"Jungkook, you can get any girl you want!"
Said by many, these words irritate Jungkook. Without reaction, he normally waves it off. Jungkook never deeply contemplated such things, although he never knew why he was so unsuccessful in looking at girls the way his hyungs did. On the contrary, it was quite easy for him to look at his old Busan friends that way. It was never serious; just-attraction.
"Jungkook-yah, you can get any girl you want!", Taehyung whines from across the dining table in the dorm. With the seven members eating around the table, Jungkook raises an eyebrow at Tae.
"-yah? I'm about five times your size, Tae-hyung."
Taehyung shoots daggers at Jungkook. As the dirty-blonde grumbles into his bowl, Jungkook feels his heart sinking again at this statement. He unknowingly pauses from eating and looks down at nothing. Jungkook can feel eyes on him to his left, heaving him back to his senses. He pastes his face neutral but he can still sense an attention on him from Yoongi.
"Maknae cleans dishes!" Hoseok declares skidding out of the dinning room with the some of other hyungs.
"I would help but I just made the food. I also promised my older brother a phone call" Seokjin conveys, with hands on his hips.
"No, it's fine. I'll make them pay later." Jungkook says with a reassuring grin.
Truthfully, he doesn't have any motivation for chores. Nevertheless, he collects the plates from the table when Yoongi appears quietly by the entrance of the room.
"Need any help?" He inquires, face tilted toward the floor, looking up at the younger. Jungkook swallows, hoping Yoongi did not notice Jungkook's reaction to Tae's comment at the table earlier.
"Ah, no. I'm capable. Thank you, though."
He nods in the direction of the older, but Yoongi counters,
"I didn't question your capabilities, dumb ass."
The older steps briskly toward the sink and begins to warm the water. Jungkook presses his lips together to stifle the smirk Yoongi has caused. Jungook recognizes Yoongi's ways of interacting and found them quite amusing as well as intriguing. Jungkook knows he is a stand-offish type of person but Yoongi does care. Jungkook knows not to mistake his snideness for apathy.
Yoongi stands at the sink, soaping the dishes.
"Hey, I didn't say you could do all of it." Jungkook quips as Yoongi washes the tableware. While he cleans the dishes and Yoongi rinses them, the elder quietly clears his throat.
"So Tae-hyung doesn't really think when he talks, huh?"
Jungkook instinctively freezes, eyes snapping to Yoongi.
So much for not noticing...
Jungkook chokes out a uniform smile he so easily learned to perfect. His face becomes hot and his upper lip feel like it is perspiring. Jungkook prays to the God that put him in this mess that his face isn't bright red with secrecy.
"Ah, Tae was just being stupid." He can hear himself speaking like he has gravel stuck at the back of his throat. His hands grip his sponge searching Yoongi's face for his thoughts. Of course, Yoongi, is enigma which Jungkook fails to decode. Yoongi merely looks up at the younger. He blinks at Jungkook a few times and then returns to working in the sink. Jungkook also continues working but glances over to see a unfamiliar sensation in Yoongi. Almost-defeat.
12:51 AM
Jungkook lays flat on his back staring into the dark as Namjoon puffs in his sleep. He has been suspended in the same position for so long he cannot tell if he is awake anymore. He thinks about being this way and of what Yoongi said to him. He thinks about the look on Yoongi's face. Jungkook wonders what Yoongi's true thoughts were. He is always so difficult to read.
Is it intentional? Or is that just how he is?
The group had rehearsal in the morning and he has no time for this. His attempts to sleep were fruitless and he is tired of thinking. Although Namjoon is snoring loudly, Jungkook silently swings his legs over the bed and slips out of their room.
1:00 AM
It would be insensible to make a whole pot of coffee so despite his hatred for coffee makers, he grabs a small cup and turns on the blasted machine. He sits with his hands folded in his lap while he waits for the coffee to brew. A glance at the clock above the sink and he knows he is going to have to pull an all-nighter. Even if he falls asleep right away, he wouldn't be able to wake up. The coffee spurts into the mug and he lifts himself to sit on the counter, something Jin would scold him for. Sipping his coffee, he hears a shuffle somewhere in the house and deeply considers it is Jin somehow sensing Jungkook is on the counter.
After a minute, a half-closed-eyed Yoongi appears at the kitchen entrance.
"How'd I know it was you." Yoongi says lazily, rubbing his eyes. Jungkook awkwardly looks into his mug for words to say.
"I'll make you some coffee?" he manages to choke out.
"I'll pass. I'm not a coffee-at-1-in-the-morning-kind-of-guy." Yoongi shifts his weight onto one leg.
"Did i wake you?" Jungkook implores, apologetically.
"Yeah." The older replies without hesitation.
A smile tugs at Jungkook's face. Yoongi leans against the wall with his eyes closed. Jungkook takes the moment to really look at Yoongi. Jungkook takes in Yoongi's lean stature and narrow width-quite the opposite of himself. Yoongi wears a long over sized t-shirt and basketball shorts. He must have been cold because he was wearing amusing red fuzzy ankle socks. Yoongi opens his eyes but his head stays rested against the wall.
