Prison Bitch
Summary: Mandy always knew her only options in life were getting pregnant or getting arrested. She never knew that when she finally did get arrested she'd meet the woman of her dreams. Orange Is the New Black AU (with only a little bit of crossover)
Disclaimer: I don't own Shameless.
I'm so happy I came up with this. Haha I hadn't planned on writing anything for this day either, but a sudden burst of inspiration hit me and here we are. Amazing. I'm really proud of this, so I really hope you all like it!
Mandy always knew she'd end up in jail eventually. All the Milkoviches did at some point in their lives. She wasn't any different than the other losers in her family, no matter how hard she tried. Back when she dated Lip Gallagher, she used to dream of a future outside of the South Side. Then he cheated on her with Karen Jackson so she ran over that fucking bitch with a car. If only some asshole cop hadn't caught her in the act, she never would've ended up in this mess. Anyway, she figured it served her right for thinking that some boy would be the answer to all her problems.
The day she arrived in jail, a beautiful, severe-looking woman with long, wavy brown hair was the first person who managed to get her to talk. The woman walked right up to her and looked her up and down carefully, sizing her up.
Mandy scowled back at her. "The fuck are you lookin' at?" she asked gruffly to hide her self-consciousness.
"What is your name?" the woman asked roughly in a thick Russian accent.
"Mandy Milkovich," Mandy grunted back, eyeing her carefully. The woman grinned at her cold response and handed her a toothbrush.
"I give you gift," she explained when Mandy looked at her questioningly. "This place not so nice when first arrive."
Mandy nodded. "Thanks," she muttered. She walked over to her bunk and hid the new toothbrush from any potential thieves. "What's your name?"
"My name is Svetlana M-" Before Svetlana could finish speaking, the loud, booming voice of a man echoed throughout the halls.
"You ladies better scoot your asses down to where you need to be. I will write you all a shot if I have to!" Mandy looked out into the hallway and saw a man in uniform staring back at her. The first thing she noticed about him was his mustache, and somehow she could tell right away that he was a creep.
The man with the mustache wiggled his eyebrows at her and licked his lips before walking away. Svetlana scoffed in disgust.
"Who the fuck is that asshole?" Mandy asked.
"That man we call Pornstache," Svetlana said, her face wrinkling in disgust. "You not piss him off and you be fine."
"Great," Mandy groaned sarcastically. "Any other things I need to know?"
"Lesbian activity not allowed," Svetlana said with a smirk. "At least they say so. We all do anyway."
Mandy's face wrinkled in disgust. "I ain't gonna go all dyke if that's what you mean," she barked.
Svetlana smirked. "That they always say. We all do anyway."
"Whatever you wanna believe, Lana," Mandy replied with a grin.
"Do not call me this," Svetlana shot back with a grin of her own.
Mandy was surprised when she got yogurt with her food the next day. It wasn't like the shitty cafeteria food they always got. It was genuine, dairy, fruit-flavored yogurt.
"Uh… thanks," she said to the girl with short hair who handed her the lunch tray, looking both grateful and confused.
"Don't thank me," the girl responded. She motioned over to where Svetlana was sitting. Svetlana returned their gaze with an immodest smirk, leaning back in her chair.
Mandy couldn't help her own small smile that twitched onto her face in response. Against her better judgment telling her to keep to herself, she walked up to the Russian girl's table and sat down.
"You keep giving me gifts," Mandy said warily. "What do I gotta do to earn this, lick your pussy?"
"No charge," Svetlana replied, amused by Mandy's reaction. "I tell Red you my friend."
"Red?" Mandy asked.
"She is chef. Also Russian. We very good friends," Svetlana explained. "You are new, so you also need make friend, I think."
Mandy looked around the cafeteria guardedly. "You're saying I gotta make friends in order to make it in here?"
"Yes," Svetlana said simply. "Friend protects you."
Mandy looked down at the yogurt and then back up at Svetlana. "Well, then. I guess this makes us friends, Lana."
Svetlana did not correct her this time.
"How'd you get stuck in here anyway?" Mandy asked Svetlana one day while they worked together in the kitchen.
"Prostitution," Svetlana said with a little smile. "And also, I smash the head of cop with hammer."
Mandy's eyes widened in amazement. "You seriously killed a cop?!"
Svetlana nodded. "Yes," she replied bluntly. "He hurt my girlfriend and did not pay for hand job, so I kill him."
"Girlfriend?" Mandy asked. "You were munching rugs even before you came to this place?"
"Rugs?" Svetlana asked, tilting her head quizzically and looking up from the soup she was stirring.
Mandy smirked. "Eating pussy," she clarified. Svetlana chuckled at the joke.
