This is my first ever attempt at an M rated fic. There are no spoilers as it could be set at any point during any series.

Disclaimer: I don't own castle, if I did, every episode would play out like this!

It was futile. She had tried every method she could think of yet she was still wide awake. Her thoughts kept wandering to him. Every time his face popped into her head her hand began its descent below her pyjama bottoms and it took all she had to pull it away. She couldn't do it; it just made the want worse. The thought of his hand there sent waves of delicious arousal through her entire body. Without thinking she threw the covers off of her and planted her feet on the rug beside her bed with a loud thud, she stood up and headed straight for her kitchen. As she passed the clock she noticed it was two thirty, it was way too early for breakfast but it wasn't too late for Tequila.

She smiled as she poured the clear liquid into a mug, it was the first thing she grabbed out of the cupboard, she located the salt on the counter and was beginning to wish she had a supply of citrus fruits when she spotted the banana, she shrugged, not quite the same but it was all she had. She sucked the salt from her own hand and swigged back the contents of the mug, it was cheap Tequila and had an extra kick that made her face scrunch of its own accord. She took a bite of the banana, hmm not bad. She poured herself another, and another until the whole banana had been eaten. The alcohol hit her hard and quickly, something she was unaware of until she stood up and her kitchen moved. She grabbed the counter to steady herself and a laugh escaped her. She hadn't meant to get drunk…had she? She looked over to the clock on the wall, three am, she had got fall down drunk in thirty minutes. Suddenly visions of picking her dad up from the floor and hauling him to the bathroom became all too clear; she grabbed the bottle of tequila and dropped it into the bin. Go to bed Kate. She picked up her phone on the way to her bedroom and checked her messages. There was one from him, of course there was, he always text to say goodnight. The time on it said it had been sent just twenty minutes ago.

You awake?

Before she could stop herself her phone was at her ear. He answered after one ring.

"Beckett? You Okay?" There was a hint of panic in his voice that made her smile.

"Wanna come over?" She was sure she would regret this but the Tequila was making her feel brave.

"Have you been drinking?" She could never hide anything from him.

"Some. Come over Castle. Please?" She didn't wait for an answer. She hung up the phone and sat on her bed, her hand was shaking and her heart was pounding out of her chest.

Fifteen minutes later and there was a soft knock on the door. She walked to the door, the phone conversation sobering her slightly but not quelling the fire of desire that the alcohol had ignited. Her first thought when she opened her door was how damn sexy he looked. He had clearly been in bed when she called and he hadn't bothered to fix his bed hair making him look unbelievably adorable. She had to put her hand on the door to stop herself from grabbing him through the door. She looked him up and down, she couldn't help it. Went she eventually met his eyes she was faced with confusion.

"Hey Castle" He didn't respond, he just walked past her flaunting his scent through her nostrils. She inhaled deeply and closed her eyes. Big mistake. She'd forgotten about the effects of the tequila and stumbled into the door frame. Real sexy Kate she chastised herself before she felt him behind her.

"Are you okay Kate?" There was genuine concern in his eyes and that just made her want him more.

"I'm fine Castle. You want some tequila?" She grabbed the bottle out of the bin without him noticing and began pouring into a clean mug "there's a banana over there."

"Banana?"

"No limes" She shrugged. She handed him the mug and grabbed his hand to sprinkle salt on it, she looked up into his eyes and had another idea, she let go of his hand and sprinkled a generous amount of salt in the crease between thumb and forefinger on her own hand. As she offered it to him she saw him swallow and just as she was about to write this off as her worst idea ever she felt his mouth on her. She closed her eyes and she felt his tongue licking at the salt, imagining it licking her, all of her, she let out a moan and immediately regretted it. Her eyes flew open and were met with his; she knew what he was thinking. He tossed back the tequila without breaking eye contact and set the mug down on the counter.

"How much have you had Kate?" He took a step closer.

"Enough to know I want this." She gestured between them "but not too much to regret it"

He looked at her one last time, almost daring her to back track her own statement but she didn't waver, it was all he needed.

