Kamui woke up in the midst of the commotion outside his bedroom. He found himself lying still on the soft covers, not willing to get up. Somehow, his body had gotten heavier. Maybe it is the fault of the food he ate. Despite having an overactive digestive system, he is gaining weigh recently. His gaze fell on the clock. Both hands pointed at seven, which means it was seven thirty-five by then. He felt strange as Abuto would normally wake him by saying something about a certain stupid captain being such a lazy ass at the other side of the bedroom door. After that, he will bug him with a schedule and a list of tasks for the admiral of the Harusame.
He garbed himself in his usual uniform, thinking about the morning and its unusual start. Unlocking the doors with his left hand, he grabbed his umbrella with the other. He then sheathed the weapon in its case.
Two soldiers were the source of the noise. "Good morning sir," they said, bowing politely to the admiral once they saw him coming. However, the two of them were sweating in the presence of Kamui. Thanks to his notorious habit of killing whatever that bothers him—including underlings—they were extremely terrified of him.
One of the soldiers then knocked the other with the back of his hand, gesturing his partner to do something. Kamui noticed the unusual behavior of his subordinates. "Ara, ara, I don't really have any time left for you two. If you don't hurry up, I'll kill cha." With a threatening grin plastered on, Kamui spoke without hiding his intention to slash the two.
"It's just that Abuto-sama needs you in the elders' ship," one began.
"He is dealing with an important guest today, so he would join you later," the other added.
"Hmm.. that's weird." Kamui was wallowed in his thoughts when the soldiers postponed themselves, running away from the braided young man. The man-in-question, on the other hand, had noticed this.
"Hey, wait!" he called them back after they were a few steps away from their previous position.
Abandoning their mission of running away, the soldiers turned back to face the admiral. "Do you know where Abuto is?" Kamui asked with a smile.
"Abuto-sama is at the dining hall sir," they answered.
Kamui kept wondering on what that Nintendo fan is doing in the dining hall. He reached his destination and pushed open the grand doors. The room was clean and brightly lit as usual.
The walls were decorated by masterpiece artworks and a painting of rice that replaced Admiral Abo's self-portrait. And then there was Abuto who was sitting on a chair with an impatient look on his face. He kept looking at the wall clock. Subconsciously, he tapped the table with his fingers as a sign of impatience. When he heard someone entering the room, Abuto mood's lightened a bit—only to be disappointed when he saw his captain.
"Oi, oi, what's up with the smug face, Taicho?"
Kamui smiled at him in reply and took a step forward."What are you doing h—"
Before he can even finish, the door slammed wide open. Kamui dodged it to avoid hitting him.
"Sorry I'm late!" A girl with messy violet hair entered the room. She carried an umbrella like an average Yato but her skin texture is slightly darker than the normal one.
"Man, I got busted because of your tardiness, missy," Abuto pointed out.
Kamui observed the girl at the corner of his eye. He put on a cheerful face and whistled.
"Whooo! Your cheesy flirting abilities managed to hook a girl! What's this, an offline meeting? Both of you are Sega fans?"
"I'm a Nintendo fan, not Sega's," he replied with a sigh. No matter how many times he protested about it, Kamui tended to forget that fact.
"I'm a Sonic fan, not Sega's," the girl claimed.
"Nobody is asking you about it," Abuto sighed and prayed his captain to leave soon.
As if answering his prayers, Kamui walked away. "Sorry to butt in your date," he apologized."I'll give you three minutes. So, better finish your business as soon as possible and rejoin me in the elder's ship."
After Kamui left, Abuto picked a chair he just sat. On the other hand, the girl looked around her surroundings and before sitting down at the opposite direction, the painting of rice caught her attention.
"Eh? What happened to that baldy admiral's portrait?"
"Admiral Abo was thrown out by the elders. My commander is the current admiral now so he put that up there."
"That portrait is such an eyesore. Glad to see it removed."
"You dare to claim to own the title of 'Know-It-All' yet you weren't even paying attention to the Harusame's events such as stuff like the admiral had changed." Abuto said mockingly.
"Really, but all I heard is that a Yato from the seventh squad had lost his left hand in a fight with The Hyakka, Yoshiwara's guards. The charges are sleeping with the courtesans without you know who that might be, Sega fan?" she shot back with an innocent tone.
Abuto rolled his eyes. 'Yeah, yeah thank you so much for the fight with Housen, Admiral Nincompoop. To stop it, I sacrificed my hand to be I'm being teased by a brat.'
He held back his anger and ignored the question. He took a bulging envelope out from his pocket and threw it to the girl.
The girl caught it with both hands. "What's this job yer givin' me this time, Sega fan?" she asked while twisting her messy locks in a playful way.
"The details are written in there, your payment too. Are you sure you can get your task done?" Abuto pointed to the envelope with an index finger.
