Author's Notes: Greetings all! Alright so I decided to do a crossover of TF2 and Gate: Jieitai Kanochi Nite Kaku Tatakaeri because it seemed like a good idea in my head. I've only seen one fanfic of it and it's from KIllahKimSter (dat name doh) which was last updated in 2016. Pretty sad that it was abandoned and i'm not really going to expect if not a lot attention is given to this story but it's been in my head ever since I read their fanfic and inspired me to make one of my own. And yes, I watched and read several manga chapters of Gate before but it was a long time ago so this chapter will start out with the RED Mercs though I won't spoil much details. While all that's happening, i'm going to try and get more ideas while at the same time researching the characters of Gate so I would get use to their personalities and stuff like that.

Another important thing to note is that chapter 2 and beyond will follow the episodes starting at episode 3. Second author's note is at the bottom. New chapters are published once per month or two. That's about it here, hope you enjoy the first chapter!

Disclaimer: I do not own TF2 and Gate: Jieitai Kanochi Nite Kaku Tatakaeri. Oh and I also do not own the cover art.

Coal Town, night time

It's 1972 and the Robot Wars has finally ended in RED team's victory. Ever since the rise of Gray Mann's robots, the members of BLU team joined forces with RED team in order to avoid confusion amongst themselves and fight alongside them to stop Gray from taking over Mann Co. Then they fought the Team Fortress Classics hired by Gray Mann to locate the Administrator and the supply cache of Australium. Turns out, Gray has f-ed up from the very beginning as the TFC Heavy kills him by forcingly pull off the life-extending machine from Gray's back, killing him slowly. RED team fought from hell and back to keep their jobs and eventually succeed in doing so as all of the TFC are killed with the last being the TFC Heavy. Now that all threats towards Mann Co. are gone and Saxton Hale regaining control of Mann Co. from Olivia Mann, the mercenaries decided to party right outside of one of the Mann Co. facilities namely Coal Town to celebrate their victory.

This was something they all had enjoyed from killing each other repeatedly in the past to the Robot War. They all felt like a big family of friends... well, an insane one that is but they didn't care as they cheered around the campfire Pyro made. They danced the Kazotsky kick, the Mannrobics, you name it! Soldier, who stopped dancing loaded his rocket launcher with fireworks and shot up into the air while shouting "'MERICA!". The rockets exploded revealing patterns from which you would see on a daily basis to the logos of each class. Scout's logo all the way towards Spy's logo. The whole team stopped dancing, grabbed some beers from the Demoman's crate of bottles and sat around the campfire to look up to at the fireworks. Pyro, who didn't grab any since he can't drink from his mask is the one enjoying the fireworks the most out of everyone. I wonder what he's seeing what we can't... Ah, doesn't matter. Back to the awesome party the mercs were having.

"Gentleman!" Spy started talking as if he would be giving a big speech. "It was an honor to fight alongside you all against evil wizards, the Headless Horseless Horseman, a large goddamn eyeball that shoots explosive eyeballs, hell even each other!"

The mercs agreed with Spy as flashbacks went from RED vs BLU fighting each other. Then, when it was halloween, they would do the same thing except that the souls are given to Merasmus' relic or whatever crazy shit the wizard brought with him.

"The worst of the worst was the Robot Wars! We, just a band of mercenaries fighting over the badlands are capable enough to stop over thousands of robots and even millions just to keep our jobs! Then we fought the imposters that think they were better than us! It was by far the most stupidest and worst experience of my life." Spy then raised his bottle of beer. "Cheers, everyone!" And with that, the mercs drank more as they all continued celebrating. Just then, Saxton Hale came to where the mercs were celebrating.

"Oh hey guys! Look, it's Mistah Hale! Wanna join in on the celebration? We got drinks over d'ere!" Scout asked Saxton if he wanted join in on their celebration.

"No thanks boys! In fact, I'm here to tell you that you are all fired! Now you best leave since you're in my way of Coal Town being reconstructed!" Everyone went silent after that but they knew this was coming as they had nothing left to fight and they wouldn't want to fight the strongest man in the world so they headed into the buildings that had the upgrade stations inside to pack up their belongings and leave.

"Oh yeah, I don't need that van anymore so you can take em' otherwise, they'd be scrapped." Saxton Hale pointed to the Red Bread van with Sniper's campervan is also parked next to it.

Some of the mercs just grumbled while others sighed as they made their way towards the vehicles and loaded their belongings. They knew this would happen as they have no one else to fight but never expected it to be so soon. With a wave of goodbye from Saxton Hale himself, they drove off on the empty road. After several minutes of silent driving, Engie decided to contact his team through a built-in radio call modification he made so he could communicate with the mercs of what they would be doing next. The Red Bread van and Sniper's campervan are also equipped with a built-in radio mod so they could just talk from there without having to pick up their blocky phone while simultaneously driving.

