Fullmetal Alchemist Deleted Scene

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. This is only my second fanfiction so please rate and review! Oh, and one other thing the whole 'FINE' acronym thing is from a movie, which again I don't own, sadly, called The Italian Job. So if everyone is clear with the program, enjoy!

The two boys walked in silence as they left the Tucker mansion. Edward had too much on his mind to concern himself with talking and Alphonse sensed this. But when the silence became a little too uncomfortable for Al he cleared his throat and asked a question that had been bothering him since they left.

"Uhh...Brother? Where are we gonna stay? We don't have a lot of money..."

Ed, hearing the concern in his brothers voice, put on his goofiest grin.

"Not to worry, Al. I'm sure there's a hotel or something near here...We're gonna need it to be close anyway..." He said more serious.

"W-what? Why? Why does it need to be close?" squeaked Alphonse.

"I'll tell you later, after we find a place." said Edward dismissively.

Al was a little uneasy about whatever his brother was planning but he didn't say anything, trudging beside Edward in the same uncomfortable silence of before. After about thirty minutes of walking the two of them stumbled across a cheap looking hotel.

"Here looks as good a place as any." said Edward a little too cheerfully, as they entered the office.

"Are you sure about this, Brother?" asked Alphonse eyeing the dingy paint on the walls.

"Course! It'll be fine!"

Alphonse somehow disagreed with Ed but didn't voice it, and after they had been checked in, followed him to their room. It was run down as the rest of the building but the beds were decent, so Al couldn't really complain, not that it would have mattered to him anyway, he wouldn't be able to feel it. Edward immediately flopped on bed, sprawled out. Alphonse chuckled to himself as he laid the suitcase on the floor by the bed and seated himself.

"So? Are you going to tell me this plan you've been hatching since we left Mr. Tucker and Nina?" asked Al.

Ed sighed and sat up.

"I'll tell you after I get back from getting us something to eat."

"Alright...But let me go, Ed. You're tired, you had just woken up when we had to leave, you could use the rest."

"Al you don't have to worry, you know." laughed Ed.

"Someone's got to, seeing as how you won't." said Al standing up and snatching the wallet out of Ed's pocket. "And besides all you'll buy is junk food and ramen noodles." Al giggled as he ran for the door.

"HEY! What the-?" Ed began as Al ripped their money bag out of his pant's pocket. "And I like noodles!" Ed shouted at Alphonse's disappearing figure.

Edward sighed again and wondered to himself why he didn't fight Al to go the market himself. He laid down but immediately sat back up. The room was cold and dark now that Al had left. He got up and left the room and took the steps down to the office two at a time. He exited the building and walked to the playground that was around the corner. He sat on a swing and hugged his arms around his stomach. He could still see the woman's cold dead eyes that reminded him so much of the product of his failed human transmutation. Edward suddenly felt sick as a knot twisted in his stomach. He wrapped his arms tighter around himself trying to swallow the sick feeling. He couldn't afford to be weak; he inwardly kicked himself and hung his head in shame. The sound of booted feet caused Ed to look up. It was Roy. Edward scowled and looked away. This didn't seem to disturb Roy any as he leaned against the swing set and casually lit a cigarette. Exhaling a cloud of smoke he asked.

"What are you doing out here?"

"The Brigadier General threw us out of the mansion." Ed answered simply.

"Where are you staying?"

Ed pointed to the rundown hotel. Roy made a noncommittal noise and took another drag off his cigarette.

"So how you holding up?"

"I'm fine!" snapped Ed.

"About as fine as you were in that alley, right?"

"Shut up!"

Roy's eyes narrowed.

"Careful how you address your superiors, Fullmetal." he said, his voice laced with anger. There was a pause and Roy's voice took on a gentler tone. "That was a pretty rough thing to have seen right out the chute. She was pretty messed up; it was a lot of blood."

"It wasn't the blood that bothered me, I've seen more blood than that come from my own limbs." said Ed in a quiet barely audible voice. "It was the eyes..." Ed shivered involuntarily. "They reminded me of...Never mind..."

Roy nodded. He didn't need to ask what it reminded the boy of, he already knew. Roy wanted to say something to comfort the child, but didn't know the words that would help. He opened his mouth to speak but Edward suddenly said.

"I'll be fine though, I just need to get used to this sort of thing."

The words were forced and said without conviction; Roy snorted,

"Get used to this sort of thing?"

"I'm a State Alchemist and a military soldier, this isn't going to be the last time I see something like this so I'd better just desensitize myself."

"I wouldn't advise desensitizing yourself, it's not healthy. And you don't have to be a State Alchemist. No one forced you to join and there's no one that will force you to stay. You can turn in your watch at anytime, if that's what you want." said Roy somewhat kindly.

"No, I can't!" shouted Ed. "I have to get Al's body back, and to do that I need to be a State Alchemist, and State Alchemist's see that sort of thing! That was the whole point of it all! To get Al's body back, to give back what I took from him!

B-because I don't even have the right to apologize to him and ask for forgiveness if I haven't found a way to fix it!"
Tears stung at Edward's eyes and he hung his head again, refusing to look at Roy, wishing he could recall everything he had just said. Roy didn't need to know any of that. Taking a deep, steadying breath Ed said.

"It'll be better if I just become accustomed to it...And you're a fine one to talk of not desensitizing yourself, you don't show any emotion, and I'm not sure you have any! So don't worry about me, I'll be fine!"

"Do you know what 'Fine' stands for?" asked Roy.

"No..."

"Freaked out, insecure, neurotic, and emotional." Said Roy smiling as Edward scowled again. "So tell me, are you still feeling fine? Because I'll believe you if you say yes."

Roy dropped the cigarette and crushed it beneath his foot.

"I'm good, thanks!" spat Ed as he got up from the swing and began to stomp off. Roy caught him by the shoulder and restrained him gently.

"They say soldiers are meant to be lead by their emotions, and maybe that's true...But just because we aren't meant to be lead by them, that doesn't mean we don't have them, Ed." said Roy, giving Edward a comforting pat on the shoulder.

Edward looked at his feet, now ashamed of what he had said to the Colonel, and he contemplated saying he was sorry when a military vehicle pulled up.

"I have to go now."the Colonel said. "You should head back, your brother will start to worry if you don't."

"Al's not there, he's buying something to eat."

"Still, it'll still be better to wait for him there." said Roy as he let his hand drop from the boy's shoulder and stepping up to the car. "Oh, and I expect to see you at eight'o'clock sharp tomorrow morning, is that understood, Fullmetal?"

"Yes sir."

"Good."

Edward watched the car disappear before turning to returning to the manor. Roys still echoed in his ears, 'But just because we aren't meant to be lead by emotion, that doesn't mean we don't have them.'

"Was that his way of saying it bothers him too?" Ed asked himself. He shrugged, still feeling slightly bad for having said the Colonel was devoid of feelings when Roy was trying to comfort him. He reached the hotel and walked in.

Annnnnnnd...I just realized that at the point in the story that this fic takes place, Ed has yet to be given his symbolic name, Fullmetal. But here Roy is calling him that like it's normal. Sorry about that, I really didn't think about that, like I should have...(Hangs head in shame) Please let me know if you think I should change that...