"Did i say something before?"
How does he always know what I'm thinking?
"No." Jungkook's artificial smile arises without much work.
There it is again-that face from before.
Mingled with the presence of exhaustion, the face that Yoongi made before was resurfacing. And Jungkook can't stand it. He would take a risk to stop Yoongi from looking like that.
"Maybe Tae's comment got to me."
Yoongi looks almost startled.
"So are you going to talk or just stare into your coffee? I mean I didn't get up at 1:00 for you to dodge me again" Yoongi says irritably but softly.
Jungkook smiles fondly at Yoongi as he stands up and gestures Yoongi to follow him into the lounge.
"So no coffee?"
"I will never understand you"
1:28 AM
"I'm just saying that we don't benefit from it. What is something on the other side of the universe going to do for us?"
Yoongi takes a deep breath before arguing.
"Have you seen the sky? Don't you feel pulled to it? Isn't it important to not only further our intelligence but to experience it's beauty?"
Jungkook played with his empty mug.
"Well, as beautiful as it is, we have a lot to fix here before we go out there."
"Now you're altering your argument. Although I agree with that, before the colonies, Europe had plenty of problems and poverty but that didn't stop them from exploring and expanding... I know thats insensitive. Maybe I just wanna see space more than earth."
With this Jungkook stands up and walks away to his room.
"What? Did I win already?" Yoongi whispers after him.
Jungkook quietly grabs the comforter off his bed, Namjoon remaining in an unmoving position. He returns to the lounge but not before Yoongi watches him grab a bag of crackers. He lifts the blanket over the two. Sitting fairly distant from Yoongi, Jungkook had only his calves covered by the comforter when Yoongi snorts,
"Why is it only on me? What'd you even get this comforter for if you aren't going to sit under it?"
Yoongi lifts up an edge gesturing Jungkook under the the blanket. Jungkook feels his face solidify and slides less than an eighth of an inch closer to Yoongi. Yoongi squints at him in annoyance. He breathes a "jesus" and swiftly moves himself instead toward Jungkook nullifying any space between them. Their thighs touch and Jungkook could tell his face was definitely taking a pink color by Yoongi scoffing at him.
1:41AM
Rousing an unconscious Yoongi from his slumber is a known death wish. All of the hyungs knew this and lived it. It was simple: wake up Yoongi, you wake up in the afterlife. Such is why Jungkook is quite puzzled as to why Yoongi wasn't midst murder by now.
2:04 AM
The usual alert of Jungkook's consciousness had slowly been fading and it was making him far too silly and comfortable as many become when sleepy. He started blinking slowly at Yoongi and speaking lethargically
"You're tired. You should go to bed."
"What? I'm the one who woke you up in the first place."
"What's your point?"
"Well are -you- going to go to sleep?"
"No, I'm not tired anymore."
"Well I'm not going to leave you alone that's stupid, you're stupid." Jungkook rolls his eyes dramatically at Yoongi. Yoongi raises his eyebrows at Jungkook.
"Fine, want to see to some movie?" he suggests.
On the laptop screen, Yoongi streams some forgotten history-thriller.
"Why do you watch it with captions?"
"It lets me immerse myself into everything the characters are saying so that I don't miss anything"
"Hm"
Feet on an ottoman, they lay parallel on their backs with the laptop on Yoongi's legs. The movie is surprisingly captivating but Jungkook suddenly feels a light weight on his shoulder. He slightly jumps but peeks to his left to see Yoongi resting his head on Jungkook's shoulder, breathing steadily, indicating he is asleep.
Jungkook knows he can not move without waking Yoongi. He only partially sees Yoongi's face but he looks long and hard at him. He studies each one of his eyelashes and the dip in his nose. His recently blond-toned hair ( he complained that all of his hair was going to fall out for the thousandth time) was sweeping into his eyelash line. Yoongi's parted lips are slightly chapped and takr a peach-red colour.
Stop looking at him like this.
But Jungkook can only admire Yoongi's soft features.
He thinks about laying his head on Yoongi's but rejects the idea. He pulls at the headphone in Yoongi's ear and closes the computer, setting it aside.
He'll be stiff in the morning.
Jungkook begins to get up to wake Yoongi, in hopes to move him back to his room.
Yoongi grumbles deeply and Jungkook sputters a cackle at him.
"Come on, you're gonna hurt in the morning."
"It's the morning. It's gonna hurt no matter what." Yoongi barely mutters.
"You're so dramatic."
"Mhmm."
"I'll drag you to your bed, hyung."
"Try me." Yoongi opens one eye and Jungkook wonders how anyone can make such a sour face with only one eye open.
"Please, hyung?"
Yoongi's eyes close.
"Not for a hundred dollars."
"Not even for me?" Jungkook smiles a goofy grin.
"Especially not you."
"Well you know what that means, hyung."
