A/N:This is a one-shot song fic to StarSixtyNine, that I had promised a while back and finally received some inspiration for. Chantel, I wasn't sure which Hardy you ask for when you wanted this, but I believe it was Matt, if not, just cross out all the Matt's and make them Jeff's if I'm wrong, lmao!
Enjoy and review!
Disclaimer:The song is 'Sorry' by Justin Nozuka, I own nothing but the idea.
Falling Into Pieces
By Shelliosity
I sat at the dinning room table of mine and Matt's home, waiting on the phone for him to pick up. This stress was destroying me, It's been three days since he left and I haven't heard one word from him since, Jeff told me he just needed a little while to cool down, but how long will it be until he finally comes home? He knows I'm sorry for fighting with him, it's been a constant problem between us though.
"Hey, this is Matt, leave a message and I'll get back to you later."
I sighed before the beep could catch it and then hung up for phone. Getting up, I walk over to the kitchen door, pushing it open and forcing my hand to put the cordless phone down onto it's charger. I lean my head against the wall, trying to fight the tears, I haven't felt like this in a while. I wiped my eyes as I pressed my back to the wall and slowly fall to the floor, clutching my knee's close to me.
I feel so out of place, fights never lasted this long. Maybe I should call again? I haven't left one message since this all started. Should I? I mean, if I let him know I'm deeply sorry for everything, he'd call back, right?
On my knees,
I never meant what I said.
Oh baby, please Come home, my world is falling in two pieces.
As I reached for the phone again, it started to ring. My eyes lit up for a second, but when I looked at the caller ID it didn't say Matt. It was Jeff. I frowned, hesitating to whether I wanted to answer the phone or not, but I decided that it might be a good idea if I did. I needed to get my mind off of Matt.
"What's up?" I answered, brushing my right hand through my hair.
"Hey listen, I wanted to hang out with you for the day. I know you've been pretty down lately, so I want you to get out of the house and just have a little fun," Jeff says.
"And do what exactly?" I questioned. Jeff was my best friend and we met about two years before I started dating his brother. I had the biggest crush on Jeff, but Matt was just something else. I suddenly started to remember the good things about Matt, like the fact that he didn't get jealous anytime I wanted to hang around with his brother.
"Well, we could hang out in my studio and mess around with some of the tracks or we can do some motocross, order some pizza and watch episodes of the Twilight Zone. It's really whatever you want to do," he answers.
"Actually Jeff, I was just about to lay down and relax for a bit, but if anything changes, I'll let you know," Where did this come all of the sudden?
"Okay?" I ask.
"No problem," Jeff replies with a small sigh, "Please, Channy, try not to dwell on all of this. Matt will come around, it just takes a while."
That's when I started to remember all of the things about Matt that made me want to scream like Vickie Guerrero, especially when nothing is going the way you imagine it would. "I won't, I promise. I'll call you if there's a change of plans,"
"I'll be here," Jeff says, "I'll talk to you later, then?"
"Yeah, I'll give you a call when I wake up."
When we had hung up with each other, I went up to my bedroom and laid down on my bed. Staring up at the plain white ceiling didn't make me want to fall asleep any more then it bored the hell of me, so I rolled over, the side of my face met Matt's pillow. It smelled just like him. Why is it that when I can't seem to drive something away from me, everything in the world annoys me? I threw the pillow onto the hardwood floor and rolled back over onto my side of the bed.
And I can't go to sleep
'Cause memories haunt my dreams.
And I try to move on, But I keep hearing our song.
I don't know if I can keep living without you.
Every time I shut my eyes, I saw him. In a way, he's exactly what I did and I didn't want to see at the moment, it's complicated. I miss him, but there's so much that I need to think about. I don't even know when he's going to be home, there's only going to be vacation for about three more days. So, like it or not, he has to be home soon.
I just can't get him to go away, even though, I bet, I'm the last thing that he's thinking about right now. There just has to be something I could do to make this better. Deciding that television could be that something, I reach over to my night stand and grab the remote. While I flipped through the channels, I stop at one particular channel. It was one of those music channels in the hundreds and it was playing my favorite love song. I hate this. This is like 'Attack Chantel Week!' or something; with the fighting and then seeing everything I don't want to see, from the scents to the songs, it's all just breaking me down and I really don't know what else there is for me to do about this.
