I wonder I she knows how much I still love her. I wonder if she ever realised before she left me behind. Surely she must have known; she had drunk my blood before she left, and as I was wracked with an overwhelming sense of despair of losing 'her', all I could think about was the human girl who I had lost to a pureblood.
Needless to say, it was ecstasy when a pureblood sinks its fangs into you. Unbelievable bliss. She was so timid, so hesitant but by the time I'd finally felt her fangs at my neck, my sick twisted mind had unlocked the desire that I had been harbouring for the girl that I wished with all my heart was still here. But this desire was wrong on so many levels. She was someone else's- I was just happened to be the tool of 'protection to her'. How could I fall so hard for something and someone that wasn't meant to be? How could I have fallen for what she was, and what I'd sworn to kill until my last breath?
My mind kept on replaying on what Shizuka –the pureblood who had murder my family and then proceeded to turn me into a level E vampire- had whispered to Yuki and she'd bitten me for the second time.
"The choices you make, are making him suffer" The woman who I had despised the most really with the nail on the head. It wasn't Yuki's fault – well not all of it anyway. I needed someone, anyone, to protect. I needed to be a shield. I wanted to carry the burdens of the world around me upon my shoulder, but at the same time I resented the very thought of it. I needed some who needed me; like Ichiru, who needs me. At some point, I believed I was made to protect. Which is why my entire world came crumbling when Yuki had turned into a Pureblood, and by Kaname Kuran no less. I had…forgotten my original role, too caught up in the depths of Yuki's brown eyes, the way she smells like a fruit salad and the many times she had willingly let me drink her blood…a Pureblood's blood. It wasn't fair, but at the same time it was. I never deserved Yuki's kindness, her gentle hands, and her smile. Why do we always yearn for the things we can never have? Is it the temptation, like back when Adam and Eve? Or is it just in all human nature to be the best of the best? Yuki deserved someone better than me, the one who caused her to fret and worry about all day.
But no matter what, Kaname Kuran will pay for what he did to Yuki. And if I have to kill her –the vampire who is haboring the body of the girl who I had loved so dearly- to shoot a bullet in his head with Bloody Rose, then that's what I'll do.
Because Yuki, everything I do, I do it for you.