A Letter of Love
Sakura sat at her desk staring at the pencil and paper in front of her. A pain filled her heart from the day's unveiling. She and Syaoran were dating now, and both seemed happy.
But last night, Syaoran had admitted something shocking to Sakura. The whole scene replayed over and over again in her head.
Sakura
laid her head on Syaoran's shoulder after another wonderful date together. She sighed in happy bliss. "I love you." She whispered.
Syaoran
shifted uncomfortably. "Do you?"
Sakura
sat up and frowned. "Nani?"
"Do you
love me?" He asked again.
Sakura's
frown deepened. "Of course. Why do you ask? Are you in doubt?"
Syaoran
sighed and looked down at the ground. "I know I love you, but I'm not sure you love me as much."
So that was it. Sakura had given an excuse, saying she was tired, so he would take her home where she could hide her pain and her tears. She loved him, but how could she prove it?
That was what had brought her here now, in front of a piece of paper and pencil. She would write him a letter, saying how much she loved him. If he didn't believe her then…she was out of ideas and out of luck.
She picked up the pencil carefully, and placed it at the top of the page. With a deep breath she started to write…
To my dearest Syaoran,
The time has come to prove my love for you. I know I can never pay all of your fears worries to rest, but by Kami-sama as my witness I will try.
Having never lover before, the feeling I initially felt for you was surprising. The words that were passed between us, the feelings we confessed intrigued and confused me.
With card capturing and school, I never thought I could love and be loved. But when you came into my life, something inside of me changed. I was unconsciously falling in love with you.
To me, you were always kind and gentle, protecting me from harm, and risking your life to save mine. Day by day I thought of you more and more. I looked forward to seeing you and being able to talk with you again. It could be the end of the world and if you were by my side, I could dare less.
When I'm around you, I feel complete and happy. I take comfort in knowing you will always be there for me.
I know in the past I have been moving kind of fast, for both of us. You are new at this too, and I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I believe I did what I did because I want more, want to feel more. These new feelings and sensations I'm experiencing are so good, I don't want it to stop.
When I think if you, I daydream of us together. When I see a couple kissing or walking down the street, I imagine us. When we talk on the phone, my hands dampen from nervousness, making it harder to hold on to the phone. When we talk or hold hands, my heart beats rapidly in my chest, humming in my ears, and increases my breathing. When we talk, I laugh and giggle at things you say, simply because it's you.
To say I love you, wouldn't even be scratching the surface. If you never met me, I would find you. If you decided to leave me, I would follow you. Travel by land, and I would learn to run. Travel by sea, and I would learn to swim. Travel by air, and I would grow wings to follow you into the heavens. If you were to die and go to hell, I would sell my soul. If the gods said it was your time, I would beg for your soul to be returned to me. If you had to leave me, I would wait a hundred years for your return.
I see no other man as great as you. No model on Earth as cute as you. The fairest child could not exceed your innocence. My family could disown me, my friends renounce me, and the worlds oppress me and I would still love you.
You can call me names and treat me wrong and I would still love you.
Venus, Aphrodite, nor Kami-sama know not the love, nor the pain I feel for you. My heart aches when we are apart. My arms yearn to wrap around you. My lips desire to touch yours in a sweet, and gentle kiss. My whole body, mind, and soul are yours.
So if you ask me if I love you, I must say no, because what I feel for you, humankind has no name. The sun, the moon, the earth, and the galaxy could combine, and my entity, fueled by my feelings for you, could out power and destroy them all.
As I end this letter, with a shaky wet hand, I say this now and true, so never forget. If you decide I am not enough, and what I feel is not that great, no other man will have my heart, and I will never love again.
Since what I feel has no name, I will settle with love. Aishiteru, Syaoran-kun. I now bid you a due.
Always with love,
Kinomoto Sakura