Jaejoong sat in the dressing room hugging his knees. If anyone had come in they would probably accuse him of being depressed. That was only about half right he was more in a thought coma.
Jaejoong kept thinking about the way he had been acting recently. He had tried to ignore it but it had been three months since it started. He knew that if he carried on any further he would risk breaking the band up. The thought of losing any of his fellow members brought tears to his eyes.
The problem was that Jaejoong had been "noticing" Changmin. He found he could tell the way Changmin felt by the smile he used. He noticed that he kept tension in his shoulders and how his butt looked in his favorite jeans. Jaejoong also caught himself looking at Changmin when they changed for performances.
He felt like he was falling for Changmin and it hurt him deeply. He knew he would never be able to confess his love. Even though confessing would cause trouble the thought of having unrequited love hurt just as much.
Jaejoong never thought that he'd turn out gay. Growing up he had loved women but when he joined Dong Bang Shin Ki he felt his lust start to disappear. He didn't feel the need to see women anymore. He assumed he had just gotten through puberty finally. There were signs of course, like looking at men's butts or thinking a man was god looking but he brushed them off.
As Jaejoong was thinking about all of this Yunho entered the room and asked, "What's up? You look like crap."
"No I'm fine," Jaejoong said shaking his head and smiling. "I just lost something and was trying to figure out where it was."
"What was it? Maybe I've seen it."
"No it's not important. Thanks anyway."
Jaejoong flashed Yunho a smile and started for the door. When he opened the door Changmin was on the other side. Jaejoong had a shocked look on his face but quickly recovered. He bowed to Changmin as he entered than quickly retreated.
"What's with Jaejoong?" Changmin asked Yunho sitting down.
"He said he lost something, beyond that I don't know," he replied.
Changmin sorted through his stuff for the performance and couldn't help but wonder about Jaejoong. Usually they're very close but lately Jaejoong's been avoiding him. Changmin was sad at the thought of not spending time with him and wondered what he had done wrong. He was starting to get fed up with trying to figure out what he did. He would have given up if it hadn't been for the fact that Jaejoong was so important to him.
As he was looking through his stuff he decided he was going to confront Jaejoong after tonight's performance. He just wanted to be able to hang out with him again. He saw no reason to be apart and didn't want to worry over this anymore.
Now that it was decided what he was going to do he decided to take a small nap before they had to go on stage. He went into a corner and curled up putting his jacket beneath his head as a pillow of sorts. Before he closed his eyes he wished to have another dream.