It starts off as a joke. Or well, Santana would like to claim it off as a joke, but Brittany and her little sister have been nonsensically chatting about wizards and elves for the past week that she's allowed to be interested. Especially when she's walked in on Brittany twice, bawling her eyes out and mourning over Fred and something that sounds a lot like tubby. (It turns out to be Dobby, and Santana secretly lets out a breath of relief when it isn't Lord T that's kicked the can.)

It takes her exactly 8 hours to finish the first book, and she's ringing up Brittany as soon as the final words in the book come to a close.

"I'm definitely a Slytherin."

"Yeah, I know."

"Do you think we can still be together even if you're in, like, Gryffindor?"

"Santana, I'm not a Gryffindor."

"What? But you're like...good and stuff."

"I'm a Ravenclaw. Just like Luna."

"Who's Luna?"

"Go finish the books."

So what starts off as a joke, clearly turns into a full blown obsession. And soon enough, Santana has her daddy's credit card and etsy dot com pulled up on her browser. (She ends up ordering a Slytherin scarf for herself, and a full Ravenclaw clothing combo for Brittany. And okay, maybe she gets a tie, a sweater, and a wand too.)

It takes her 10 hours and 52 minutes to read the next book. She's so engrossed in the story that she forgets to sleep, go down for dinner, and wake up for Saturday family breakfast. Her brother, Arturo, seems worried momentarily, until he spots Chamber of Secrets emblazoned on the cover. He's laughing whole-heartedly when Santana puts on her coat and pushes through him without so much as a goodbye. She just grumbles.

She makes it to Brittany's house in record time, knocking on the door despite the fact that it's 7:33 AM. Brittany's mother greets her in her nightgown, yawning and ready to complain and send Santana home when she's silenced by a kiss to the cheek.

"I'm only here for two minutes, promise."

Susan doesn't have the energy to fight it. She simply gapes her response and knits her eyebrows together in confusion.

"I need the third book right now."

"Huh?" Brittany sits herself up on the bed lazily, rubbing her eyes. She can't exactly pin point Santana's thought process, especially when she's looking at her with serious eyes.

"Prisoner of Azkaban, B. I needz it now."

Comprehension finally fills Brittany up like a glass, and she has her trademark cheshire grin as she hands Santana a pile of books; the entire series. Santana mutters her thanks, placing a chaste kiss to Brittany's lips once.

Brittany doesn't get a chance to ask Santana if she wants to visit her Chamber of Secrets before Santana's out the door and on her way back home.

3, 4 and 5 go by in a breeze. Santana loses track of the days it takes her to finish because she's so absorbed. Not even Brittany's saucy taunting can prompt her out of her stupor.

Brittany eventually gives up, resorting to sliding her own hand down the expanse of her stomach until she's knuckle deep inside herself, pumping in and out. Santana side rages next to her about Harry's constant bitching and Jesus fuck, we get it! Your parents are dead!

"You're so inconsiderate, Santana!" Brittany huffs, sliding her sticky underwear up long legs. She scrunches her nose as Santana completely ignores her, choosing to gauge the words out on the page in front of her.

"Am not. Harry's just being annoying."

Blue eyes darken into a hard glare; Brittany definitely is not talking about Harry Potter. In fact, she kind of really hates him right now, too.

6 is kind of the real deal breaker for Santana. If she wasn't so stupidly in love with the books before, then six has totally renewed the premiss. She's down to the last chapters when god damn Severus Snape murders Albus Dumbledore.

The book goes flying from her hands and down to the edge of the bed. The brown of her eyes is clouded, though she doesn't realize what's going on until a startled Brittany is cradling her in her arms.

"Everyone thinks he's a bad person, but he's not," she whimpers.

"Oh, sweetheart. It's okay, it ends up okay."

(It doesn't, and Santana makes sure to loudmouth Brittany the rest of the hour.)

This time it's Brittany who's counting down the pages for Santana to finish. She's down to about 100 pages when Santana ushers the book close. Her eyebrows knit.

"Did this bitch seriously kill Harry Potter?"

Brittany grins.

"Babe, I swear to god if Harry's dea-" Brittany cuts her off with a kiss, silencing her soon to be rant Brittany knows is coming. (It took two fingers and a thumb on Santana's clit to get her to shut up about the lack of chemistry Harry and Ginny have. It took two fingers and a tongue to get her to shut up about how Luna and Harry would have been a much better match if Luna/Hermione wasn't going to happen.)

It takes another hour and a half for Santana to finish the entire book. Her eyes are slightly gazed and Brittany's waiting for the chatter that usually comes at the ending of her read. However, Santana just sits amongst Brittany's pillow with a deep frown. Her forehead crinkles with the exertion of her thinking; she can't decide on what she wants to comment on first.

"So, Harry lived."

"Yeah."

"And Voldemort's finally gone."

"Yeah."

"And so Harry came back from the dead, saw his dead parents, cleared Snape's name, and still got the chick?"

"Yeah."

"Magic is pretty fucking cool."

And, yeah, Brittany totally agrees.

"If we were at Hogwarts, where do you think we'd have have sex?"

Brittany's arm loosely untangles itself from Santana's neck, her fingers slide up the expanse of Santana's back, contemplating the thought. "Probably, like, everywhere."

"Well, yeah, but what about getting caught? Doesn't seem too private." She manages to work in around a soft moan, Brittany's lips hot on her neck.

"I don't know, San. Maybe I'd be a prefect."

"Yeah, maybe. Do you think it's possible to have sex on a broom stick?"

"Santana, shut up."

"I mean, if we hover close enough to the ground, I could totally just-"

"Remind me not to watch the movies with you. Especially if you're going to talk this muc-"

"You mean they made movies?"

A/N: So I posted this on Tumblr, and I figured I'd get organized and post this on here too.