Okay, this is just a short one off piece. What if, when Ianto told Jack that ' I have missed that coat' in CoE, Rhys did go down to the bay for the computer disks.

What If…

Sitting at the computers in the 'Hub 2' warehouse, Ianto and I chatted.

"What did it feel like. I mean, gettin' blown up?" Ianto asked me.

"Wasn't the best of days."

"No, but, did you feel it? Or did everything just go blank?"

"I felt it."

"Shit." He looked away.

"Yeah."

"D'ya ever think that one day your luck will run out? That you won't come back?"

"I'm a fixed point in time and space, that's what the Doctor says. I think that means it's forever."

"So, one day you will see me die, of old age and just keep goin'?"

"Yeah."

"We better make the most of it then."

"I suppose." I turned back to the computer screen.

"Like right now?"

I smiled. "Ianto, the world could be ending."

"The world's always ending, and I have missed that coat."

I had to smile. I turned to face Rhys.

"Rhys, do you wanna take the car and go to the shops down by the wharf. We need some disks for these things. Should take about 20 minutes."

"Thirty minutes." said Ianto.

"Thirty."

"Okay. Let me turn the beans off." Rhys turned off the electric and placed the saucepan on the side. "I always wanted to drive a car like that." Rhys smiled. "Can I take her for a spine?"

Ianto smiled at me.

"Sure. No rush." I told him.

Yes

"Thanks."

Rhys left.

Ianto and I were alone.

Standing, Ianto offered me his hand. I took it. He lead me back to the couch we had been sitting on earlier.

As we sat, Ianto took off his jacket, carefully lying it on the floor.

I watched his every movement. He fascinated me. Still not quite sure of his new sexuality. Of being with another man. Still shy and naïve.

"I….was afraid….with the bomb inside you. I thought….you might not come back from this one."

Ianto sat beside me. I took him into my arms.

"I told you, I could live through anything." I smiled, putting him at ease.

He lowered his gaze. "I guess, I thought, maybe….this time would be different."

I began to unbutton his waistcoat.

"I was relieved and amused to see you walk out of all that cement." Ianto confessed.

"Mmmm, I just bet you were."

I began to undo his tie, then the buttons on his shirt.

His fear forgotten, or at least put aside, Ianto started to undress me.

I stood Ianto up, undoing his belt, his button and fly on his trousers. I pulled them down around his ankles, then pulling down the boxers, kissing his stomach.

I adored this man before me. So why was I treating him so badly?

It was all to do with the 456. With my guilt at knowing I had a hand in helping them get children in 1965. I was taking it out on Ianto, and I had absolutely no right too. As my lover, I should be holding him close, not trying to keep him at a distance.

For the next half hour or so, I was going to hold him so close and so tight, he'd have to beg me to let him go.

Once we were both naked, I laid Ianto back on the couch. I knelt beside him at first, kissing his lips. Then I kissed his neck. My hands roamed his body, resting on his stomach, then lower to his partially erect penis.

Ianto moaned in delight, as my hand moved to grasp him gently, bringing him fully erect. I smiled, I loved the way he looked when I was pleasuring him. Lost in the moment of the act. Eyes only for me. On me.

My lips when lower to kiss each nipple, taking them into my mouth. Nipping them gently, I toyed with the soft buds. I went lower still, kissing his taut stomach, licking round his belly button. Lower to capture his erection, while my hand still roamed his body.

"Jack," he whispered, "Please!"

Parting his legs, I knelt between them, placing his legs over my shoulders. Taking the tube of gel from the arm of the couch where I'd left it, I squeezed some onto my fingers. I entered one finger into Ianto, making him squirm with delight. After a few minutes I added a second then a third. Once he was well lubricated, I smiled down at him. Love and trust shone in those beautiful blue eyes.

I put more gel onto my hand and spread it over my own erection, then I slowly guided myself inside my lover. I moved slow, not wanting the act of lovemaking to end too fast. I wanted the experience to last more than just a few short minutes.

I loved this man, yet I'd never told him. Why was that? I knew he loved me. He didn't have to tell me. I could feel it. Taste it. See it. It was in everything he did for me. Every thing he did to me. Every part of his body told me how he felt every time I was close to him. Every time I touched him. Yet, I never once told him. He never once asked.

I quickened my pace, watching him as I moved to that spot, that place in his body that no one else had ever touched.

I closed my eyes and dreamed of happier times with this young man. Time when we couldn't get enough of each other. Sex was great, but I didn't want him just for his body. Some nights we were content to just hold each other through until morning.

I could feel Ianto was close, so I slowed my pace down and moved my body so I was touching his prostate with every stroke. He moaned with pleasure, saying my name. Tears leaked from the corners of his eyes. I knew they were tears of joy, pleasure, not pain or grief.

Then we both came together, in an explosion of heat and passion.

I whispered his name and he called out mine.

We lay in each others arms for a few minutes before I stood up, offering Ianto my hand.

"We better get cleaned up, Rhys will be back soon."

I wiped the tears away from Ianto's face with my thumbs, then kissed his lips.

We didn't speak after that, until Rhys returned.

We didn't need words.

THE END