AN: So, I've been working on this story on and off again for over a year, but I've finally had enough and am hoping that finally posting it will give me the motivation to do it some good. I have big plans for this one, but I am more than open to constructive criticism and valuable ideas.

I'm saying this once only: This story is not for the faint of heart. There are some serious adult themes involved, namely SPOILERS!: substance use and abuse, strong language, scenes of a sexual nature (both explicit and implied), and character death. If you don't feel that you can stomach a story with these themes, please hit the back button and find a more appropriate story for your tastes.

Also, I am looking for a beta for this and future stories. Take a look at my profile and drop me a line if you're interested.

And finally, the disclaimer. I do not own any part of the Harry Potter franchise. I am merely borrowing parts for the sake of fanfiction.

Perhaps black formal robes were not such a good idea, but the ceremony remained the same over the centuries. Graduates of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry sat in their chairs on the stage overlooking the Black Lake, facing their loved ones on this most important of days. Said graduates wore matching black formal robes adorned with a either a red, yellow, blue, or green sash. The Head Boy and Girl wore a silver cord around their necks as well as they sat nearest the Headmistress' podium. The blazing sun would do nothing to stop such a revered tradition, but it certainly got many questioning the wiseness of wearing such a thing when the weather was so warm.

Hermione Granger, ecstatic as she was, could be included in that many. However, nothing could detract from her happiness as she received her diploma from the Headmistress. Her silver cord shone in the light as her eyes landed on the two boys – men – sitting only a few metres away, her smile as wide as her face would allow. They cheered and hollered and waved, and generally made fools of themselves. Normally, such behaviour would have been embarrassing, but today was not a normal day. Today was the day where Hermione Granger graduated (with honours) from Hogwarts, and the day where her best friends did not.

It wasn't a surprise to the world when Hermione returned to Hogwarts after the war ended. Anyone who had ever met her knew that she took her education very seriously, even from an early age. It wasn't much of a surprise, either, when Ron Weasley didn't return to the castle. His attitude on schooling was almost the opposite of Hermione's, and after being offered a position on the Chudley Cannons, he decided that Hogwarts was behind him. The surprise was when Harry Potter, the Man-Who-Won, also decided not to return to his first true home. It was common knowledge around the Wizarding World that the famed warlock wanted to become an Auror, and a complete education was required for such a career. However, after several recommendations from very important people, he was granted early admission to the Auror Academy, provided he got the required NEWTs. He wore himself thin between his training and Hermione's tutoring, but he received full marks; only his tutor got better scores.

The ceremony passed in a blur for the usually attentive Head Girl. Several people gave speeches, but Hermione couldn't find herself to care what the Minister of Magic had to say, even if Kingsley was a friend. She registered when Headmistress McGonagall called her name in that same stern voice as when she was Sorted. The brunette rose and shook her mentor's hand as she was handed her diploma, and the elder woman gave her a rare smile. Later on, she would admit to not remembering much after that until Headmistress McGonagall's voice rang out to conclude the ceremony.

"...and so, I would like to formally introduce Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry's graduating class of nineteen-hundred-ninety-nine." The roar of the crowd was deafening as the graduates tossed their caps in the air and rejoiced. The now former students rushed offstage to meet with their friends and relatives, and Hermione soon found herself in the arms of her two closest friends.

"Oh, Hermione, we missed you!" Ron said over the din, only to get a smack in the head. "Oi, what was that for?"

"You bolt, we met up two weeks ago in Hogsmeade! And if you had come back to school like anyone with half a brain, we never would have had to have been separated in the first place," Hermione said. "Oh, and no 'congratulations, Hermione, on being the only one with enough sense to graduate'?"

"Give him some credit, Mione. He took a mean Bludger to the head during his last training session. And just because some of us didn't graduate doesn't mean that we have half a brain. Some of us got our NEWTs anyways," Harry said smugly as Ron rubbed his head. Hermione laughed.

