Wedding Dress

She was a very beautiful bride at twenty two years old. Her hair was pulled back into loose curls. She had on a bright smile, white carnations scattered in her hair. Her smile was brighter than her mother's, but deep down, it wasn't hard to tell she was unhappy. She was settling. Her long ivory gown dragged elegantly across the floor, the cut in the front showing just enough to leave the rest to the imagination. She wasn't into the princess fairytale, she was a very elegant girl, her style was more tomboy than anything. To see her done up in ribbons and pearls was a new experience.

Her brown eyes gazed over at mine as she passed by. Her smile faded for all of a few seconds. She wasn't happy. Her brown eyes glared back at the floor ahead of her, being sure she didn't trip on her own gown. Her father was nowhere to be found, so walking her down the aisle instead was her older brother. How perfect.

Such a beautiful bride.

But she wasn't mine.

I watched helplessly as the only girl I ever loved signed away her life to someone else. He was a soldier. She met him when she was touring with the band. He was tall and handsome, regal looking in his uniform. He was the kind of man I would probably punch if I saw him in person. I never had the opportunity to meet him in person, she had just brought it up one day out of the blue, told me I had to come to her wedding…why…?

She stood so tall, so proud. The makeup covered the mark on her cheek almost flawlessly. She wasn't happy. She was hiding her tears behind a veil of darkness, listening idly as the preacher spoke. What was she going to say? I couldn't look at them. I couldn't see her happy with someone else; even if it was faked. Her happiness was my number one priority, especially after her brother told me I was no longer allowed near her.

I hurt her. I don't know how, but I hurt her. And I drove her into the arms of someone who was abusing her. Yet, here she stood, proud and tall, glistening like nothing had ever happened. God, she looked beautiful.

Do you, Katie Knight take Andrew Hartford to be your lawfully wedded husband, till death do you part?

My heart screamed at me. Say no! Say something! Stop them! You love her, James Diamond! Don't stand here while the girl you love signs away her heart in an abusive relationship! She might wake up dead one morning…don't let her do this! I couldn't stop myself. I immediately assumed the worst about this man; but I couldn't say anything. I tried to stand, but my feet made me fall. I tried to shout, but my voice was a mere whisper. I couldn't stop her.

I always come here late at night. It's a great place to get away and think. I could hear people talking, subjects varying from every frame of life. I could hear voices of people I knew, voices of people I cared about. I knew he could see me as soon as I walked in the door of the dimly lit bar. James Diamond knew more about me than any man in the world ever would. He watched me grow up. He watched me ruin my own life in a spiral from worse to worse.

He could see the dark tint to my eyes. No longer the bright brown they used to be. He could feel my pain every time I walked passed him. I ignored his presence, I sat at the bar towards the end, ordering my usual Vodka. This girl he was looking at, was no longer the Katie Knight he knew. No…she had to grow up and be strong. Now, now she was Katie Hartford. Why did I say yes? To make him mad? To make my mom happy? I couldn't even remember anymore.

I gingerly touched a hand to my face where I could feel the slight swelling where I'd been hit. Andrew suffered from PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, so he wasn't as sweet and kind as he used to be. I suppose the military did that to people. I stared at my reflection in my glass, ignoring the stares I got from people nearby. I imagine the blood on my lip was a dead give away that I had been in a fight. It didn't fit really well with the satin cocktail dress I was wearing.

A man sat beside me and smiled carelessly. He whispered in my ear softly, my smile was bright. "Thanks, I was wondering when you'd get here." I commented, laying my hand flat on the table. The man slipped a small package of white powder to me, taking the money in my palm. I grabbed the package and put it into my bag, ignoring the people around me, tapping my finger as I went back to drinking my Vodka.

I noticed the look I got from James. I really didn't care. I married Andrew a year ago, I know he could tell how horrible it had made me. I had already miscarried twice, it was quite obvious why. I never wanted this to happen to myself. I had big dreams, and Andrew took that away from me. He took everything away from me. Including the one person I loved more than life.

James, why aren't you stopping me? I thought you loved me…?

