Forcing It Into The Light
Author: Amanda_S (adnamaschackow@hotmail.com)
Spoilers: Milagro
Category: Mulder/Scully romance, Post-Ep
Summary: What happened after Mulder found Scully on the floor
Archive: You may post this wherever. Just send me an email with
the URL of the archive. As long as I'm given credit, and no one
makes any money, I don't really care where this ends up.
Disclaimer: These characters, this show, this episode all belong
to Chris Carter, FOX, Ten Thirteen, and all those people. The
only thing I take credit for is the particular language used here
and for the plot that imagined happening after the episode,
Milagro.
Author's Note: If you liked it, give me feedback at
adnamaschackow@hotmail.com, and read my other writing, posted at
FanFiction.net, gossamer, and
http://www.geocities.com/catcherofstarslikefireflies/
If you hated it, please write me, flame me, scream at me at
curly_keya@yahoo.com.
(1/3)
It had nearly been dragged out of my chest. Nearly ripped through
every defense. Nearly destroyed bone and flesh, revealing my
ultimate vulnerability. As the man had hovered above me, I could
almost see my heart in his hand, still beating from the residual
electrical impulses.
And I had allowed him in willingly.
Because unlike anyone else, he simply imagined himself a giant, and
stepped over my barriers with a single stride.
Because he was unaffected by the science. By the logic. By the
protocol, rules, regulations, and formalities. He only observed. The
emotion. The aesthetic. The objective. Then played back his beliefs
and interpretations in romantic, poetic, personally invading lines,
implying, leading, teasing at what lay behind my barriers,
threatening to drag what lay in the shadows into the light, to set
it free.
And instead of running, I was drawn.
I had, for so long, denied my heart.
And while I feared him, I longed for what he gave me. He reminded me
of that part of me. That it could respond.
And so, when I gasped back to life, realizing that the man was gone,
that the fingers I felt in my chest, on my heart, were only
imaginary, a lingering memory, the barriers lay in shreds.
When I realized it was Mulder holding me, my newly freed heart would
not allow me to begin reconstructing the broken and battered
barriers that had so long protected me.
I cried and sobbed, shaking and moaning. Uncontrolled. As the
attacker's hand had entered my chest, it had left much damage to
those living protections. My weakness, my longing, my loneliness all
pressed and throbbed against him, revealing the depth of my
vulnerability.
I felt his breath against my ear as he spoke, asking me if I was all
right.
My heart was in control now, and it could only draw him closer.
Eventually, he scooped me into his arms, removed me from the floor,
and took me into his bedroom, lying me on the bed. He stood to leave,
nearly ripping my heart from my chest once more. Desperately I
grabbed at him.
"No, stay. Please."
The barriers were returning of their own volition, but my logic was
still in shock. And so, what for so long had been denied, hidden,
now revealed itself, taking control of my body and my actions.
I drew him back to me, holding him close against my chest.
"I need you, Mulder. Don't go. Don't ever leave me. I love you."
********************************************
(2/3)
I was powerless. At his will.
He had ripped through the physical barriers, overstepped the
emotional, ignored the personal. I tried to fight back, but there
was nothing I could do. Without my protection. Without my heart.
Without my barriers. Without anything to keep him from my
vulnerability, he was in control. I was controlled only by him.
By fear.
Screaming in agony. In pain. I could feel his hand closing around
my heart, threatening to rip it from its place within my chest. I
let out a final scream, feeling the first beginnings of tearing.
"Scully."
Mulder's voice pierced through the fear and the pain, and I
opened my eyes to find myself, enveloped in darkness, and held in
warm, strong, caring arms.
My breath and pulse raced as I slowly realized I had been
dreaming. That I was lying in Mulder's bed, wrapped tightly in
his arms as he whispered in my ears.
I trembled from the sensation and stared at him through the
darkness.
"Were you having a nightmare?"
I could only nod as I stared into his wide, dark eyes, that
barely glimmered in the dim light. One of his hands was caressing
my hair and the other was wrapped around my waist and held me
close against his body and his fingers caressed my back.
He was waiting for me to speak. To acknowledge what had happened.
But I was still lacking my barriers. My strength. The pain was
still too raw, untreated and unmedicated, and I couldn't face the
horrifying memories that were spinning around in my head.
