The bar was quiet. The celebration had wound down, everyone exhausted after the last few days. Denzel and Marlene succumbed to fatigue long before the adults and were both snoring away up in their room. Barret had taken Cloud's office for the night. Yuffie sprawled on the sofa in the living room, Nanki curled up on the rug and who knew where Vincent was. Cid had grumbled but put up no resistance as Reeve called him away to start arranging transport for the sick to Sector five. Tifa had overheard an insistence that those in Rocket Town would be the first passengers destined for the church.
It would be nice if they could have just a little downtime after the last few days. But because of Cloud's actions the world still turned and life went on. Could now go on for many more than it had. Eliminating geostigma from the populace took precedence over their celebrations. Beyond that, money was still tight as the post-Mako world struggled to stabilize. Maybe soon they would be able to sit in peace and gather Avalanche around to take stock of the world.
Tifa finished washing the last few glasses with as little noise as she could. She draped a spare blanket over Yuffie, the two extra years doing nothing to improve her sleeping position. Yuffie still slept in such a way as to maximise the space she occupied. Stepping over the twitching Nanaki she pulled the door to and again felt the temptation to take a day off tomorrow. Another day to get used to the changes. To get used to Cloud being around again. Tifa sighed as she checked the outer doors. No. Not now anyway. Too much in flux, especially after the new devastation in Midgar and Edge. Wait. Where was Cloud? He had been with the others as they drank, helped coax Denzel and Marlene up to their room and shown Barret where he could crash. And after that?
Tifa frowned. She wanted to check if Fenrir was in the garage. No, that would not work. The bike would be missing regardless - it was somewhere in Midgar right now. Cloud was not in the bar. Maybe he had decided to share the room with Barret? She was not going to let him do that. No matter how they arranged it, neither of them was sleeping on the floor tonight. Tifa slipped her feet from her boots and padded upstairs. She paused at Cloud's office, wondering if she should peek in when something caught her attention.
Sat with his arms around his legs, head cradled on his knees, was Cloud. He was sat outside her bedroom door. Tifa crept over to him, moving to her hands and knees as she reached the top of the stairs. Cloud jerked awake as she shook his arm, his eyes panicked but he soon calmed once he saw her.
"Tifa," he smiled but still looked nervous. He was too loud.
She shushed him. "Everyone else is asleep. What are you doing out here?" she whispered.
A faint flush touched his cheeks. "I... don't have anywhere else to sleep."
Tifa sighed. "Silly. There's a double bed in there still."
"What about you?"
"I was suggesting we share it again." Cloud smiled at her words, but looked distracted. It had been nice to sleep beside Cloud before the geostigma caught him. It had started without much conscious thought on her part, and he had never objected. After dozing off together beneath the Highwind, Tifa found herself doing the same thing in the days that followed. As they hiked away from the City of the Ancients, during their stop-overs in Junon, Kalm and then the ruins of Midgar. And after construction was complete on the Seventh Heaven the double bed in the third bedroom was for them both. And that had seemed to be enough for them both. At least enough for her. She had hoped it was the same for Cloud. But it was awkward to talk about. There were assumptions about what sharing a bed meant, and she was reluctant to talk about the situation. She had almost mentioned something to Yuffie once. And after a few too many glasses of wine, almost Elena too.
Sex was not something that had ever become a factor in their time together, or up until this point in her life. Tifa had explored her body during her teenage years. She heard the crude gossiping of the boys in Midgar, the more salacious stories in Midgar but none of it seemed that important. She felt at peace with Cloud around, the urge to engage in intimate physical contact never happening. The mechanical aspects were not alien, but she felt no desire to initiate anything. Cloud likewise had made no move. It was enough to lean against each other, or lay so their sides brushed each other. And until he left Tifa had thought he was fine with the situation. She did not want sex. Neither, it seemed, did Cloud. But she wondered in that uncertain time when Cloud was away if she had been assuming too much. Should she have talked to Cloud? Told him about her lack of interest? Should she tell him she was not interested in physical love, but still wanted him to stay with her? And even before his disappearance there had been his growing tendency to sleep in what had been Barret's room, now his office. The double bed was much more comfortable than the cot he had in there and she stressed she would not mind him returning late.
And now here they were. Cloud left with nowhere else and Tifa offering him her bed. How would he interpret that offer? She led him into the bedroom, ducking behind her screen to change into her night-wear. When she emerged again Cloud was on his former side of the bed dressed in t-shirt and boxers, staring around the room. It had been some time since he was last in here. Tifa slid into bed beside him, clicked off the light and pulled the covers up to her chin.
She felt Cloud lie back, fidgeting for a moment as he got comfortable.
"Tifa?"
She tensed, wondering what he was going to say. "Yes?"
"I need to apologise."
She almost smiled in the darkness. "You've got nothing to apologise for. You saved the world. Again."
He chuckled. "There is that. No, but I mean I have to apologise to you specifically. While I was away, I... I thought about a lot of things. Like us."
Her heart skipped a beat. Was this to be a confession? "What about us?" she asked.
"I feel I need to be honest about how things are between us. I mean, ah, I-." He took a deep breath. "I don't want to have sex with you."
Tifa rolled over, seeing mako eyes glowing in the dark. "Where did that come from?" she asked.
"Cid. And some from Barret. And a little from Yuffie. And Reno. They were all talking about giving us space tonight and taking the kids elsewhere. And I realised that they thought we'd been doing... things before this. And we hadn't and I thought it was fine, but we never talked about it, so I don't know if you wanted to and..." he trailed off.
"Cloud? Do you want to have sex?" No response. "Cloud?"
"...no." He breathed. "But I still want to be with you. I just don't think I can-." He coughed.
Tifa reached out a cautious hand to his arm. "It's okay Cloud. It's okay. Just this is nice. I just like sharing the bed with you like this."
"But-."
Tifa shook her head, smiling more. "No. It's fine. And I do have to confess as well, I'm not really interested in sex either."
Mako eyes blinked. "...really?"
"Really. We don't have to do anything. I care about you, I hope you care about me. As long as we're happy with each other, there's no need to change anything."
"I care about you too," Cloud stressed. "Thank you," he added after a moment. "I... just kept worrying that I was disappointing you by not doing anything."
"So was I..." Tifa smiled as she fidgeted. "All you need to do is come home and spend time with us. We may not be a real family but we're still together."
"I was thinking about that too. I mean, earlier today." Cloud said, rolling onto his back. "If we're happy not doing all those expected... things, then I don't see why we need to follow anyone else's view on families. You're my family Tifa. So is Denzel and Marlene. And Barret. And Yuffie and Vincent. And Cid and Shera. And Nanaki and Reeve. And Cait Sith."
"And Aeris," Tifa added.
"And Zack."
"They're all my family too," she said. "So if we are a family then this is your home."
"I'm glad I came back."
"Me too. Welcome home Cloud."