A:N: Hello, a new fic for you all. My version of Bill and Fleur's wedding, set to Panic! At The Disco's 'I write sins, not tragedies.' I own neither the song or the book. Here we go.

Sin or Tragedy?

Oh, well imagine, as I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor,
and I can't help but to hear, no I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words:'

A murmur goes up as Fleur walks down the aisle, arm in arm with her father, shining in all her veela glory.

She kisses her father on the cheek and joins Bill At the alter, at the front of the garden.

"What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!" says a bridesmaid to a waiter.
"And yes, but what a shame, what a shame, the poor groom's bride is a whore."

Ginny and Gabrielle, Fleur's two bridesmaids, step to the side as the priest begins.

'Dearly Beloved…'

Ginny sighs.

'What a beautiful wedding.' She says to herself, only wishing it could be hers.

Fred overhears and can't resist commenting; 'what a shame the poor groom's bride is a whore;

I'd chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

'We will now…' The priest gets cut off.

'Stop the wedding.'

Viktor Krum runs down the aisle to drop down on his knees in front of Fleur.

'I love you.' He says.

A muffled scream comes from Fleur, who yanks Viktor up by his collar and slaps him. Bill and Charlie, Bill's best man, stand there, mouths wide open.

I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of...

Molly gets up and closes her two eldest sons' jaws. She ushers them out.

'Come along you two.' She says.

Bill and Charlie follow her into the Burrow.

Well in fact, well I'll look at it this way, I mean technically our marriage is saved
well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne.

Fred and George look at each other and smirk.

'This calls…' Fred starts

'…For a toast.' George finishes, as they levitate champagne glasses, filled to the brim, to everyone in the garden.

'To Bill and Fleur's marriage.' Fred says.

'It is saved.' Says George.

The twins drink up and usher everyone else to do the same.

Oh! Well in fact, well I'll look at it this way, I mean technically our marriage is saved
Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne, pour the champagne.

Gabrielle, Fleur's little sister, runs out of the garden in tears.

Harry chases her screaming; 'Sugarplum, come back!'

Ginny looks shocked and races after Harry. 'I thought you loved me!' she says, with tears in her eyes.

'No, I'm with Gabrielle.' Harry says flatly.

Ginny screams as Fred and George leave, howling 'Auld Lang's Syne' at the tip-tops of their voices.

Ginny runs over to a tree and starts kicking it. Harry only shrugs and goes running into a maze to find Gabrielle.

I'd chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Ron turns to Hermione. 'I have to be honest with you,' He says. 'I'm gay.'

Hermione sighs, her face flooded with relief. 'I'm a lesbian. I love Luna.' She says, pointing to the blonde, who is standing on a chair, preaching about the end of the world, as people start fighting with chairs.

'I love Cedric.' Ron says.

Hermione looks at Ron for a moment, and then shrugs.

'Wanna make out?' She asks sincerely.

I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Again...

It is now Ron's turn to shrug.

'OK' He says, then rugby tackles Hermione to the ground as sparks fly in the air and Cedric crawls out from under the alter screeching; 'Can I come out now?!' To the crowds of fighting people.

I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Fleur wakes up with a start. She is drenched in sweat, her golden bangs stuck to her forehead.

'Oh la la.' She says to herself as she climbs out of bed.

'Zat'll teach moi not to 'ave cheeze befor' bed.'

I'd chime in, "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Again...