Catching Tear Drops In My Hand
Kenny hopped off the bus, and smiled as he ran to catch up with Kyle. He held his backpack to his chest protectively as he argued with Cartman. Stan came up behind Kenny and sighed. They both exchanged a gloomy look. The arguing never stopped. No matter what. Kyle and Cartman could be rainbows and butterflies one moment, and at insanity's edge the next. The arguments never were really about anything much. Kyle was still going out with Rebecca, and Cartman always picked on him for dating the home schooled girl. Or some other annoyance that he found with Rebecca. Finally, sick of the arguing, Kenny grabbed Stan by the arm, and they both left to enter school through another door. They didn't even want to speak. They had abused the subject of how much they hated Cartman, so much, that it was a dead subject. No one really could get enough of talking about how much they hated him, though.
"One day, Stan, I'm going to leave this town, and never look back." Kenny said bitterly as he headed to their locker.
Stan felt a wave of nausea hit him as he pictured his life without Kenny. Kenny had always been his best friend. Kyle had been there, but Kyle had it all. Good grades, a girlfriend, a place in the grown up world as, the smart Broflovski kid. He seemed to grow apart from Stan as the years went by. The boyish quality of their friendship started to fall out at about thirteen. Now, in high school, Stan and Kyle only talked in class, at lunch, and at dances, or games if Stan and/or Kyle went to them at the same time. But other than that, they didn't call each other on the phone, they didn't text, or email. They didn't even have any classes together. Cartman and Kyle, though, that was by force. Because Cartman was too afraid to pick on Garry, he chose to rip on Kyle all the time. This is why, Kenny and Stan had become even closer over the years. When Stan got drunk for the very first time, He came to Kenny. In fact, as Kenny and Stan walked to first period, Stan started thinking about the flash back. He let the vivid memories fill his head as he carried himself to class.
It had been a party at Clyde's, and they had been serving all kinds of alcoholic beverages. Token had given Stan a lot of Jack Daniels. He had been surprisingly excited to drink it, as he was really depressed that day. He felt worse with every drink, but he wanted to feel that pain. It made him feel alive, and human. He regretted it as soon as the party was over. He had to go back home. He had to go and stay at his house for the night. But he couldn't. This was his first hang over. His first drunk as fuck experience. So, he went to the only person he thought of off the top of his head. He found himself at Kenny's house, and knocking on his door. The door opened in a couple seconds, and Kevin poked his head out.
"Oh fuck." He muttered as he saw Stan. "Come on in, Marsh. Before your mom and dad drive by and see you like that." He muttered as he opened the door. "Mom and dad won't mind. They're all in the living room watching a movie." Kevin said as he led Stan upstairs. "Kenny, your raven friend is here." Kevin said as he opened Kenny's door. Kenny had been lying on his bed, looking like he was about to fall asleep.
"Why didn't you go to the party?" Kevin asked confused.
"I hate Clyde." Kenny lied. It was really, (Stan found out later.), because Kenny wanted to stay home and play a new video game that he had gotten from his mom. He hadn't wanted to say, because rumor had it at that time, that Kenny was suffering from PSP addiction.
"Where did you come from?" Kenny asked as he looked at Stan. "Fuckin' A!" he shouted as he registered the boy's expression. "Stan, you're plastered." He gasped as he came and pulled Stan into his room.
"Take care of him." Kevin said as he stared at the ground. "I remember my first drink." He said as he walked away. "Karen! Come pick up your dirty rain coat!" he yelled as he jogged down the stairs.
"What happened to you?" Kenny asked as he gazed at Stan and steered him into a seat.
"I dunno." Stan mumbled as he sat down. "I got to talkin' with that Token kid." He said as he sighed. "Kenny, I am really depressed." He said as tears rolled down his face.
"Stan, it's okay." Kenny said as he wiped wine off of Stan's shirt. He realized that Stan was becoming Maudlin.
Stan wrapped his arms around the blond as he broke down. "I'm getting older, Ken…," he sobbed as he hiccupped.
"Stanley, calm down, or my parent's will think I'm making you cry." Kenny said as he supported Stan in his arms.
"But I'm a loser!" sobbed Stan. "Kyle doesn't even want me anymore. He isn't my best friend." He gasped.
"Stanley, stop crying." Kenny said softly as he tried to stop the boy from getting louder. "I still care about you, and I'm always going to be your best friend. Now, lay down and go to sleep." He said as he tried to get Stan to lay down.
