A Small Price
Disclaimer:- Don't own them just borrowing!
Episode:- None
Pairing:- Jean /James
Rating:- M
Achieve:- http(:/) . /group/rebeccafrontlewisffarchive/
Summary:- She didn't think so because for that one night with him, for that one experience that proved all her fantasies of him had been justified and would feed many more fantasies to come eternal damnation was a small price to pay.
Author's Note:- This is the first of 3 completely UNRELATED stories that all happen to begin with the same opening two lines, I'll publish the other two over the next week but they are not connected they just happen to start the same because the line came into my head and I could think of three ways to deal with it and couldn't pick which one I liked best! All three stories are rated M for sexual content and language so if that's not your thing stop now you've been warned. Otherwise enjoy and reviews would be lovely!
He was drunk. If there was a grand cosmic court that took account of your misdemeanours in life and asked you to explain them that would be his defence. She was not so in the same situation she was pretty sure she was damned. She'd been the designated driver something they all took their turn at when they spent the evening together and something she actually enjoyed. The banter between Robbie and James throughout dinner was a constant source of amusement for her and the fact that the more Robbie and Laura had to drink the less guarded they were about how they clearly felt about each other kept her amused at the after dinner drinks. That night though she'd sensed something in the air, something that in retrospect she knew should have warned her that there was danger ahead. At least she'd told herself afterward she hadn't seen it coming; never in a million years would she have predicted what was to come. That may not be much of a defence against the charge that she let it happen but at the very least she hoped it might explain why her normal common sense had deserted her when it did.
"We're going to get a taxi Ma'am do you think you can get the boy genius home and through the front door? I don't think he'll be able to get the key in the lock without help the state he's in!" That should have been the point when the first alarm bell went off in her head. She'd long ago given up pretending to herself that her obvious soft spot for James Hathaway was purely professional. She'd long ago accepted that she was dangerously attracted to him but then she'd also convinced herself that the attraction was completely one sided so why should she be alarmed at the idea of returning the slightly inebriated object of her most secret desires safely home.
"I'm not drunk certainly not as drunk as you two." The endlessly cute way he insisted and how he whispered in her ear that a taxi wasn't all Robbie and Laura would be sharing that night had made her heart race and her stomach flip just a little should have been the cue for alarm bell number 2. Unfortunately though it wasn't unusual for her to feel that way when he was so close especially since she'd left her husband and given herself permission to indulge more often in the way she felt about the young man now pulling her to her feet.
"James I'm the one whose sober I can stand up on my own, come on let's get you home you need to get to bed." The way he'd held her gaze a little longer than was necessary and how he seemed reluctant to release her hand was when she did hear the first distant chiming of a bell but if questioned, even now, she'd defend the fact she dismissed it as wishful thinking.
"You know your husband?" They'd been almost at his place before he spoke again and when he did the unusual nature of his statement had caught her off guard.
"My soon to be ex-husband? Yes sadly I do know him." For a second as she pulled up outside his home and walked to his side of the car she'd believed he'd fallen asleep. As it was she'd have been better off if he had but when they got through the door of his small flat it was clear that all he'd been doing was collecting his thoughts.
"He was an idiot. Your husband I mean. You're a beautiful woman, your smart, you're great at your job, and you are damn sexy. If I'd been him I'd never have let you go. Just saying I think he's an idiot." He'd been standing too close again when he said it and she'd defend her actions or lack of action by citing the way the smell of him seemed to muddle her brain as mitigation.
"James I think you need to go to bed you're going to be suffering in the morning and you are not going to remember having said any of that which is probably just as well." She'd left him standing in the hallway glancing from room to room in search of the bedroom and it was at the exact moment that she found it that the real trouble started.
She turned to see where he was just as his hands reached for her hips pulling her toward him his lips crashing into hers. Shock; that was her first defence for the fact she didn't push him away. When that passed though and she willingly relented to his determination to deepen the kiss she'd known exactly what she was doing and she didn't care. She'd truly believed that was as far as it would go, that he'd suddenly come to his senses and stop realising that it was her he was kissing and remembering that he didn't look at her that way. She'd allowed the kiss to continue because with all her heart she'd wanted to store away that moment in the knowledge it would never happen when he was sober.
At the moment that one of his hands had tangled in her hair tipping her head back to give him access to her neck she'd known they were hurtling toward the point of no return and she should stop but the way he was devouring her, pushing her into the bedroom as he did made it impossible.
"I want you so much." His words had been muffled by the way he'd buried his head in the swell of her cleavage but they'd had exactly the effect she was sure he knew they would. Right in that second she didn't need to be loved or cherished or even feel like what they were doing was real or could last. In that second all she wanted was to be desired, lusted after, to make someone blind to the rights and wrongs of what they were doing because they needed her so much. That was why she knew she no defence could save her from the eternal damnation she would one day face.
As he undressed her ad she him, as he touched her, kissed her, set her body alight with desire for him everything else meant nothing. Their working relationship, the fact he was so much younger, the fact that love or a future or even how they would deal with this afterward were irrelevant. She wanted him and she wasn't about to be deprived of what he was clearly more than willing to give her because of what tomorrow night bring.
The moan that echoed around the room as she felt his breath stroke her clit before he began lapping hungrily at it sounded alien to her. She has so missed being the object of someone else's desire; missed feeling like her pleasure was someone's only aim. When her fingers grabbed at the sheets on either side of her and he increased the pace of his lips on her core and added two fingers to the sensation she'd gladly given up to him. She'd screamed his name as the first orgasm she hadn't had to provide for herself in too long washed over her. She'd taken immediate control when he kissed her telling her how beautiful she was when she came. She'd pinned him to the bed, impaled herself on him and revelled in a moment of fullness as he groaned loudly at the sensation.
"God you feel good Jean, so wet, so tight," She'd felt herself confidence swell at his words and the way he was still finding it impossible to keep his hands still on her body as he kneaded her breasts in time with her rhythmic thrusts. At that second she wanted to feel him cum inside her more than she could ever remember wanting to feel anyone else give up before. As he moved with her a string of husky compliments and lust filled instructions absorbing into her consciousness in a way she knew she'd never forget until the day she died her desperation reached fever pitch.
"Let go James, let me feel it when you cum inside me, I need to feel what I can do to you." She no longer had any control over the words falling from her lips ad she didn't care, she was already being drowned in a tidal wave of core shattering pleasure and the fact that in doing so she pulled him with her for the ride was all she could focus on.
"Now that is a way to end the evening." The mischievous twinkle in his eyes and the way he pulled her into his arms kissing her with a sleepy pleasure was the reason she didn't immediately leave. It was the reason she'd waited until he fell asleep to gather up her clothing dressing quickly and slipping out the door.
As she pulled into her driveway ten minutes later the feeling of contented exhaustion, the way her nerves still tingled in a way they hadn't in so long was yet another reason she knew she was without defence for what she'd done, what they'd done. He may not even remember in the morning what had happened but a tiny part of her hoped he would, want to be memorable, to be good enough to be remembered in spite of the alcohol he'd consumed. Walking into the empty house and heading for bed without even turning on a light she sighed, was eternal damnation really too high a price to pay for what she'd just experienced? She didn't think so because for that one night with him, for that one experience that proved all her fantasies of him had been justified and would feed many more fantasies to come eternal damnation was a small price to pay.