And I'm sorry for pushing you away,
Yes, I am sorry for breaking your heart.
I'm sorry for turning my back when you needed me.
I'm so sorry, baby.
Looking back on everything that has happened within the past few days, I would say that if there was a different way for me to have approached this, it wouldn't have been done without thinking. That brings me to another thing I loved about Matt so much, even though Jeff and I were so alike and we'd do things without thinking or regretting it, Matt was always the one to think things through and takes things, not at a slow pace, but a real steady one.
My eyes begin to close again and I start to drift into the peacefulness of silence. I felt tired anyway, so I might as well try to get some sleep before I really lose my head. I started thinking about all of the other things that didn't have to do with Matt, like motocross with Jeff or having Shelly touchier me, like when she drags me around to go shopping and buy iced coffees.
'Just open your eyes, just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful…'
My cell phone is ringing. And there she goes again… why is it that even thinking about all the trouble we get into when we're around each other makes my cell phone ring? It's her, I know it is, and she's probably calling to drag me into to doing something weird with her and Phil, like she always seems to do. I answer it and even before I get to say 'What's up?' Shelly's talking at a thousand miles a minute.
"If you think that I'm going to let you stay cooped up in your house all day, you are very mistaken Miss. Price!" Shelly exclaims.
"And you're planning to do what?" I ask, Shelly was a friend that I could just talk to. We weren't too close, but she was never too far away when I needed to get away from the world. Kind of like I need to right now.
"Well, Jeff, Phil and I are going to rent a few comedy DVD's and you're coming to join us," I liked that she just wants to see me smile, but comedy? I'm not that into comedy. Some of it's funny, some of it just sucks.
"That's really cool and all, but I think I'm just going to work on that article that's due in two days," Lie. I've been finished with that piece for four days now. I've been working under World Wrestling Entertainment as a journalist for their website, I usually get travel on the road with the superstars and that's basically how I met Matt and Jeff a few years ago.
"I know you're done with that article, AND for your information, I wasn't asking you, I was telling you. Jeff will be by in a few minutes to pick you up for my house, be ready!" Shelly chuckled a bit.
"Shell, I really don't want to do this. I really just want to be left alone for a little while--" I groaned.
"Blah, blah, blah--Chantel, don't make me come over there and get you myself!" She giggled, with this sarcastic tone to her voice.
I really don't want to be alone. I guess, I'd rather want to be out with friends then moping around like it's the end of the world. "Fine, I'll go." I finally let out, there was no winning when it came to Shelly and her weirdness.
As Jeff pulled up my driveway, I met him at the door. "You sure you've got everything? Keys, phone, lights are off, doors are locked?" He made me laugh.
"Everything's shut down, locked, I've got my key and my phone, so there should be no worries." I say with a chuckle, "Are we meeting them at Shelly's?" I ask, "Or Phil's?"
"They're at Shelly's, so lets go before she thinks we're off to rob a bank or something." he smirks with a slight laugh.
I'm alone.
So alone.
And time just keeps passing me by, Baby, when you're gone.
Yes, I'm always passing by your house Just to see if your lights are on.
Baby, please, come back into my life.
I need your love.
I kept telling Jeff on the ride over that I shouldn't have told Matt that I didn't need him, it was a lie and if he could only see how much this was tearing me up, he'd know I was lying too. I never met someone quite like the brunette haired Hardy. He was just unique and different from so many of the other guys that I dated back then, he was sweet and he had a cute sense of humor. It's funny because we're not really that alike at all, but he's everything and then more, to me.
"You don't think he meant it when he said we were totally finished, do you?" I asked Jeff, as he drove down the street.
"He's just had a lot of stress lately, with working and all of the on road travel," Jeff explains, looking from the road to me and then back to the road again.
"I hope that you're right, I really can't stand the whole silent treatment and the distancing too, it's too much right now," I reply.