"Piece of cake. I will solve all yer problems." She opened the envelope and began counting the fresh crisp notes. She rubbed her fingers together. "By the way, did ya know that my catchphrase is 'Customers lacking greenies should be ignored, those with enough cash shall be aided'? Ya know that, Sega fan?"
"BRAT, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY?! ARE YOU SAYING THE MONEY ISN'T ENOUGH? AND DROP THE SEGA FAN ALDREADY! I'M GETTING WAY PISSED!" Abuto lost control of his temper. The throb on his forehead was clearly visible, and his flushed face showed his emotions clearly. He left the room and stomped towards the elder's fleet to release his anger.
'Now I have to deal with the other idiot. This is definitely my worst day ever.'
When he crossed the bridges that happened to link the two ships, he observed the sight of space around him. Enveloped by the darkness, he felt himself in a somber mood. Reaching the entrance of the elder's ship, Abuto thought, "At least I get a chance to be in a flashy ship." Self-sympathizing often helps his day pass, considering the fact that he has such a troublesome captain.
And as soon as Abuto had entered the premises, he then saw an elder sitting at a high spot while. Kamui stood in the center of the room.
"Kamui, this is an order by us elders, you have no right to offend it. So keep away from the drug selling business, the twelfth squad will take care of t—"
Suddenly, a brawny guard opened the metallic door from outside to let Abuto in. The elders seemed displeased to be interrupted and gestured the guard to close the door. However, Abuto still managed to slip through the door before it was shut completely.
"I guess it is time to end the meeting," an elder suggested while the others assented by nodding. They sent their guards to escort the admiral and his partner back to the Harusame.
Abuto did not utter anything on the journey back, not until the guards were gone. "Err..Taicho, I thought you have something to say."
"Not really. In fact, I'm glad you budged in or else I will have to hear those old geezers rantingthe same topic forever."
"Don't tell me that you're using me to irate the elders so that the meeting will stop?"
"Not exactly. I don't wanna bother your love affair with that girl," Kamui replied teasingly.
"She's not my girl but someone working for m—"
Before Abuto finished his sentence, Kamui cut in.
"Working? So you are not exactly a moron that didn't notice 'that' after all. But why are you using a girl to investigate the matter?" A sly look appeared on his face.
"I'm not that stupid. I get 2/5 of the questions right when taking an IQ test," Abuto said. "And,yeah, the elders are acting suspiciously lately. Besides that, our main computer was hacked lastnight. It's most likely to be the work of a spy."
"Che. Getting 2/5 of the questions correct is way below average. I can get half of the questions correct." The Yatos stopped their tracks when they heard a familiar sound. Turning their heads, they saw the owner of the voice—the girl Abuto hired.
"Furin, what're you doing here?" Abuto asked. He stared in awe when Furin moved away andpointed to the three of his men who were lying on the cold, hard floor. All of them have their faces swollen, not to mention the bruises on their limbs. Kamui opened his shut eyes and was a bit surprised at the scene before him.
"It's hard to find the way around here. So, I asked yer men for the direction. They all asked me what I am doing here instead of answering. Worse they call me little girl. That's why I hit them a little," she reasoned out, pouting.
"A little? You totally knocked them out," Abuto mumbled.
Furin made an innocent face. "Aw..it's just only a soft punch, Abuto-chan."
"Drop the cute and innocent act already. It sends shivers down my spine!" Abuto retorted. "Oi Taicho, why can you act so norma—"
"Hitting is nothing. Even my inaptitude sister did more than that. She will insert chopsticks in my old man's a**hole whenever she failed to have another bowl of rice during mealtimes. That's her only talent that impresses me," said Kamui, shamelessly revealing a dark secret of their family.
"I also did that to my daddy. But instead of a chopstick ti stuck his an*s, I used frozen Chuuberts I'm saving for dessert," Furin lied though her teeth by putting on the same innocent face again.
"That's nothing. I used a chair." Kamui was willing to exaggerate more to win the battle. "Seeing
my old man suffer from the pain sure brings intense pleasure."
Abuto, on the other hand, can only watch in return. He sighed heavily while thinking, 'I guess I'm stuck with a bunch of maniacs.'
"Itadakimasu!"
The two 'maniacs' chomped on their food. On the table, there were all kinds of delicacies that were so hard to resist, even for Abuto.
"Wait a minute, why the hell are we having the meeting in the dining hall? The crew can easily overhear us!" Abuto drooled over the food but insisted on changing the meeting place.
"tbwelivehwe mug a dusguf thus huhdcoft. Nu wiyayr pusn a fruumeol" (Let us finish the dessert first. Can't believe how much a dish of this had cost. No way I'm passin' a free meal.) Furin said with her mouth full. Food was spraying out of it.