He was waiting for me to repeat my earlier confession, to re-
expose my vulnerability to him. He wanted me to entrust him with
my heart. With my emotions. With all that I had hidden for so
long.
Unable to speak, I only cuddled closer, burying my face in his
chest so he couldn't see the tears in my eyes. Later, I realized
that he surely felt there dampness through the thin fabric of his
shirt, and knew the truth despite my meager effort.
With a quiet little moan, I nuzzled him slightly, hugged him
close and drifted back to sleep, with his warmth as my
protections.
********************************************
(3/3)
Instead of gripping fear, I was awakened by the soft caress of
warmth, skittering across the rim of my ear, down my throat, then
up again.
And I allowed it willingly.
I allowed the lips and fingers to roam my skin, moaning, holding
my eyes shut to hide reality. I could not remember who this was.
Why I had trusted them. But the warmth and smell were familiar.
Caring.
And I awoke with my walls down.
Wrapped comfortable around a body, pressed heart to heart, the
throbbing a calming salve. I felt the part of me that I kept
hidden growing, strengthening itself as it pursued its interests,
subtly responding to caring touch.
A second hand rose to become parallel to the other on my cheeks,
as the body rolled me on my back, and settled above me.
Two warm thumbs traced down my cheeks very lightly, almost
tickling the soft skin. That warm, sweet breath was close to my
face, but I dared not open my eyes for fear that it would end.
That with the ending of sensation, my heart would throw back into
the shadows, behind the barricades.
"Scully, are you awake?"
His voice opened my eyes, forcing me to see him.
Mulder was staring at me, and I could see fear and apprehension
in his worried eyes.
As much as he had wanted my barriers to fall, the sight of my
vulnerability shocked him. Scared him. Filled him with great fear
and concern, edged with guilt and regret.
"Mulder, I'm alright. I'm fine."
His eyes dropped momentarily, staring at the sticky remnants of
the blood that were still clinging to my chest and my blouse.
I bring one hand up to raise his face to look into mine.
"Really, I'm fine. I was fine the minute I saw you."
There was a spark of recollection in his eyes.
"I-I was so afraid for you. If you would have... If you had...
Scully. I love you, too."
********************************************
END
Feedback: adnamaschackow@hotmail.com
Author: Amanda_S (adnamaschackow@hotmail.com)
Spoilers: Milagro
Category: Mulder/Scully romance, Post-Ep
Summary: What happened after Mulder found Scully on the floor
Archive: You may post this wherever. Just send me an email with
the URL of the archive. As long as I'm given credit, and no one
makes any money, I don't really care where this ends up.
Disclaimer: These characters, this show, this episode all belong
to Chris Carter, FOX, Ten Thirteen, and all those people. The
only thing I take credit for is the particular language used here
and for the plot that imagined happening after the episode,
Milagro.
Author's Note: If you liked it, give me feedback at
adnamaschackow@hotmail.com, and read my other writing, posted at
FanFiction.net, gossamer, and
http://www.geocities.com/catcherofstarslikefireflies/
If you hated it, please write me, flame me, scream at me at
curly_keya@yahoo.com.
(1/3)
It had nearly been dragged out of my chest. Nearly ripped through
every defense. Nearly destroyed bone and flesh, revealing my
ultimate vulnerability. As the man had hovered above me, I could
almost see my heart in his hand, still beating from the residual
electrical impulses.
And I had allowed him in willingly.
Because unlike anyone else, he simply imagined himself a giant, and
stepped over my barriers with a single stride.
Because he was unaffected by the science. By the logic. By the
protocol, rules, regulations, and formalities. He only observed. The
emotion. The aesthetic. The objective. Then played back his beliefs
and interpretations in romantic, poetic, personally invading lines,
implying, leading, teasing at what lay behind my barriers,
threatening to drag what lay in the shadows into the light, to set
it free.
And instead of running, I was drawn.
I had, for so long, denied my heart.
And while I feared him, I longed for what he gave me. He reminded me
of that part of me. That it could respond.
And so, when I gasped back to life, realizing that the man was gone,
that the fingers I felt in my chest, on my heart, were only
imaginary, a lingering memory, the barriers lay in shreds.
When I realized it was Mulder holding me, my newly freed heart would
not allow me to begin reconstructing the broken and battered
barriers that had so long protected me.