"So... What you boys going do now that we're fired?" Engie gave the obvious question. Heavy responded to his question first. "Heavy will have family move to America so they be safe. Soviet Russia is dangerous now."

"Haha! America is the best place for everyone! Even for those who were our enemies that decided to join us! Excellent choice comrade!" Soldier expressed. After all, he is a total American patriot. An insane one that is.

"I be returning back to Scotland and continue drinking whiskey from there lads. Though me mum would start bickering me again to get a new job." Demoman said as he thought fearfully about his mom's reaction of him losing his job and the bickering to start all over again.

"Yeah, kinda agree with you on that one. Though my moms' not going to be worried about me losing my job since we all did get payed a lot." Scout answered next. He can imagine himself just throwing stacks of money everywhere when he gets back home.

"Scout is right. At least we have been paid for our services. For me, i'll be heading back to my home country and spend the rest of my life there. Vive la France." Spy answered and actually agreed with Scout for once though Scout still didn't know that he is his dad which Spy was thankful for.

As they continued driving, the wind started to change as if a chill went up your spine, the sound of a cat meowing loudly could be heard, and the night started to become a bit more foggy. The mercs stopped onto the side of the road as they got out of their vehicles and took out of their weapons seemingly out of nowhere just in case. Good thing they did because a portal opened up to reveal none other than...

"GREETINGS MORTALS! IT IS I, MERASMUS! Oh and hello Soldier." Merasmus said as he appeared from a portal he summoned.

"Damn it Merasmus! Get out here!" Soldier answered. The appearance of the wizard had the mercs hide behind their vehicles for cover, getting ready to fight the wizard once more like they've done in the past. The mercs also threw in some usual insults at Merasmus to make it their final battle before parting ways.

"Nobody likes wizards, ya hear me? You're doomed to die alone!"

"Mphm!"

"Yer magic is weak, old man!"

"Heavy and friends will kill wizard, again!"

"You done incurred my wrath, wizard!"

"Schweinehunde!"

"I'm gonna blow the inside of ya head all over four counties!"

"Gentleman, Let's give this wretch his final reward!"

"Fools! Merasmus has enough of you ruining his life and so has come to take away your souls in a blink of an eye! This time with a new spell I invented!" Merasmus then used his staff and pointed at the mercs and with the magic words "Babmo Bibrundo!" he casted the spell. However, when the spell was casted, it didn't kill the mercs and take their souls instantly, it opened what seemed to be a portal similar to whenever MONOCULUS summons it but this one was different as it was colored green and a little smaller. The portal then got bigger and started pulling anything into it as if someone forgot to turn off the damn vacuum.

"Son of a cussing cuss word!" As Soldier felt himself being dragged in before Scout and Sniper did their best to pull him back until they started to get pulled in as well. Scout started to panic from the invincible force that's pulling the three of them in. "It's happening! Oh god it's happening!"

"Wait, wait what?" Merasmus thought in confusion as the spell he casted was suppose to take their souls instantly but instead it's pulling them into a portal. He looked through the Bombinomicon to see what he did wrong but it didn't seem like it so he just fled by summoning a portal to Skull Island thinking they would be transported to Hell or somewhere he could collect their souls, pretty much ditching the team entirely.

"Farewell, mortals! Merasmus will see you in hell!"

Scout, Soldier, and Sniper went through the portal but it didn't end there as the rest of the team started to get dragged in as well.

"Everyone, RUN!" Medic yelled as the rest of the team immediately tried to make a 180 in order to get far from the portal. The retreating mercs were slowly being dragged in to share their fate alongside the first three mercs.

"Oh no, Help! Help me!" Medic yelled as the portal took him in followed with Pyro's mumbles and Demoman believing he must be drunk for this to be happening.

"Wot n' tarnation! What dumb sonuvabitch cast that!" Engineer yelled until he got sucked in as well along with Heavy with "Ohhh nooo!"

Spy being the last one quickly tries to make a run for it but not when the portal strengthened its grip as he starts to get pulled in just like everyone else. This also pulled in the vehicles the mercs were using for cover. "No, no, no no, non, nein, nyet!…" Spy quickly panicked in any language he knew (after all, he is the Spy meant to infiltrate bases all over the world though it is unknown which countries Spy infiltrated.) Unfortunately for him, he finally got pulled in though just like the rest of his team.

"Sacre bleu."

Somewhere in the Special Region, seemingly morning already

Spy being the last one out of the portal lands on top of the already piled up team as they couldn't get out of the way in time before someone else falls right on top of them. Heavy just pushed everyone off his back also angering Scout in the progress.