'You just admitted that you're here for the free food,' Abuto thought secretly as he sees no point on arguing with her.
Within a blink of an eye, all the food had disappeared down Kamui's and Furin's throat. "Ah…that was satisfying. Now to our main issue: How to eat and talk at the same time!" Furin announced.
"That's not our problem here," Abuto reminded.
"Yeah, it isn't. Look, my clothes are dirty due to the food that was sprayed out when I'm talking," Furin complained.
"Well, I got the same problem too. Then let's change the subject into…which detergent can effectively wash food stains off clothes?" Kamui went on with the flow.
"Detergent, my ass! Just how desperate are you that you even wanted to clean those smudges? Aren't we discussing about the undercover?" Abuto directed them into the aim of the meeting.
"Okay, calm down. Let's get serious." Furin then stated out the problems and told them her deductions. "The main computer of this ship was hacked yesterday. There are two possibilities that caused this chaos. My first deduction is that a group of Jouishishi is planning to regain balance of the corrupted Bakufu by using the information of the computer as a threat. I believe the government is secretly supporting the Harusame. Even the slightest information can prove useful. But I don't think their current technology can successfully break into the computer's security walls. Second possibility is that an unknown force has its interest on taking down the Harusame. Thus, they need the ship and its crew data. Lastly—"
"Those old geezers are fishy too. They may lose their trust on me and plan to kill me off once they have a chance. Their problem is that I got more than half of the Harusame's crew supporting me. They can't do anything about it, so they sent some idiot to observe me. Hacking into the computer and successfully manipulating the CCTV made his job easier," Kamui said, his habit of cutting in once again being activated.
"Do you have any suspects?" Abuto asked.
"So far, I only have one suspect: Takasug iShinsuke, the leader of the Kiheitai. He's a cunning fella that will not hesitate to betray anyone in order to reach his goalof destroying the world. He might be receiving orders from the elders to keep an eye on ya. But I don't think this is highly possible since I have no record of him meeting with the elders nor having contact with them." Furin took out a huge stack of documents. "All of them are contact records of the Kiheitai and Takasugi Shinsuke. I managed to read a whole heap of them."
"Where the hell did you take that pile of papers from? How can you read them all in such a short time?" Abuto's tone was a mixture of disbelief and astonishment.
She then took the advantage to boast. "Who do ya think I am? I'm the Know-It-All, Furin-sama."
"But this is really unbelievable to accomplish that. Even I myself sign in defeat." Kamui clapped his hands in approval.
"Haha, I knew that. My hobby of reading records really paid off. I just happened to come across the Kiheitai's contact records a few days ago," Furin confessed.
"Wow, that's cool. I think I should start reading recipes from now on. I think I'll be a successful chef," remarked Kamui with an enlightened look plastered on his face.
"Oi, commander! That would make her a sicko. And what happened to your ambition of mimicking Luffy?"
"That lanky and I just happened to share the same ambition of being the pirate king. Plus I hate his hairstyle," Kamui noted.
"Yeah, the hair is too normal. I hate how his straw hat to cover it .Main characters need an afro, sea urchin-looking, rainbow-colored hair or maybe one that looks like a joystick as a trademark. Oh, and do you know my wish is to taste a rainbow-colored sea urchin? Thinking about Luffy's new hair makes me water my mouth. I bet they taste salty," Furin suggested while wiping the saliva off her chin.
"No, I bet they taste sour." Kamui joined in and so did Abuto. (Even though he had another thought in mind.) "I bet Oda-sensei will maintain Luffy's hairstyle."
'I bet the two maniacs have lost their mind.'
To stop the pointless talk from dragging on, Abuto suddenly asked, "Furin, what are youplanning next? I believe you're hiding some tricks up your sleeve for catching the spy. Is there anything we may assist you with?"
"Oh, that? You can help by taking me in as a crew of the Harusame," Furin suggested.
"So you plan to investigate through the identity of a ship crew." Kamui's questioning tone hinted craftiness. Obliviously, he was scheming something in his shitty brain.
"Spill the beans. Stop tugging on." Furin words broke the tense atmosphere Kamui built.
"Ara, ara, don't be so impatient. If you wanna know what's gonna happen, remember to read the next chapter. But good news, the first five reviewers will get to know the upcoming plots."
"Oi, who gave you the permission of ending this chapter?"
"Shut up Sega fan, we're just following the script," Kamui and Furin said in unison. Abuto's advices were ignored by his commander and employee.
Thus, this chapter was ended in an advertisement-ish fashion.
Next chapter: Welcoming Parties Can't Lack Liquor
Thanks to the following: Mozilla Firefox, Fanfiction Site, Microsoft Word and of course, kurasuchi-san (for beta-ing this fic).
"There's even a footage and one of those thank-you-sponsors session?" said Abuto who somehow found a way back to the fic.