"Don't give me that, Potter. I was your tutor. Where's Ginny? I haven't had the chance to talk to her yet." Three sets of eyes scanned the masses as the petite redhead in question snuck up on them from behind and gave the other girl a hug.

"Congrats, Hermione. Isn't this so exciting?" she said, literally bouncing with joy as she hugged her brother and kissed Harry.

"It is. Congratulations to you, too. Ron, don't you have something to say to your sister?" the muggle-born said with a sing-song voice. He blushed and congratulated her as the group of friends let out a long laugh. The four of them worked their way through the crowd in search of the other Weasleys, occasionally stopping to receive the well-wishes of people they, for the most part, didn't know. The moment the Weasley matriarch spotted them, she gave them bone-crushing hugs in her excitement.

"Oh, congratulations girls! I am so proud of the both of you! Hermione, I'm sure your parents would be, too, if they were here." Hermione nodded, her eyes watering at the thought of the parents she never rescued, living without a care in Australia. She wiped her tears from her eyes and grinned, acting as if it hadn't bothered her. "You're coming to dinner on Sunday. All of you." It wasn't a question.

"Oh, course, Mrs Weasley. Wouldn't miss it," Harry said. "Mr Weasley, happy to see you again." Everyone started their own conversations as they exited the grounds, and Molly began crying as the realization that her babies were all grown up hit her, and the eldest Weasleys departed, leaving only the three youngest redheads in addition to Harry and Hermione (George had insisted on needing a night out and decided to tag along).

"Well, are we just going to stand here or are you going to tell us where the party's at?"

The party at the Three Broomsticks was fantastic. While Hermione didn't drink and Harry's strongest drink was butterbeer, the Weasleys got positively smashed. The Golden Trio left around two am when Ron finally blacked out. A difficult quarter-hour later, and Ron was finally away in his bed. Since the end of the war, the three friends lived together at 12 Grimmauld Place, though Hermione's room was vacant since she had quarters at the castle. In addition, she did nothing to hide her displeasure at the state of her drunken friend's bedroom.

"How could it have gotten so messy?" she ranted in hushed tones as they made their way away from the bed. "As unhappy as I am with unpaid labour, doesn't Kreacher clean the bedrooms?"

"I may have told him to only clean Ron's room when he's away. It's easier that way, for everybody. But I didn't know it gets this bad. I've got to reward Kreacher soon," Harry said as he scratched his head. Hermione let out a squeak as she slipped on a small bottle, and Harry's Seeker reflexes allowed him to catch her in his arms before she fell.

Hermione couldn't help but to get lost in his eyes; it was always a personal weakness that she refused to regret. He wasn't as hard to get as many thought, but it took years of practice to get to the level where he was like a book for the reading. Yet, she had not a clue as to his feelings. As she was held in his arms, his gaze searching her, she felt more safe than anywhere else.

Harry loved having Hermione in his arms. It was his way of knowing she was safe, protected. But he was drawn to her eyes. The chocolate orbs were always so filled with emotion; figuring out how she was feeling was easy and yet extremely difficult at the same time, and he felt accomplished that he was the only one who could know her like that. There were traces of surprise in her eyes, but some other emotion – one that he never encountered before – overpowered it.

She bit her lip, a cute little habit she developed over the years, and Harry acted without a thought. He kissed her, and was surprised to find her react positively. She grabbed onto his shirt and he pulled her closer as they carefully backed against a wall – their embrace now a full-out snog. Harry had one hand in her hair, another on her hip while Hermione worked at the buttons on his shirt. A loud snore brought them back to reality.

They snogged.

In Ron's bedroom.

While Ron was asleep.

And Harry had a girlfriend.

Hermione sidestepped out of the way and backed towards the door, a blush high on her cheeks. She stammered something, but Harry missed it. He chased after her, but she was already in her room, so he just continued on to his bedroom.

Harry changed into his sleeping pants and thought about the situation. But the fact remained that he kissed her. He cheated on Ginny, and he couldn't bring himself to regret it.