This time both of Yoongi's eyes open.
"You chose the hard way."
Yoongi looks at him with disbelief as Jungkook slides his arms under the small of Y's back and under his thighs.
"Jungkook, I swear to God, I will-"
When Yoongi's voice starts growing louder Jungkook interrupts him.
"Shhhh, you're going to wake everyone up."
Jungkook is glad he cut him off because whatever Yoongi was about to swear to, his expression looked like he was really about to prove it.
"Do I look like a child, Jungkook?"
But he was already in an amusing cradling position with Yoongi, hoisting him off to his room. Jungkook walked through the house to Yoongi and Seokjin's joint room. He gently opens the door to find the room empty.
"Seokjin's in with Jimin. He was teaching him to knit or something. He must've fallen- wait a minute what are you still doing holding me? Put me down. This is unacceptable. I am five years older than you. You can't be serious," Yoongi whispers furiously.
Jungkook snickers as he lays Yoongi down on his bed and stands over him.
"Want me to read you a bedtime story? How about a glass of milk?"
Yoongi actually appears to be steaming at this point.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You just looked really cute"
Yoongi peers up at him.
Jungkook can almost hear the record scratch.
SHIT SHIT SHIT. Okay, okay. Play it cool.
"Heh... Nighty-Night, Yoongi-yah. Sweet dreams!"
Jungkook tries to say this jokingly and goofy but he can feel himself falling apart where he stands and needs to escape from this room. He begins to back up out of the room when Yoongi suddenly reaches his hand up to Jungkook. Yoongi grabs and holds onto Jungkook's sleeve.
"You said you weren't going to leave me alone before we watched the movie." Yoongi murmurs, looking away, his eyebrows furrowed.
Jungkook peers at Yoongi with complete confusion and without noticing he replied with a,
"Huh?"
What does he mean?
Yoongi is not meeting Jungkook's line of gaze but his grasp on the younger's sleeve remains. Jungkook cocks his head and tries to meet Yoongi's eyes.
He wants me to stay with him? Is that it?
Jungkook lowers himself to his knees by the bed to be eye-level with him. Without a word, Jungkook asks him with his eyes. Yoongi blinks at him with hesitated approval. So with clear understanding but still uncertainty, Jungkook climbs onto the edge of Yoongi's poster bed. He lays himself easily on his side, his arm draping over his own waist, facing Yoongi in uniform.
They had been adhered to one another's eyes, fixed to only the other's face since Yoongi had clutched onto Jungkook's sleeve-which he was still holding onto, giving Jungkook a heightened awareness of his arm. Jungkook's body is still. Despite this, his mind races. Incoherent thoughts flood his mind- the levy of his head entirely collapsing. This is not going to end well for him. He can not feel his fingertips and someone threw a toaster in the bathtub that is his stomach. Yoongi's eyes are hooded in the eye-level of him and his abdomen sparks.
What is he thinking?
Yoongi maintains an indistinguishable gaze-another mystery to Jungkook.
Suddenly, Yoongi's hook tenses around his sleeve. A hand is abruptly brought up to Jungkook's chest and grips the neckline of his shirt, in addition to the sleeve. Jungkook only breaks his gaze on Yoongi's eyes for the first time in what seems like forever to look down at the hand and back at Yoongi. The older's face remains solidly neutral. Without warning, Yoongi's hands begin to tremble at the grasp of Jungkook's clothing. The shaking escalates to Yoongi's whole body and he interrupts their staring contest by dipping his head, tucking away his face. He slightly drags his knees closer to his chest.
What's wrong with him?
Jungkook brings a unsure but fond hand to the top of Yoongi's head, but an unsurprising shake of the head rejects Jungkook's hand and refuses to look up. Without thinking, Jungkook finds a way to coax the release of Yoongi's hand from his shirt by replacing it with his hand. Yoongi's hand is limp in Jungkook's gentle grasp. He softly places his other hand on the back of Yoongi's neck and the older instinctively hazards a peak up at Jungkook. His face is no longer unreadable with his usual blank veil. He is crying. The cascading tears, surge down Yoongi's face toward the bed sheets. In a split second, Jungkook decides to disregard all of the many warning signs. Without much labor, he impulsively drags Yoongi's body into his. Jungkook essentially lifts the older off of the mattress to haul him closer, encasing his body with his arms. Yoongi initially hesitates, pulling away rigidly. Although, being enveloped in Jungkook's arms, he ultimately dissolves into the shelter of the younger's body. With a cheek against Jungkook's chest, Yoongi shudders in muted whimpers.
"Please don't cry. Please be okay."
Jungkook interweaves his fingers delicately amidst the strands of Yoongi's hair in efforts to ebb his tremors. Sooner or later, Yoongi's breathing balances and the silent sobs go from faltering cries to deep breathing, indicating sleep.
Jungkook strokes Yoongi's hair and neck long after he falls asleep. He dips his head and rests his lips on Yoongi's forehead. He forgot how weary he was before and drifts out of consciousness.