It's true, with our busy work schedules we've both been pretty moody. There's been less time to spend together and we've spent most of vacation along side friends because we hadn't seen any of them in so long. I just wish that this would end already.
The suspense of waiting for him to come home was really getting to me, I needed to see him. I missed him. It kills me that he's not here, so I wonder how things are for him, does he feel the same or not? I'm not used to being alone anymore. I was about three or four years ago, but since there's been Matt, there's never been a reason to feel alone when I'm with him.
"He'll come around, he's just…well, he's just Matt," Jeff says.
"Yeah, but I bet everything in 'Jeff and Beth land' is just wonderful," I say as I roll my eyes over at my rainbow hair friend.
Matt is a sucker when it comes to emotions, but this time I really did cross the line. Does he know how much it kills me for getting under his skin? I swear, maybe he has some type of tracking device that measures how sorry I am and I just haven't hit the breaking point yet.
Now, I sound retarded, don't I?
And I'm sorry for pushing you away,
Yes, I am sorry for breaking your heart.
I'm sorry for turning my back when you needed me.
I'm so sorry, baby.
I'm not sure of how much more of the silent treatment I can take. I've called him a total of twenty six times and I left four messages, but he hasn't called me back. I really hurt him. We've had fights, but he's never walked out and left for three days. Mostly he'd go into one of his hangout rooms and relax for a few hours, but this time, and I hate to say it but; I screwed up.
"Recently, yes, but there are days when the two of us just have our moments and need some space," he confesses, "Look at it this way, you two have been living together for almost two years, it's normal for you guys to get into each others ways and bump heads sometimes,"
Oh baby, please.
Look, I've been crying every single night.
I don't see the sun, I don't see the stars.
Oh baby, won't you please come back into my life!
Shelly knows I've been in the house for days on end, or she wouldn't be dragging me out against my will to watch comedy. This has to be one of the things she has to randomly do once a month, pick something that would totally annoy me, yet make me feel a bit better.
As we stepped out of the car and into the house, I notice the entire coffee table was filled to its edges with sweets, it was like she was throwing a party or something. "So, what amazing thing did you pick this month?" I said sarcastically.
"Oh, you're going to like this," Shelly answers, "You know that guy who does all of those ventriloquist acts?"
"Yup." I answer, "Please don't tell me you rented one of those?" I groaned. The whole ventriloquist thing kind of creped me out, in a way. Jeff Dunham, the guy behind the voices, was funny and all, but the fact that you never saw his lips move once just freaked me out. Even professionals screw up, but this guy makes it seem simple.
I know it's not my thing at all, but Shelly is trying so hard to please me and it's at least good to know that someone else cares. I sat with them and watched it, laughing at a few of my favorite parts, I'd have to say my favorite act was when he brought out 'Ackmed The Dead Terrorist'
"Knock, knock"
"Whose there?"
"Me, I kill you!"
And even as the DVD played and I watched and watched to my hearts content, Matt still lingered in my mind. I wonder if he's okay? What if something happened to him? Could he be dead in a ditch somewhere?
"Hey guys, is it okay if I go make a phone call?" I asked. Shell looked at me in disappointment, I knew she didn't want Matt to spoil the whole comedy thing, but I just needed to call him, just this last time, to see if everything is alright.
"Go for it." She finally let out, with a soft smile on her face.
Oh, just forgive me.
Look, I know I hurt you real, real bad.
But if you just give me one chance, baby, just one more chance,
I promise I'm gonna do you right this time.
When I reached the front porch, I pulled out my cell phone and dialed his number, yet again. I waited for him to pick up, growing impatient through the ten seconds of waiting, that felt like ten years. And then finally I received his voicemail. Again.
"Hey, this is Matt, leave a message and I'll get back to you later."
"Matt, it's Chantel. I just…I'm sorry. I never meant to tell you that I didn't need you or that I didn't care about you. I've been stress and I'm tired and…I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. We both have been getting down each other throats, so please don't take everything I said to heart, it's not true. I don't hate you, Matthew Moore, if anything in the world, I'm crazy about you. I miss you--"
Beep, beep, beep
Stupid fucking beep cut me off from everything else I wanted to say!