He missed Hermione, and would never regret anything when it came to her. He heard her sobs and hated himself for being the cause of her tears. That was why he ended things in the first place, but he knew that he couldn't – wouldn't – be able to stay away forever. Then he thought of Ginny, and a fresh wave of guilt washed over him. While he wasn't sorry for his actions, he regretted what it would do to her.

Fuck.

Hermione couldn't sleep. Her mind was reeling over what happened. Harry kissed her. But now, he had a girlfriend.

She sobbed. He promised it would never happen again! She hated how she couldn't resist him. She hated how she felt for him. She hated how she would do anything, give everything, be anyone for him. But she didn't hate him. She never would. She only hated herself.

Ron left early, despite his hangover, for practice. There was a game against Appleby in two days, and he wouldn't be returning until after then. He took his career very seriously, something that both relieved and troubled Hermione. Yes, she was thrilled that he was such a professional despite his attitude in Hogwarts, but that professionalism left her alone with Harry. She did her best to stay away from him, but she knew that it was pointless. She knew he'd find her sooner or later.

"The library, Hermione? If you wanted to hide from me, you should have been less predictable," he said, leaning against the doorway as she sat in her favourite chair.

"Perhaps, or maybe it was the smartest option. If I wanted to hide, why not in a place that seemed so unpredictably predictable. Tell me, how many rooms did you search before this one?" she said, setting her book down to face him, a smirk on her face. He looked away and she knew she was right. "And I am not hiding-"

"Not anymore-"

"I was just...delaying the inevitable. I know you want to talk about last night," Hermione said knowingly. He scratched his neck and nodded.

"Hermione, about what happened-"

"You said it would never happen again!"

"I know what I said. I'm sorry I hurt you, but I'm not sorry for kissing you," Harry said. Hermione teared up but quickly wiped her eyes.

"I see no difference."

"The two are not mutually exclusive and you know it. Yes, it was wrong to kiss you because I'm involved with Ginny. But if it was so wrong, then why did you respond and not turn away?"

"Because I love you! Even now, while you love another, I love you with everything I am! It kills me everyday to know that you don't feel the same for me, but I love you too much to give a damn!" Harry grabbed her arm as she tried to flee and spun her to face him. "Let go, Harry!" He grabbed the back of her head with his free hand and kissed her with all he had. She melted into the kiss without question and grabbed him, trying to pull him closer. She pulled away for air and looked at him with nervous eyes.

"Don't ever, ever think that I don't love you, because I do. I love you so much." He kissed her again, and she opened her mouth to him as she held him closer. Their tongues danced together as Harry's hands moved towards her covered breasts, kneading and massaging them just how he knew she liked. She moaned and trailed kisses down his neck, suckling that spot below his ear as she ground onto his growing arousal.

"Harry!" He picked her up and set her down on the chaise as he continued his ministrations. She pulled off his tee and raked her nails down his chest, eliciting a primal groan from the wizard. He made quick work of her top and bra, and kissed her breasts before taking a bud in his mouth, a move that always made her shout. She wiggled against his hardness, making both moan loudly. She unbuttoned and wiggled out of her jeans and panties, leaving her bare to his gaze for the first time in over a year.

"So beautiful," he whispered, sending goosebumps down her body. She tugged at his jeans and he shucked them off with his boxers, then slowed the pace, trying to drag it out as long as possible. Hermione would have none of that, and rubbed herself on his length, rolling her hips to gain some friction. She needed him right then, or she was sure she'd explode. He took the hint and hitched one of her legs on his hip and swiftly entered her. She clawed down his back in pleasure as he pistoned his hips; he bit her when she rolled her hips to meet him.

It didn't take long for either to reach their orgasm; celibacy took a toll on one's stamina. Hermione came first, silently screaming with her back arched like a cat. Harry followed not long after, crying her name while he gripped her hips so tightly she was sure she'd bruise. He pulled out and rested against her on the chaise, kissing her tenderly in their post-coital state.

"I love you," Hermione whispered as the two fell asleep.