"To hell with Broflovski!" Stan sobbed really loud as he punched a hole through the wall beside Kenny's bed. "I hate you, Kyle!" he sobbed as he grabbed Kenny's math book and threw it at the opposite wall.
"Stanley, for God's sake!" Kenny said as Stan broke down again. "Calm down, dude!" Kenny gasped as Stan got up.
"I'm leaving." He said bitterly as he stumbled to the door. "I'm gonna go kill myself." He said in between hiccups. "No one gives a fuck! Life is just a shit hole anyway! One big giant toilet." He shouted as he tried to get to the door.
"Stan sit the fuck down." Kenny said as he grabbed Stan around the waist.
"That feels good." Stan said as he quieted down. "Kenny, I love you." He sobbed as he fell on Kenny who was shorter than him by a head.
"I love you, too, Stan. Come on, let's get you to bed." He said as he tried to walk. "Uh, Stan? You're crushing me, and we're going to fall." He said as he tried to balance himself and Stan properly.
"I can sleep here?" Stan asked as he kissed the top of Kenny's head. "You're so sweet, Kenny! You're a true angel." He said softly. "I can't thank you enough." He said smiling weakly at Kenny.
Stan broke into a ballad about two long lost friends who find themselves again after twenty years at sea. Kenny couldn't help but sing along. At the end of the song, Stan buried his head in Kenny's shoulder, and the two boys finally crashed to the floor under Stan's weight.
"I love you, Kenny!" Stan sobbed. "I hope you never change." He said. He passed out in Kenny's arms.
"Fuck. He crashed my whole Friday night." Kenny muttered as he stared at the ground.
"I am talking to you, Stan the man." Kenny said as he pulled on Stan's shirt. It made Stan's heart stop whenever Kenny called him that. He was the man. Soon, he hoped, he would be someone's man. Hopefully not Wendy's, again. She was a bitch.
"What?" asked Stan as he looked up and found himself already in first class.
"I asked you if you were going to go to the four twenty party that is going to be held at Starks pond?" he asked in a whisper.
"Yeah, maybe." Stan said as he stared blankly at Kenny. "I really wanted to go, but sometimes, I think maybe I'm not the right type for that." He said as he yawned. "I'm not social since things changed, you know?" he asked sighing.
"I know. You've become a lot more drab." Kenny said bitterly. "I don't think I can handle another one of your drunken sob sessions." He said smiling kindly at Stan.
"Kenny, maybe weed and alcohol aren't for me." Stan said grinning. "Neither is anything happy, apparently." Kenny said grinning.
"I can't wait to graduate." Kenny muttered. "I'll finally be gone from here."
"Yes, good for you." Stan said as he took out his book.
Kenny was feeling a little angry. He kept hinting to Stan that he was going to leave, and Stan never reacted. He had never once told Kenny to stay, or asked Kenny if he could go with him. He hadn't. It was just, Kenny wanted so much to know if he really loved him that way. Stan had said it a million times during a drunken spell, but Kenny wanted to hear it from the teen sober. He felt like it would never happen. Ever.
"Your stomach just growled." Cartman said in second period as the class started.
"No, it's fine." Kenny said feeling the pang of hunger. The boy's stomach growled again.
"Damn, Ken." Stan said laughing, causing Kenny to laugh too. "He's right. You're starving." Stan said grinning.
"Here. I have the perfect snack." Cartman said as he handed him a giant rice crispy treat.
"Oh, shit. I really don't want that." Kenny said pushing it away.
"My mom made them." Cartman said as Kenny snatched it back.
"I'll take that!" He said as he bit into the treat. It was so good. He ate through half of it, and felt really good.
"I helped her." Cartman said smiling at Kenny.
"I gotta go throw up." Kenny said as he stood up scared.
"I didn't poison it." Cartman said as he grinned evilly at Kenny.
"I don't want it to reach my blood stream and find out." Kenny said as he stood up again.
"Sit down, Mr. McCormick." The instructor said as she came to the front of the class room. Kenny groaned as he sat down.
Halfway through the class, Kenny was looking mesmerized at the desk. It was breathing. The walls around him were breathing, too. He sighed content as he lost himself in the patterns of Stan's eyes. They seemed to shift, and move in odd ways. Had they always done that?
"Stan?" Kenny asked in a whisper. "I think I'm losing my mind." He moaned.
"Kenny!" said the teacher slapping a ruler in front of Kenny on his desk.
"Not so loud, Miss Martin." Kenny whispered as he looked at her pretty hair. It was alive. The colors were alive with such pretty lights.