Ugh! I sigh and closed my phone, slipping it back into my pocket and walking back inside. No one said anything when I returned to my spot on the couch. Although, I found it hard to concentrate on the rest of the so called comedy. This day felt like one big eternity and I was just waiting for it to pass, thinking that maybe I'll come home and he'll be there waiting for me. He will, I know he will.
Gimme one more chance.
I'ma do you right this time.
Gimme one more chance.
I'ma do you right this time.
The thought of Matt being there had me overly excited, I couldn't wait to get home. Just to see him and hold him again, would make everything better for me. I can't wait to tell him everything face to face instead of to his voicemail. I am determined to fix everything tonight, because I'm sure he'd want to. It's been days since our fight, so things should have subsided by now.
It was already dark out and the comedy skits finally ended. Thank God. I waited impatiently for Jeff to finally go 'Well, I'm getting tired, I think it's time we get going..' Which, he finally came around to doing almost ten minutes later.. We had said our good nights and goodbyes to both Shelly and Phil, before escaping the comedy madness and safely retreating to Jeff's car.
The lights were off in my house as we pulled up, maybe he came home and went straight to bed? Jeff escorted me to my front door and I invite him in for coffee, but he told me that it was late and Beth was waiting for him at home. I didn't question him, but I smiled and kissed his cheek, thanking him for the drive home.
"Tell Beth I say 'hi'?" I ask.
"Of course, she always loves to hear from you," He chuckles with a small smile. "Night," Jeff says.
"Night, Jeff, drive safe!" I call to him as he walks down the steps and onto the driveway to his car.
When I walked up the stairs, I opened my bedroom door slowly, hoping not to disturb Matt from his slumber, but when I dimmed the lights on, there was no one on our bed. Matt hadn't come home. The sudden excitement I had work up about a half hour ago, went back to the slow touchier I've received for days now. I sat down on Matt's side of the bed, leaning over to grab his pillow off the floor. As I laid down, I looked at the picture that sat on his night table, of the two of us a few months back on his birthday. The tears slowly fell as he stared back at me through the glass and then into the peacefulness of my dream was where I fell afterward.
And I'm sorry for pushing you away,
Yes, I am sorry for breaking your heart.
I'm sorry for turning my back when you needed me.
I'm so sorry, baby.
The next morning, I woke up to something strange, very strange. There was something heavy laid upon my waist and when I looked down to see what it was, I saw an arm. My eyes trailed from the heavy, creamy colored arm, to Matt's tan face and his tangled, curly brown hair. I tried to move without waking him up, but that didn't seem to work too well. He shifted and his grip on me became tighter and then I noticed one thing I didn't see a second ago; Matt had stains down his cheeks, like I he had been crying.
"Chantel…" Matt stirred from his sleep, but when he opened his eyes, they looked blood shot as if this was the first time he had slept in days. "I'm sorry I was away for so long, I got your messages, I just needed some space. Please forgive--"
"No, Matt." I said, "I should be the one asking you to forgive me, I didn't mean it when I said that I could do better or that I hated you and how I wished you would just disappear from the face of the earth."
Matt didn't say a word, he just listened very quietly, "You're the only thing I thought about for the past four days, I missed you and I was wrong for saying things that were so cruel. I'm sorry for making so upset, but I just want you to know now, the only thing I can say is that I'm truly sorry, for everything,"
For making you cry. For breaking your heart.
"Can you forgive me?"
"Chantel," Matt spoke up, "You don't need to tell me how much you love me," he said, "Because I already know that you do," I looked at him like he was going crazy. Was he really saying that? It usually took more then that in movies.
He leaned forward, his lips lightly pressed against mine and the left hand that had laid across my stomach, was now caressing the right side of my face. Matt broke away from me slowly, his bloodshot eyes stared into mine, "I love you, I never meant to break your heart."
At this point it seemed like everything that was falling into pieces was now falling into place. The sun was shining, symbolizing the start of a better day, and my boyfriend was back where I hoped he would be, here in my arms and with me.
Exactly where he should have been from the start.