I cried and sobbed, shaking and moaning. Uncontrolled. As the
attacker's hand had entered my chest, it had left much damage to
those living protections. My weakness, my longing, my loneliness all
pressed and throbbed against him, revealing the depth of my
vulnerability.
I felt his breath against my ear as he spoke, asking me if I was all
right.
My heart was in control now, and it could only draw him closer.
Eventually, he scooped me into his arms, removed me from the floor,
and took me into his bedroom, lying me on the bed. He stood to leave,
nearly ripping my heart from my chest once more. Desperately I
grabbed at him.
"No, stay. Please."
The barriers were returning of their own volition, but my logic was
still in shock. And so, what for so long had been denied, hidden,
now revealed itself, taking control of my body and my actions.
I drew him back to me, holding him close against my chest.
"I need you, Mulder. Don't go. Don't ever leave me. I love you."
********************************************
(2/3)
I was powerless. At his will.
He had ripped through the physical barriers, overstepped the
emotional, ignored the personal. I tried to fight back, but there
was nothing I could do. Without my protection. Without my heart.
Without my barriers. Without anything to keep him from my
vulnerability, he was in control. I was controlled only by him.
By fear.
Screaming in agony. In pain. I could feel his hand closing around
my heart, threatening to rip it from its place within my chest. I
let out a final scream, feeling the first beginnings of tearing.
"Scully."
Mulder's voice pierced through the fear and the pain, and I
opened my eyes to find myself, enveloped in darkness, and held in
warm, strong, caring arms.
My breath and pulse raced as I slowly realized I had been
dreaming. That I was lying in Mulder's bed, wrapped tightly in
his arms as he whispered in my ears.
I trembled from the sensation and stared at him through the
darkness.
"Were you having a nightmare?"
I could only nod as I stared into his wide, dark eyes, that
barely glimmered in the dim light. One of his hands was caressing
my hair and the other was wrapped around my waist and held me
close against his body and his fingers caressed my back.
He was waiting for me to speak. To acknowledge what had happened.
But I was still lacking my barriers. My strength. The pain was
still too raw, untreated and unmedicated, and I couldn't face the
horrifying memories that were spinning around in my head.
He was waiting for me to repeat my earlier confession, to re-
expose my vulnerability to him. He wanted me to entrust him with
my heart. With my emotions. With all that I had hidden for so
long.
Unable to speak, I only cuddled closer, burying my face in his
chest so he couldn't see the tears in my eyes. Later, I realized
that he surely felt there dampness through the thin fabric of his
shirt, and knew the truth despite my meager effort.
With a quiet little moan, I nuzzled him slightly, hugged him
close and drifted back to sleep, with his warmth as my
protections.
********************************************
(3/3)
Instead of gripping fear, I was awakened by the soft caress of
warmth, skittering across the rim of my ear, down my throat, then
up again.
And I allowed it willingly.
I allowed the lips and fingers to roam my skin, moaning, holding
my eyes shut to hide reality. I could not remember who this was.
Why I had trusted them. But the warmth and smell were familiar.
Caring.
And I awoke with my walls down.
Wrapped comfortable around a body, pressed heart to heart, the
throbbing a calming salve. I felt the part of me that I kept
hidden growing, strengthening itself as it pursued its interests,
subtly responding to caring touch.
A second hand rose to become parallel to the other on my cheeks,
as the body rolled me on my back, and settled above me.
Two warm thumbs traced down my cheeks very lightly, almost
tickling the soft skin. That warm, sweet breath was close to my
face, but I dared not open my eyes for fear that it would end.
That with the ending of sensation, my heart would throw back into
the shadows, behind the barricades.
"Scully, are you awake?"
His voice opened my eyes, forcing me to see him.
Mulder was staring at me, and I could see fear and apprehension
in his worried eyes.
As much as he had wanted my barriers to fall, the sight of my
vulnerability shocked him. Scared him. Filled him with great fear
and concern, edged with guilt and regret.
"Mulder, I'm alright. I'm fine."
His eyes dropped momentarily, staring at the sticky remnants of
the blood that were still clinging to my chest and my blouse.
I bring one hand up to raise his face to look into mine.
"Really, I'm fine. I was fine the minute I saw you."
There was a spark of recollection in his eyes.
"I-I was so afraid for you. If you would have... If you had...
Scully. I love you, too."
********************************************
END
Feedback: adnamaschackow@hotmail.com