"Kenny, what the hell is your problem?" Stan gasped as he looked at the different expressions on Kenny's face.
"Kenny, are you going to answer me?" Stan whispered.
"Young man, that is the third time I have walked right past you, and you still haven't started on your test!" the instructor said as she rapped Kenny on the head with the ruler.
"Don't do that!" Kenny gasped as he looked panicked at her. "I have a very small head." He gasped.
"Kenny, then get to work." The lady said bitterly. "If I come around one more time, and you're still not started, I am going to send you to the principal's office." She said bitterly.
"Stanley, I need to talk to you." Kenny shouted loudly as he felt his hands elongate.
"Kenny! I am serious young man, get to work."
"Stanley, I think Cartman poisoned my food!" he shouted as he started to sweat.
"Eric, what is Kenny talking about?" the instructor asked as she came over to them. "I want all three of you to step out to the hall. No, never mind. I can't leave my class. I want you three to go to the principal's office." She said as she motioned for them to stand up.
Kenny had trouble getting to his feet, so Stan grabbed him, and helped him to the door. The class was talking really loudly, and Kenny thought he saw snakes in the back of the class room. But no. It wasn't. He needed to get himself together.
"I'm not going with you fags." Cartman said as he left. "I'm going to the bathroom. I'm not going to go back to math class, either." He said as he left.
"Let's go get some air, Kenny." Stan said as he led Kenny outside.
"Stanley, the grass is so beautiful." Kenny said softly. "It's like, hair growing on the ground." He sighed.
"Kenny, you have got to get yourself together." Stan said as he led Kenny to his car.
Kenny leaned over and threw up on the grass. He started to sweat. He didn't know why he felt this way.
"Stan, I think Cartman gave me something really bad!" Kenny started to cry.
"Kenny, what's wrong?" Stan gasped as he led Kenny to the hood of his car.
"My body is too tight!" Kenny sobbed as he scratched at his skin. "I can't fit into my skin!" he sobbed. "It's suffocating me!" he moaned. "I can't take it!" he shrieked.
"Kenny, stay right here." Stan gasped as he saw Kenny sweating. "I'm going to go get the nurse." He gasped as he ran off.
Stan regretted running off instantly. When he came back, Kenny had a knife in his hands and was cutting away at the flesh on his arms. He was crying as he cut. Blood was drenching his hands.
"Kenny nooooooooo!" Stan shouted along with the nurse as they broke into a run after him.
It took both of them a while to restrain Kenny and his blade. But they managed to. Blood was coming out of all the cuts on the boy's body that he had made.
"Kenny believes that the rice crispy treat that he ate contained LSD!" Stan said as he and the nurse carried Kenny back to the hospital.
"I think so too, Stan." Nurse Gallem gasped as she and Stan laid him down on a cot.
She grabbed a first aid kit, and gave it to Stan. Stan worked on patching Kenny up for a while. He had to have stitches on a slash he had made on his left cheek.
"Can I stay with him?" he asked as he handed the nurse the first aid kit back.
"Yes. I'll excuse you from the rest of your classes." She muttered.
Just as he was sitting down beside Kenny, the door opened, and Craig, the principle, and Tweek came in. But Tweek wasn't walking. He was in Craig's arms. Craig looked visibly shaken as he carried Tweek to a cot. Stan was too focused on Kenny to hear what they were saying until he heard Cartman's name. That's when he looked up, and saw what horrible shape Tweek was in.
"How long has Kenny been out?" Craig asked as he started working on Tweek's wounds.
Stan answered the question with little emotion. He felt like his whole world had been torn apart.
He listened without listening as his class mate made threats against Cartman.
Kenny shifted beside Stan, and Stan gasped. He looked down at Kenny, and tried not to cry.
"Kenny!" he said bitterly. "How are you?"
"I'm fine." Kenny lied. He looked like he was going to throw up. Stan watched as Kenny tried to flick bugs off of him.
"Kenny, stay with me. The bugs are not real." He gasped.
"I know." Kenny said as he sank back into his cot. "I know they aren't."
Craig and Stan decided that it wouldn't be very wise to let Kenny and Tweek stay in school for the rest of the day. Stan carried Kenny out of the school, and Craig had Tweek. Stan got to his house fifteen minutes later.
He came out of the car, and picked up Kenny in his arms. He slammed the door shut with his foot as he walked off to the house. He banged on the door, hoping someone was home. The door opened, and Shelly peaked out.