I got up to leave, walking passed him as if nothing happened. I dropped my hands to my sides, hoping he'd grab my hand and stop me. He just watched as I left. Just like every night before tonight. He didn't care.

I went back to Minnesota to avoid the memory of the girl I loved. I didn't realize that she had followed me. She was no longer with Andrew; he had been killed at war. I don't know why, but I felt this was a small blessing. Katie, she didn't change. Sure, she wasn't the Katie I knew anymore, but she was still the same woman I left behind. She sat across the street from my apartment, her eyes red, her lips cracked, her hair frizzed and her little body shaking. She hadn't eaten in days; I could tell by the way she was hunched over, spasms wracking through her little body.

I wasn't dumb. She was suffering through withdraws. Because it was her first run in with the law, they had given her a short sentence of going to rehab, and having to quit. She got through rehab just fine, but now the withdraws were starting to take their toll on her. I don't know if I ever recognized this girl before. I stared at her helplessly, not saying a word to her as I went my own way to work.

I don't know why I was surprised when she was still sitting there at ten when I got home. She huddled into the corner of the stoop of her apartment complex, biting down on her lip. She was trembling harder now, sweating, crying. I don't think I had ever seen Katie cry, not in the twenty-three years I had known her. For the first time in two years, I took a step towards her. Then two. "Katie."

"Go away. I don't need your help." She hissed, turning away from me and wrapping her arms around her chest. "I never needed your help."

"You may not need my help, but you do need my love." I knelt beside her, reaching out to take her hands. She shocked me when she pulled them away, my heart broke at the sight. "Your brother and mother disowned you, didn't they? That's why you found me. I know. Jo told me."

"Jo has no business telling you about my personal life! I can survive just fine without you guys! I don't need any of you!" Bitterness laced her voice.

I knew she was lying. I knew because she had waited for me every single day while I was at work. And when I came home, she went inside. Though her words still cut through my heart as if a knife. "Katie. That night in the bar," her brown eyes widened and looked straight at me. "Your wrists were bleeding. You wanted me to stop you. You did that on purpose. Everything you did that night, you did it on purpose. You wanted me to notice."

She reached an unsteady hand out to touch my hair, to move my bangs to the side. She was very quiet for a long time. "James Diamond…when I said yes, I wanted to say your name. I wanted to hear your name…why wasn't it your name?"

"Remember the night I was at your apartment covered in bruises and blood? After the night in the bar, your brother told me to never touch you again. He said you came home crying, saying I was worthless and didn't deserve to be in love. He told me that you didn't love me, and if I ever went near you again, he would make sure that I got arrested. After he decked me, I was pretty sure he was serious." I looked away, not wanting to see the regret in her eyes. I regretted not walking through fire for her, like she'd done for me. "But now I realize that love isn't a one way street. For it to work, both people need to make sacrifices. You…you gave up your life for me to realize I was making a big mistake."

"I want it back," She whispered.

"Your life?" I inquired, hearing her voice shaking with tears.

Her voice was quiet. She was vibrating with emotion, but I could barely hear her whispered confession."My heart."

"I already gave it away," I whispered back, touching my forehead to hers, wrapping my hand behind her neck possessively. "However, I can give you mine…if you promise to take care of it."

"If I say yes…will you save me from this disease that's controlling my life?" She leaned in to kiss me, her mouth a whisper away from mine.

"Yes," I murmured against her lips, kissing her again for the first time in years. I forgot what she tasted like, she smelled like honeysuckle. I loved that about her. "Yes, Katie Diamond. I'll make sure I do everything in my power to save you."

"You already have," her head burrowed against my neck. "You already saved me. You saved me that night in the bar. I was going to go home and kill him. But after seeing you, after seeing what kind of life I could have outside of prison, I didn't. You were always there, always watching; and for that…you saved me from myself."

"I love you, Katie."

"I love you, James."

Inspired slightly by the song "Wedding Dress" by Taeyang/Big Bang. I've always wanted to do one of these, so I did. It switches POV three times. James/Katie/James

For the people who were reading "Step Two", I'm working on updating it ASAP. I've had four different ideas for chapters, and I'm trying to decide which one to go with. Hold tight and be patient, I'll get it up shortly.