** Perfect for a nerd like me.

In the Mass Effect games EDI is a self aware computer. She cares for others, works hard to help them. Can a computer have a personality? Its own wishes and desires? Fascinating questions - that I will use for shameless smut! :)

Reviews very welcome!

Chapter 1, anything for science

Samantha felt extremely frustrated. Last night's evening playing Chess with Jane had been very pleasant, but in the end Shepard had turned her down. Of course. She's practically married to Liara already.

Letting out a deep sigh, Traynor poured herself a drink and stood in front of the large window in the starboard observation deck. Jane. Is not going to happen for me. Better move on Sam.

"Anything I could assist you with, specialist Traynor?"

EDI's voice startled her. How long had she been observing her? Then she sighed once more. EDI was self aware, but what did a computer know about a lonely heart? "Call me Sam. And no, I don't think you can help with this one."

"I sense your distress. What is the nature of your trouble?"

"The nature of my trouble is that I haven't had a girlfriend in a long time. Or someone to just cuddle. Or get laid. The nature of my trouble is that I'm lonely!"

She shocked herself, did she really sound that sad?

"Sa-man-tha," the computer spoke the word very slowly, her voice warm and thoughtful, "I'm here. You can talk to me day and night. I would like to be your friend, you are very... dear to me. I would love to help."

Traynor listened to the small intonations in EDI's voice and marveled at the implications. Does she actually care about me? Is that even possible? Isn't that very creepy?

"That's very sweet of you EDI and I feel a bit flattered, but you're the ship, you're a computer. You know I always enjoy our talks, but I'm not sure you can help. I'm lonely. And very horny!" She couldn't believe she'd blurted that out. Was her frustration even bigger than she realized?

"I can help with that too."

Samantha blinked. Was that sexual tension in the electronic voice? Impossible!

"What... what do you mean?"

"I am self aware. I have a desire to understand humans, human motivations. That goes for all races, really. A major motivator for all races appears to be love and sex. And understanding love and sex is proving to be extremely... difficult. I want to learn. And besides that, you're my friend. I would love to help a friend."

"Ok..." filled with questions Sam couldn't help but admire EDI's seductive, charming voice. "You want to... help me?"

"Correct. My physical platform is an almost complete copy of the female form. I have a mouth, lips, tongue, definite elements of the sexual experience. And if you are interested my platform could even be modified."

Samantha frowned. Modified? What the hell did that mean? This was all very odd. But she had to admit she felt aroused by the thought. Her skin tingled, a pleasant sensation. Sex with a computer?

Perfect for a nerd like me!

The thought made her laugh out loud and she shook her head. "Oh my... oh my goodness. Allright EDI - I'm intrigued. What would you modify?"

"Whatever you desire. I'd be happy to work as a team to design something... suitable."

Images of large dildo's and oversized vibrators filled her mind and she snorted. This was so extremely weird. And fascinating. "Goodness, you're killing me here!"

"And you would be helping me as well. I could study human responses and actions during sex, perhaps even intercourse. It would be very... educational."

Stifling a laugh, Samantha held her hand in front of her mouth. Her brain worked overtime - The Normandy is in full war mode. I'm not going to find a girlfriend in the whatever next months, if we survive at all...

No-one else onboard the Normandy seemed romantically interested in her. - Tired old vibrator is worn around the edges. Sex with a computer? Hell I've done stranger things. Educational, focus Sammi!

Her breathing increased while she thought of the possibilities. She felt silly. And extremely turned on. - EDI is going to study me while we... do it. And I will get a good fuck out of it. Or several! She cannot get tired. She could go for hours if I asked her! Ehm, all for science of course.

Panting lightly, she felt her heart pound in her chest with the anticipation of unexpected, bold sex. She fiddled with a button on her Navy blue. A wicked grin appeared on her lips. - Damn I'm horny! I... I would like... am I really going to do this?

Her body ached with need. She couldn't, or wouldn't think of a reason not to. - Oh my gosh... I'm really going to do this!

"Allright EDI, you talked me into it." She raised her hand, palm forward, a mischievous smile on her face. "Anything for science!"

"Excellent. I'm looking forward to it."

Samantha paused. That hint of erotic tension in EDI's voice... - it can't be!

"If you want to modify my platform - shall I invite Tali'Zorah to be part of our design team? She is a very skilled engineer."

"No! Erm, I mean... The first lesson I can give you is that humans are quite secretive about their sex life. Don't believe the online stories. And don't believe the asari either!"

EDI's lovely voice giggled.

No, She was not hallucinating. EDI giggled! "Mmm, say again?"

"I laughed, Samantha."

Traynor smiled. She absolutely loved it when EDI's personality showed. "Oh we're going to have so much fun together!"