"Argh! Goddamnit lard fat! Watch it!" Scout told Heavy angrily to which he responded by bitch-slapping Scout in the face with his huge hands. This in turn caused the whole team excluding Spy, Engie, and Pyro to throw the usual insults and brawling at each other. Spy and Engie took a look around their surroundings to see the beautiful green landscape, a fuck-ton of trees and forests, and where they landed seems to be a man-made dirt road instead of the empty desert they were use to. Pyro saw a few butterflies flying over a few grass and quickly ran up to it as it sat with its hands to support its head.

"Damn. It's already mornin' and this place is a lot more different than what we saw before." Engie said as he was amazed by the terrain.

"Eat more veggies, fatty!" Scout said insulting Heavy. "Drink more milk, little man!" Heavy countered." The team were still bickering much to the annoyance of Spy as he pulled out his revolver and shot it up in the air, causing the team to stop fighting and look at Spy.

"Gentleman, please! why don't you take a look around you and tell me where we are?" Spy ordered while he took a cigarette out of the Spytron 3000 and had it lit.

"Oh I know where we are! We are at... at... uh..." Scout struggled to answer as the team also looked around trying to find out where they were.

"I believe ve are in Soviet Russia due to ze large amounts of forests and trees here." Medic theorized (remember 1970s).

"THIS IS NOT GOOD!" Soldier yelled out all of a sudden. "WE ARE IN THE HEART OF SOVIET RUSSIA AND THEY COULD BE KNOCKING ON OUR DOOR ANY SECOND NOW! WE MUST PROTECT THE GOOD OF DEMOCRACY AND THE PROUD COUNTRY OF THE UNITED STATES!"

"Calm down, Soldier boy. I'm sure we're in America!" Engineer said as he assured Soldier from deciding to kill anything that he thought was Communist though Engie was pretty sure that in his mind that this was not America.

"Where in da hell did Hoodini take us to now?" Scout simply asked the most obvious question.

"Well, wherever we are, we ain't on the usual ground mates. But I ain't walking for miles without my van." And just right when Sniper finished his sentence, the portal opened up again but this time now on the side of the dirt road and teleported their vehicles.

"Oh, vhat a coincidence, Sniper!" Medic called out.

Author's Notes: And that is the end of the first chapter! Next chapter will have the characters of Gate and TF2 fighting the Flame Dragon. Ok now I realized the huge problem between TF2 and Gate which were the languages they both speak.

Obviously, the mercs speak in English while the JSDF speak in Japanese so this means I would have all of the characters except the people that are native to the Special Region speak English though the realism of the story would be non-existent as of course the JSDF speaks Japanese and them speaking English somehow fairly easily is pretty weird and I won't have Spy know Japanese since like stated above, it's unknown what countries Spy raided though he'll probably learn it the fastest (I hope you all are okay with this.) That's all I have to say for now. If you've gone this far reading the author's notes, then I thank you for that. I hope you enjoyed the chapter and have a good day (I really need to write more.) -PootisHeavy

Okay so this text is where I just update on what's going on and to show you that I'm not dead (obviously). You can skip it or read it, your choice.

Edit: Okay from the reviews, it kind of seems like the JSDF can speak English though not many can so I guess I can let the JSDF speak English. I'll probably have the JSDF be in training to learn English or something. xd

Edit as of 1/13/19: I made this chapter much easier to read by separating quotes because it seemed like a huge paragraph and it was a pain in the ass to read. I would also apologize for not updating the story since I needed some time for myself so I could clear my head.

Another thing is that side characters like Saxton Hale, Miss Pauling, and other side characters WILL NOT be in future chapters due to the already huge amount of characters so I apologize to anyone who wanted to see them especially Saxton Hale. (Though I might reconsider this but chances of that are very slim.)

Edit as of 3/8/19: Right... It's been months and I haven't updated the story which I'll explain to you why. It's been due to my self doubt in my writing which started to affect my motivation to continue writing greatly and my mood hasn't been great over the past 3 months. Now, the story will continue but updates will take considerable time. I deeply apologize to all of you who had been waiting for the next chapter. Sorry everyone.

Update as of 5/31/19: Good day everyone! No, this story IS NOT dead and school is over for the summer so thats a "yay" for that. Anyway, I got out of that mood and the second chapter is coming along nicely (I think ;-;). Seriously, the first draft of the second chapter after I came back a few days ago was absolutely shit and super rushed to the point I had to make a new one. Oh, and since school is over for the summer, updates should be coming in a lot more quickly this time. I apologize for holding this story for so long. Have a good day.