I own nothing but the writing.
Author's Note: AU – Alternate Universe: Not like the setting on the TV show. It's Everwood – Fairy tale style…set in the past. Basically it's just the Disney story with the cast of Everwood playing the roles of the Disney characters. (If you thought the movie was cheesy, or you have never seen the movie; don't read this.) I thought it'd be funny to write a parody of this because I love this movie and I love Everwood…there's nothing more to say. =)
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Chapter 1 – Looks can be Deceiving
Irv is narrating in the background
Once upon a time in a faraway land, (Everwood, Colorado to be specific) a young gothic prince lived in a shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired, the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind.
During one stormy winter's night an old beggar woman came to the castle and offered a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter cold. Repulsed by her haggard appearance; the prince sneered at the gift and turned the old woman away. But she warned him not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within. And when he dismissed her again, the old woman's ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress.
The prince tried to apologize but it was too late, for she had seen that there was no love in his heart. And as punishment – she transformed him into a hideous beast and placed a powerful spell on the castle and all who lived there.
Ashamed of his monstrous form – the beast concealed himself inside his castle with a magic mirror as his only window to the outside world. The rose she had offered was truly an enchanted rose which would bloom until his sixteenth year. If he could learn to love another and earn her love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time.
As the years passed, he fell into despair and lost all hope…for who could ever learn to love a beast…
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Amy Abbott was the most beautiful girl in town…but she was also the oddest. There was so much going through her mind on this nice, ordinary day as she stepped outside her cottage home into the warm sunshine.
The birds chirped and fluttered nearby as she crossed the bridge to go into town. She sighed; bored by the look on her face as she walked past the crowd. They would whisper amongst themselves whenever she walked by. Saying things like, "It's that strange girl again; she's always with her head in the clouds…" …Though Amy was used to it.
She just didn't seem to fit in here; her heart was set on bigger horizons—she was tired of this boring little place; she wanted excitement—adventure…Little did she know that was just about to head her way.
She entered Everwood's book shop. "Good morning, Amy." The old bookkeeper greeted.
"Morning, sir. I've come to return the book I've borrowed." She handed him her book. "Have you got anything new?" She asked as she searched the bookcase.
"Not since yesterday." The old man chuckled merrily.
"Hmm…I'll take this one." She grabbed a book with a lilac cover.
"That one? But you've read it twice!" He exclaimed with a twinkle in his eye.
"I know. But it's my favorite." Amy smiled innocently at him.
"Well if you like it so much, it's yours."
"Really? Oh, you are much too kind. Thank you!" She waved bye at the old, merry man before heading out the door. Unable to resist, she opened the book and read while she walked. It was a classic fairy tale about a prince and princess falling in love…she was too engrossed with her story to pay attention to the crowd's usual whispering, pointing and staring.
Suddenly a gunshot was heard; someone had fired at a flock of geese that were flying south. A goose fell from the sky—Bright held up a bag to try to catch it, he missed—but it fell on the ground next to him. He picked up the dead bird and put it in the bag. Then he ran to Colin, who was leaning against the wall of a building; blowing the smoke that emitted from his hunter's rifle.
"Wow! Colin you didn't miss a single shot! You're the greatest hunter in the whole world!" Bright exclaimed with far too much glee.
"I know." Colin grinned and started walking away in an arrogant, stuck-up way—chin up, with a smug look on his handsome face.
Bright followed behind, "No beast stands a chance against you…" Bright laughs. "…And no girl for that matter."
Colin grins evilly. "It's true. And I've got my sights set on that one." He points his rifle at Amy and hugs Bright close to his chest.
"The Doctor's daughter?!" Bright asks loudly; surprise clearly registered on his face.
"She's the one. The lucky girl I'm going to marry." Colin lets go of Bright as he stares at Amy, who's standing close by buying food from a street shop.
Bright began to protest, "But she--"
"The most beautiful girl in town." Colin interrupted, as he slicked back his black, wavy hair. "That makes her the best." He throws his rifle and hits Bright in the face.
"OW!" Bright rubs his face where he felt the pain.
"Don't I deserve the best?" Colin asks; grabbing Bright by the shirt collar and sneering in his face.
Bright nods nervously. "Well, of course you do…but she's my sister and--"
Colin shoves Bright away. "Right from the moment when I met her I said, 'She's gorgeous' and I fell. Here in town she's the only person who is beautiful as me, so I'm making plans to woo and marry her." He glanced at his reflection in the back of a pan that was hanging in one of the street shops, grinning at himself. Then Amy walked by; still intrigued with her book.
Colin started to follow her, shoving his way past the crowded streets. A group of blonde triplets were infatuated with him as he walked by. "He's so handsome." One of them declared, fanning herself.
"I think he's single." Another one said.
Colin ignored the ladies and kept struggling to get to Amy. The crowd was so thick, that he had to take drastic measures and climb atop the roofs of some buildings to get past. When he finally did, he jumped down in front of Amy. "Hello Amy."
Amy looked up from her book. "Hello Colin." They were standing on the outskirts of the town.
Without warning, Colin snatched the book out of her hands.
A look of anger flashed over Amy's pretty face. "Colin, may I have my book back, please." She tried to reach for the book as Colin flipped through the pages.
"How can you read this? There are no pictures, man." Colin stared at the book like he didn't understand what he was looking at.
Amy crossed her arms over her chest. "Well some people use their imagination; something that you desperately lack…" She raised an eyebrow at him suspiciously.
Colin looked perplexed. He threw the book out of the way; it landed in a puddle of muddy water. "It's about time you got your head out of these books and paid attention to more important things--"
Amy got down on the cobblestone floor and was about to grab her book, but Colin rudely blocked her path. "—Like me. The whole town is talking about it. It's not right for a woman to read. Soon she starts getting ideas…and thinking…" Colin screwed up his face and shook his head.
Amy reached around him, grabbed her book, stood up, and using her apron, she started wiping the grimy water off the book's cover. "Colin, you are positively primeval."
Colin chuckled and put his arm around her. "Why thank you, Amy. What do you say we take a walk to my tavern and take a look at some of my trophies?" He started leading her back into town.
"Maybe some other time." Amy replied.
They walked by the triplets from before. "What's wrong with her?" One said.
"She's crazy!" The other replied.
"He's gorgeous." The third said, with a far off dreamy look.
Amy removed Colin's arm off her. "Please Colin. I can't. I have to get home to help my father. Good bye." She started to walk away.
Bright suddenly appeared. He stood next to Colin; laughing. "That crazy old loon? He needs all the help he can get." He started laughing. Soon after, Colin started to laugh also.
Amy turned around to face them; placing her hands on her hips. "Don't talk about my father that way! Bright, you used to live with us…he's your father too."
Colin stopped laughing; angrily stared at Bright, and knocked him on the head. "Yeah, don't talk about her father that way!"
"My father is not crazy. He's a genius. He's saved so many of the townspeople's lives…you have no right to speak of him in that manner." She turned around and ran home…Colin and Bright started cracking up together when she left.
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To Be Continued…