Castle belongs to his rightful owners

Ba-da

Kate Beckett stood in a small toilet booth at the precinct. She was torn between shock and surprise, happiness and fear. Was that really happening? She didn't know; it all seemed like a big blur and she felt her legs shake and her knees go weak as the dizziness reached her lower extremities so she had to sit down on the toilet lid.

Ba-da

It couldn't be real, she thought, her heart pounding heavily in her chest. It seemed like this was it, the Now she had searched for such a long time, the connection between the past and the future, the undeniable life defining Now that made her feel herself top to bottom, the rush of life running, no, pumping through her entire body with irresistible force.

Ba-da

It was some of those things you've only heard about from other people, the one life changing event, the turning point that makes you really and truly realize who you are, where you stand in life, the moment when you just know, without question or doubt, without any judgement.

Ba-da

Kate felt as if all the emotions one could possibly feel were running through her all at once totally overcoming her physical existence. There was this sudden meaning to everything, the indefinable and yet so seizeable truth. A great sensation that tickled every muscle, every nerve and sent shivers down her spine, creating goose pimples on her skin. It was hot and cold, pleasant and disturbing all the same.

Ba-da

She wanted to cry and to smile, to scream and to remain silent; she wanted to do everything to suck in every oxygen atom possible and to deepen the impulse she was feeling right now; to just remain in this position, in this awakening of her senses. Windy suspiration or the moment you want to linger on, because it is so fair, yeah, William and Johann got that right, and she would never have imagined feeling it herself.

Ba-da

It took her a million thoughts and seven heartbeats to realize what she wanted to do, what she had to do to release all the emotion and embrace the whole damn world with it. Dropping the small plastic stick in her hand she had grabbed fiercely the whole time she knew that there was only this one thing that was able to gather it all … and to make it real once and for all. It had worked for thousands of years since the dawn of mankind; it was so simple and still so portentous.

Ba-da

My dear love,

I'm quite shaking at the moment because I want to tell you so much and still just one thing.

It's probably risky to write a writer, I know, but I have to gain my thoughts through words, because I'm still too overwhelmed to stand in front of you and to look into your beautiful eyes.

I've been through a lot in my entire life and it took me thirty-two years to notice that I've never lived at all.

I never breathed properly, I never saw properly, I never listened properly, I never felt properly.

All this time I lived in the past, felt insecure, angry but I thought I did my best. I was good at my job, helped a lot of people with it, I had so many ups and downs. I thought that was living, but no, it was shallow, it was pretending.

Then there were you, you brought down my wall and shielded me from my life seizing past. You made me discover a perspective for the future, something I never thought of being possible.

For the first time in my life I felt hope and I never would have thought that this was not all, that there was still something to come, the piece between future and past, the Here and Now.

Today I woke up and it all made sense; I discovered what's right here in front of me.

I love you so much, Rick, you made me who I am. Words just can not express what you mean to me. I want to inhale everything about you, your scent, your smile, your courage, your big heart, YOU and to embrace it with my love.

I'm feeling so privileged that you found me and that you chose me to share your life with. You gave me so much, you saved my life, you are my home Castle and I can only hope to be able to give at least something back to you.

And still, you managed to give more than I can possibly return…you made me feel the life.

I am here, Castle. Right now and right here, where I always was supposed to be. This is my spot; I know that now.

You turned my life into an undeniable truth and I thank you for that with all my heart and all the love I can give.

I am yours, Castle. Always.

Kate

Castle dropped the letter he had found on his desk earlier and was paralyzed. The lines he had just read couldn't be real. Kate had made him the luckiest man in the world and he always had thought that he just didn't deserve even more of her than he already was blessed with. He couldn't breathe; his heart was pounding way too fast. Switching from the letter that had fallen to the floor to the small photo in his hand he still had to pinch himself to believe it. He had to read the words that were written on its back again and again and he still felt like he was dreaming an impossible dream.

"I thought about a million ways to show you my love but this is it.

This is the start of something beautiful"

Tears filled his eyes as he turned the photo around. And there it was. The Now, the truth.

Castle looked at their yet unborn child.