His hand went to her hair first, cradling the back of her head as he leant in and brushed his lips against hers. Goosebumps erupted immediately and she felt her knees buckle. She grabbed his jacket to steady herself which only served to intensify the kiss. Their lips moved in sync as if they were a part of the same wheel. As his tongue licked across her bottom lip she felt his other hand rest on her hip. She could feel the pad of his thumb on the bare skin as her t-shirt rode up. As the need for oxygen became paramount, he pulled away, hands still full of her.

"That was…" He couldn't find the words.

"I know right?"

"Is this really what you want Kate?" God this made her want him more. She cupped his cheek with her hand and drew him in for another kiss. She put everything she had into it. He broke away again.

"I don't just mean tonight Kate. I'm not out for a one-time thing. It's not just about sex" He raised his eyebrows as if asking her the same.

Without saying a word she lifted her t-shirt over her head. Her nipples were already hard and aching to be touched.

"I want all of it Rick" She whispered.

His hand went straight to her breast and she gasped as he pinched her nipple. This spurred him on and his other hand went straight to her ass and pulled her flush against him. She could feel exactly how excited he was and couldn't hold out any longer. She snaked her hand between them and ran her hand down his abdomen and the waistband of his sweatpants. It took her a moment to realise that he wasn't wearing any underwear.

"I sleep naked, didn't have time for underwear when you called."

"One less thing to worry about" She grinned wickedly and green met blue as she grabbed his hard length. His eyes slammed shut and his head flew back. She felt his hand leave her breast and meet the other on her ass. As she stroked him with her nails his lips found hers, she didn't even feel him pushing her pyjama pants to the floor until she nearly fell over. She pulled away from him and stepped out of them, she was now standing in front of him totally naked. The effects of the tequila were long gone but she wanted this, she wanted this so badly. He was taking his jacket off and discarding his t-shirt with light speed. She knelt in front of him and pulled his sweatpants to the floor. She took him in her hands and licked him from base to tip; now it was his knees that buckled. She felt his hands in her hair clawing at her scalp. She could feel her own wetness between her legs and her hand seemed to travel there of its own volition. As her finger entered her she moaned around him causing him to arch into her.

"Kate…not gonna last..oh god"

She stood up in front of him and licked her finger, tasting herself, making herself groan. He grabbed her wrist and sucked on the same fingers. She had to have him inside her. Now!

"Bedroom" She didn't wait for a response, didn't need to, he was right behind her. She lay on the bed and opened herself up for him. He grinned at her and began kissing her ankles, slowly, too slowly, painful almost.

"Rick! Please!" He licked from her calf to her thigh in response making her arch off of the bed. Before she had time to comprehend what he was doing she could feel his tongue making lazy circles around her hot centre.

"Oh god Rick…I'm gonna…oh…" He was driving her crazy. All of a sudden he was on top of her, positioning himself at her entrance. He leant down and kissed her so reverently that she almost wasn't ready when he thrust into her, she cried out and grabbed his ass, she wanted to feel all of him inside her. She knew she was close and so was he. He looked down at her.

"I want to watch you. I want to see you lose it because of me." So she did.

She had had sex before, of course she had, she wasn't a nun but she was pretty sure this was the first time she had made love. As he rolled off her she missed the contact immediately. He threw his arm around her and she snuggled into him.

"You were right you know." She turned her head to see his face and frowned.

"About having no idea? Honestly Kate, I've fantasised about this moment a lot but I never realised it could be this good."

She propped herself up on her arm and looked at him, really looked at him. She couldn't help the next thing that came out of her mouth.

"I love you" They both froze. Him because he couldn't believe she'd said it and her, well her for the same reason, but she meant it. His lips were on hers in a second and there were his hands in her hair again. He pulled away and rested his forehead on hers.

"I love you too Kate. So very much" He said it with every part of him, his mouth, his eyes, his hands, oh those hands, those hands were going to be the death of her. She locked eyes with him until she could feel her own growing heavy. He kissed her on the forehead and lay his head against the pillow.

"Good night Rick"

"Good night Kate"

Sleep came easy tonight. For both of them.

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