"Ah, yes," she said, "after I come to America I free, so I try both pussy and dick."
"So you like both?" Mandy asked curiously. "You're not a lesbian?"
"Maybe yes. Maybe no," Svetlana said with a shrug. "Word such as 'lesbian' not so important, I think."
Mandy was amazed. She'd never really thought about it before.
"Why did you come this place?" Svetlana asked Mandy quietly after lights out. "You ask me, but I did not ask you." It was such a random question, and Mandy could've pretended that she was asleep, but she didn't.
"Some bitch fucked my boyfriend so I ran her over with my car," she whispered into the darkness, sighing heavily. "She's a vegetable now, so I know she didn't snitch on me, but I still managed to get caught anyway."
Svetlana looked at her thoughtfully. "What you do to boyfriend?"
Mandy's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Huh?"
"Boyfriend also cheat. What you do to him?" Svetlana asked again, turning over in bed to watch Mandy curiously.
"I… didn't do anything," Mandy replied, as if it was obvious. "It was that bitch's fault. You should've seen her hanging all over him, trying to piss me off."
"Did she tie him and make him do sex with her?" Svetlana asked.
"Well, no, but…"
"He cheat on you. He the one who deserve car," Svetlana stated simply.
Mandy didn't say anything back to that. She frowned, thinking back to her relationship with Lip. She used to think that he was so perfect. Now she wasn't so sure.
"My girlfriend also cheat when I come here," Svetlana continued. "I understand your feeling."
"Well, that sucks," Mandy sighed. "But at least you've got options in here, right?"
"This is true," Svetlana agreed with a chuckle. "But most girls I only fuck. Not many I like so much as you."
Mandy smiled a little. "You sayin' you like me?" she asked teasingly.
"Yes," Svetlana replied. "If you said so, I make you girlfriend." Honestly, Mandy should've expected such a blunt answer.
As much as Mandy was starting to like Svetlana back, she wasn't ready to say it aloud just yet. They both fell asleep, more than comfortable leaving things the way they were for the moment.
A couple days later, Mandy overheard a conversation between Svetlana and some girl named Nicky Nichols. She pretended not to notice their conversation and kept shoveling food onto trays for people to eat.
"Boo and I got this bet going to see who can fuck the most girls," Nicky said animatedly, wiggling her eyebrows. "You wanna contribute to my cause?"
Svetlana just shook her head. "This time no, I think," she replied.
Nicky looked taken aback. "Seriously? Why the hell not? You're always down for a fuck."
"Right now there is special girl," Svetlana explained in a matter-of-fact tone. "I wait for her."
"Seriously?" Nicky laughed. "Wow, this is new! Who is it?"
Svetlana shook her head. "Now she is not ready. I do not say."
"Whoever she is, she's a lucky lady," Nicky teased. "If she doesn't like you back, then she's an idiot."
Mandy's eyes flickered down to the floor. She scowled so that people didn't notice she was blushing.
Mandy grabbed Svetlana by the hand and led her through the empty hallways impatiently.
Svetlana noticed her excitement and couldn't help but smile. "Where do you take me?" she asked curiously.
Mandy grinned. "You'll see."
Everyone had cleared out of the hallways in favor of a big party going on for one of the inmates that was getting released soon. There was barely a person in sight, and as long as it was just the two of them, Mandy was going to make the most of it. She led Svetlana to their shared living area, pleased to see that, even in that room, there wasn't a single person nearby.
"I do not understand," Svetlana informed her patiently. Even though she had no idea what was going on, from the look on Mandy's face, she knew that it was something good.
Mandy spared one last glance across her shoulder and finally let out a sigh of relief. She needed to stop being a pussy and just do it already: the one thing she hadn't been able to stop thinking about since she got to that place.
She turned toward Svetlana, and without any more warning, planted a soft kiss against her lips.
Svetlana immediately wrapped her hand around the back of Mandy's neck and pulled her in closer. Their bodies moved in perfect sync with each other as they breathed and pressed up against each other. Svetlana hummed against her lips and held her tightly. Every little thing the Russian girl did took Mandy's breath away. It was everything she'd imagined and more.
When Mandy pulled back, lightheaded and panting for breath, she looked down at the ground to hide her embarrassment. They both thought the same thing in that moment: the kiss had been well worth the wait.
"I do not understand," Svetlana said again, smiling wide.
"It means I like you too, you stupid bitch," Mandy laughed, pushing her shoulder. Svetlana grinned and pushed her right back until they both tumbled down onto Mandy's bunk.
Svetlana sighed and looked down at Mandy dreamily. She leaned down for another kiss and then another. She couldn't get enough.
They spent the rest of the afternoon kissing and talking. All the time they had left being locked up no longer seemed like it would be so lonely.