Author's note: Yet another outtake from Learning to Breathe, this one set in Chicago…exact date isn't relevant to the plot. Just a crazy little one-shot for your enjoyment
Summary: When you find yourself in charge of two insane terrorist teams, you find yourself letting certain things slide, and for Zartan, the hair dye was the first thing forgotten…until Regan and Kris decide to do something about it!
Disclaimer: Andi/Atlantis, Bryan/Chaos, Kristen/Eventide, and Corona are all mine. Everyone else either belongs to L1701E, Marvel, or Hasbro.
Zartan's New Do
"I'm telling you, Kris, we need to do something about this." Regan said, earning her friend's attention.
"About what? Was Virus trying to snoop through your underwear drawer again?
"Not that!" The Italian said. "I'm talking about the boss's hair."
"You mean he's not making a new fashion statement?" Corona raised an eyebrow as she walked into the kitchen. "How long has he been putting off dying it. Those roots have got to be two inches long…"
"At least." Kristen said. "Let's see, we first noticed that his natural hair color was black back during that stint in Albany, so…four months? Maybe five."
"Sounds right." Regan nodded. "Maybe add a few weeks on to that. We only had time to notice during Albany, so it probably started before then."
"I guess he just never found time, and forgot." Corona shrugged. "I don't see how this is our problem."
"it's an eyesore!" Kristen exclaimed. "And I for one am not putting up with it! If he won't do anything about it himself, then it's up to us!"
"Dear God, what are you trying to drag us into?" Corona groaned.
"No, really, it's simple!" Kris said. "We slip a Benadryl® in his food, and then while he's in a drug-induced cat-nap, we cut off his hair!"
"You just want to play hairdresser again, and none of the boys will let you." Regan frowned.
"Besides, who's to say allergy medicine will work?" Corona shrugged.
"You're right." Kris said. "Better use chloroform instead."
"I think she's gone off the deep end." The brunette energy-wielder shot the blond across the room a worried look.
"She's been in the deep end for quite some time, Rona." The telepath shrugged.
"Or…" Kris looked thoughtfully in her teammates' directions.
"Oh no." Regan shook her head. "No, no, no. It will never work!"
"Sure it will! He's got to take that telepathy blocker off at some time, probably when he goes to sleep."
"No."
"Hey, you were the one who brought up the idea!"
"Yes, but I don't think it's worth being grounded and stuck in extra training sessions over."
"I do. Count me in." Both of them whirled to look at Corona.
"Rona, I think you've gone and lost your sensibilities." Regan shook her head.
"Join us on the dark side!" Kristen chirped. "We have cookies."
"Not if you're cooking, we don't." The blonde pointed out, causing her shorter companion to pout.
"My cooking isn't that bad!"
"So long as it comes out of a can or a box."
"Tell you what, join us and we'll get either Andi or Bryan to make the cookies." Corona put in. It was a well-known fact that if you wanted something baked (or cooked, in general), those two were the ones to hit up for the job.
The telepath thought about that for a whole thirty seconds before letting out a resigned sigh. "Fine, I'll help, but I'm not going to be the one cutting off his hair!"
"Leave that to me." Kris smirked. "He won't even know what hit him!"
When he first woke up at dark-thirty the next morning, Zartan didn't suspect anything was out of the ordinary. He'd actually gone through the early-morning training sessions and was trying to get the group of hormone-crazed mutant teenagers known as Shadowatch to settle down over breakfast before someone pointed it out to him.
"So, when did you do that?" Neal "Thunderbird" Sharra gestured somewhere in the direction of his head, trying to talk through a mouthful of corn flakes.
"What are you talking about?" He shot the boy a confused look.
"I have to admit, I thought you were just gonna re-dye it." Burn-Out shook his head. "But this works to…"
Left field? Your outfielder's here. "All this over my hair?" He blinked. "And what do you mean 'this works too'? I didn't do anything to it!"
"Well someone obviously did." Andi smirked. "Did you even look in the mirror this morning? I mean, how could you not notice that much hair just disappearing?"
Well something had felt a little odd this morning…but double checking his reflection was the last thing on his mind. Seriously, who had time for that anymore? Especially when some members of the squad tended to "accidentally" forget to set their alarms in hopes of getting out of early-morning training sessions.
"You can use my mirror if you want." Regan said, a positively serene (and proud) smile on her face as she handed a small compact mirror in his direction. Kristen had a similar smug/excited expression. Hmm… He might have just found his culprits.
But first things first. What the hell did they do last night?
He begrudgingly took the offered mirror, and took a good hard look at the damage. At least six inches of hair was now whacked off, leaving about two inches of (graying) black hair with tips of maroon. Lovely. Just lovely.
"Girls," He looked over at Kristen and Regan, who both tried to look as innocent as possible, "you wouldn't happen to know anything about this, would you?"
"Why would you think that, boss?" Kris asked sweetly. He frowned.
"Nice try, but you're not fooling me." He looked over the two of them.
"Well if you're punishing us, you have to get Rona too." Regan said. "She helped find the scissors."
"Snitch." The Latina girl glared at the telepath.
"Enough!" He shouted, gaining the attention of everyone in the room. "All three of you have now earned the privilege of being the base's new clean-up crew!"
"No problem." Kris waved. "We'll be done in a flash!"
"The entire base." He said. "The living quarters, the shop, the garage—all of it! For the next week. And that's on top of the new set of training sessions you just earned yourselves."
"Told you it wasn't worth training sessions." Regan grumbled.
"It was totally worth it." Kristen said. "Trust me. We did the world a favor here!"