"Holy shit, turd! What happened to him!" she cried out as she let Stan in. "Mom! Stan destroyed his blond friend!" she yelled at the top of her lungs.
"Shut up, Shelly. He's asleep." Stan said bitterly as he tried to go upstairs.
"Oh my God, Stanley, what the hell happened!?" Sharon asked as she saw the boy in Stanley's arms.
"Mom, please, don't wake him up!" Stanley whispered as he stood there terrified. "It takes him a long time to go to sleep, and he's having a bad trip."
Stan went to put Kenny to bed, and came down to the kitchen. He explained to his mom and sister how Kenny had come to be in that state. He told his mom that Cartman had also done the same to the Tweek boy as well. Everyone agreed that Cartman was going to get in serious trouble.
When he came back into his room, he turned on the light. He spotted Kenny, sitting up. He was trying to take his bandages off. He went over to the blond boy, and held his hands.
"Kenny, you can't take those off." He whispered. "You can't take those off." He said as he started to tremble.
"But they're crawling with larva." Kenny moaned as he started to cry. "Stan, I'm going insane." He gasped. "I need to take off the bandages." He moaned.
"Kenny, they aren't real. Cartman gave you drugs. You said it yourself. They aren't real." He said as he pulled Kenny into his arms. He sighed as a tear fell on the top of Ken's head.
"Stan, are you crying?" Kenny asked as he looked up at his friend.
"Yes!" Stan sobbed. "I don't want anything to hurt you, and now look what Cartman's done to you?" he sobbed.
"Your tears…, they're shaped like diamonds." Kenny whispered as he placed his hand below Stan's face, letting a tear fall into it. He started singing. "Cartman made me want to run! I know why, you wouldn't come. LSD just isn't fun. I don't know why, I need a gun. Don't know why, I need a gun! When I saw the break of day, I wished that I could fly away…!" Stan didn't stop him. He just wrapped his arms around the blond and sang with him. "Instead of kneeling in the sand," they both sang. "Catching tear drops, inn my hand." Kenny sang as he caught a tear that Stan watched fall from his own eyes.
Kenny launched into a parody of his own. "Catching Stan's tear drops in my hand." He sang. "My face, is drenched in iodine!" he sang. "But Stan's been on my mind, forever." He sang sadly. "So if Stanley leaves with me, I will die in ecstasy. I won't be, a bag of bones. Driving down, the road alone." They both sang the new lyrics to the song. But Kenny added more. "Cartman had to make me run." Kenny sang. "And I know why, you wouldn't come." He started to cry again as he sang. "I felt as empty as a drum. But Stanley is my shining sun. Oh, Stanley is my shining sun. Oh, Stanley! Is my shining sun." he sobbed as he collapsed into the raven's arms.
"Kenny," Stan sobbed. "I love you to!" he sobbed as he kissed Kenny's cheek.
"And the family is going to love this." Shelly said laughing hysterically. "Because it's about to become a home movie!" she yelled.
Stan didn't care. He held Kenny, and leaned down kissing his chapped lips. He smiled. "I love you, too, Ken." He whispered softly. "I don't want you to get hurt anymore. I want you getting better. I'll make the bad trip stop." He muttered softly. "I just don't know how." He muttered.
For the next week in a half, Kenny and Stan were ridiculed by the whole Marsh family who just could not get enough of the tape. They didn't care. That song, and tears were changed forever.
"One of the good things that came out of Cartman lacing my food with LSD." Kenny said as Sharon laughed hysterically at her two boys on the screen.
"Forget the home movies!" Shelly shrieked pounding the arm chair's arm as she laughed. "This is going on the internet!"
"pay per view!" Randy suggested as he squeezed Kenny's knee grinning at him.
"The sad thing is," Kenny said two weeks later as he lay in Stan's arms relaxing. "I can't see all those cool shapes like I could when I was on the shit." He said softly. "Now tears just look like tears." He muttered.
"I don't care. I don't want you to take that stuff anymore." Stan muttered softly. "I still have nightmares of you doing bad things to yourself." He muttered as he felt sick.
"I have a surprise for you." Kenny said smiling. "Let's go have a go at Shelly's piano." He requested as he stood out of Stan's arms.
Two minutes later, Stan and Kenny were sitting on the piano bench, and Kenny was playing the real Nora Jones song as he fit his own lyrics into the song. The song, and tears were so truly changed forever. Even more so now that Stan new that Kenny knew how to play that song on the piano.